Funny cat memes that’ll make cat lovers smile

Does your daily dose of cuteness need a refill? Here are some funny cat memes guaranteed to tickle your funny bone and melt your heart.

Can there be any animal cuter than a cat? Well, they’re certainly unique.

So, prepare for a smile and celebrate our feline overlords in all their glory. Meow!

Funny Cat Memes


Please share this post with your friends:

Did any of these funny cat memes make you smile, dear reader? I hope so. And if they did, please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face, and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

Then perhaps you’d like some more laughs? Then click on the links below.

Articles you might enjoy:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2024. All rights reserved.

60 witty one-liners on attitude to make you smile

If you’re looking for some witty one-liners on attitude then I’m confident that you might enjoy a few of these here.

Attitude is a little world that has a big impact on all our lives.

A positive attitude beats a negative one if your aim is to get along with other people.

However, sometimes you have to put on your crown and let other people know who is King or Queen.

It doesn’t do to be too agreeable, in my experience. That said, as with all things in life, some balance is essential.

So take five minutes to enjoy these witty one-liners and then please feel free to pass them on.

Witty one-liners on attitude (1-15):

  1. I’m too glam to give a damn!
  2. Life? Don’t talk to me about life!
  3. It’s my life, so I’ll live it my way.
  4. Well, this is not the life I had in mind.
  5. I’m so poor, I can’t even pay attention.
  6. An ounce of action beats a ton of theory.
  7. Life would be tragic if it wasn’t so funny.
  8. I’m not special but I am a limited edition.
  9. I’m me. If that’s a problem for you, tough!
  10. Haters beware. You’re my biggest motivator.
  11. What you think is what you think. Who cares?
  12. Nothing is interesting if you’re not interested.
  13. A bad experience is not the same as a bad life.
  14. If winning isn’t everything, why do we keep score?
  15. Life’s like ice cream. To be enjoyed before it melts.

Witty one-liners on attitude (16-30):

  1. Which part of I DON’T CARE don’t you understand?
  2. Is it just me or is the world run by complete idiots?
  3. Life’s far too short to be drinking poor quality wine.
  4. Fight the system by all means but it will always win.
  5. Don’t take life too seriously. You won’t get out alive.
  6. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.
  7. Life’s a bitch and then you die. That’s all there is to it.
  8. If it wasn’t for my dog, no one would understand me.
  9. Be like a stamp. Stick to your goal until you get there.
  10. If you think I’m irritating now, wait till you see my bad side.
  11. I could give up every vice, but would life still be worth living?
  12. I don’t need your attitude. I’ve got one of my own, thank you.
  13. Research is what I’m doing when I don’t know what I’m doing.
  14. Just because it matters to you, don’t assume it matters to me too.
  15. You may disapprove of my choices but who are you to judge anyway?

Witty one-liners on attitude (31-45):

  1. Follow your heart but make sure you take your brain with you.
  2. My goal this year was to lose 10 pounds. I’ve just got 13 to go now.
  3. Only those who really care about you can hear you when you’re quiet.
  4. I thought I’d found the key to success, but someone’s changed the lock.
  5. People don’t necessarily change. Sometimes it’s just their mask slipping.
  6. Growing up, did anyone dream of becoming a Health & Safety Inspector?
  7. If you think I’m sarcastic, it’s a good job you never hear what I don’t say.
  8. Minds are like parachutes. They can only function properly if they’re open.
  9. If you don’t know how to thank me, I can tell you now, money works best.
  10. Some people say that nothing’s impossible and yet, I do nothing every day.
  11. The problem’s not the problem. The problem’s your attitude to the problem.
  12. If you have an opinion about my attitude, raise your hand. Now put it in your mouth.
  13. Don’t mistake my efficiency for any desire you think I may have to do your job too.
  14. Yesterday I did nothing and today, I need to finish what I was doing yesterday.
  15. If a woman says to a man, “Do what you want,” the man would be unwise to follow her advice.

Witty one-liners on attitude (45-60):

  1. If you’re caught doing something you shouldn’t have been doing, then just act daft.
  2. Regardless of what you may think, I wasn’t put on this earth just to make you happy.
  3. You may think you’re important but that doesn’t mean everyone else agrees with you.
  4. I thought my mood couldn’t get any worse today, and then my boss gave me more work.
  5. Why is it that when the only tool I have is a hammer, every problem looks like a nail?
  6. Happiness is when you marry for love and then you realise they’ve got loads of money too.
  7. Being powerful is like being a gentleman, if you have to tell people you are then you aren’t.
  8. I don’t hate you. I’d unplug your life support to recharge my phone but I don’t hate you.
  9. If you’re wondering whether I’m free tomorrow, I’ll tell you now I’m likely to be very expensive.
  10. Work hard eight hours a day and, one day, you could be the boss working twelve hours a day.
  11. This morning I was told to check my attitude. I have and it’s still there. So, what’s the problem?
  12. Don’t confuse my personality with my attitude. My personality depends on me. My attitude depends on you.
  13. I don’t have an attitude problem. You have a problem with my attitude but I fail to see why that’s my problem.
  14. A positive attitude will not solve every problem but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
  15. I didn’t realise how rough my neighbourhood was until I bought an advent calendar and half the windows were boarded up.

Please share this post with your friends:

Did any of these witty one-liners on attitude make you smile, dear reader? I hope so. And if they did, please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

Then perhaps you’d like some more laughs? Then just click on the links below.

Articles you might enjoy:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2024. All rights reserved.

32 witty, one-liner jokes about getting old to make you smile

Looking for some jokes about getting old, dear reader? Well, today I can offer you 32 of them.

Whether you’re young or old, I’m sure you’ll be able to relate to a few of them.

I hope you enjoy them all and I hope they make you smile. Certainly, they all made me smile.

And remember this; we all get older, but getting old is a state of mind much more than anything else. You don’t have to let the old man or woman in.

Anyway, take a few moments to read them all and then pass them on.

Jokes about getting old:

Please share this post with your friends:

Dear reader, did these jokes about getting old make you smile? I do hope so.

Perhaps you feel that you could still use a good laugh?

If so. then please click on the links below. I’m confident that you’ll find plenty of smiles to amuse you.

And if you did enjoy what you’ve read today, please share this post with your friends on social media. When you share, everyone wins.

It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles. And you’ll be helping an aspiring blog to reach a wider audience.

Thank you for your support.

Articles you might enjoy:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2024. All rights reserved.

40 Bad jokes that are funny and will make you smile

If you’re looking for some bad jokes that are funny and will make you smile, then here are 40 original jokes, written just for you, and which I hope you will enjoy.

Please feel free to pass them on.

Bad jokes that are funny (1–10):

Bad jokes that are funny (11–20):

Bad jokes that are funny (21-30):

Bad jokes that are funny (30–40):

I started work on a construction site, and the foreman asked me whether I was familiar with boring. “Sure,” I said. “I can be as boring as the best of them.

Please share with your friends:

So, dear reader, did any of these bad jokes that are funny prove to be as funny as you’d hoped?

I hope so.

However, there are plenty more laughs for you if you click on the links below. You’ll find plenty of smiles to amuse you.

And if you’ve enjoyed what you’ve read today, please share it with your friends on social media. When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

If you could share it now, then I would be ever so grateful. You’d be helping a keen blogger reach a wider audience.

Thank you for your support, dear reader.

Articles you might enjoy:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2024. All rights reserved.

60 witty jokes with puns that will raise a smile or two

jokes with punsIf you enjoy witty jokes with puns in them then today’s post was written just for you, dear reader. I’ve put together 60 great puns that I hope will raise a few smiles with readers.

They all made me smile and I hope they tickle you too.

Grab a coffee and take a few moments to enjoy them all.

And please fee free to pass them on to your friends.

Jokes with puns (1-20):

  1. A joke isn’t a dad joke until it’s full groan.
  2. Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.
  3. If you have any fresh vegetable puns lettuce know.
  4. I’ve just seen a baguette in the zoo. It’s bread in captivity.
  5. My friend has a dwarf cow that only gives condensed milk.
  6. I’m learning to count in binary and it’s as easy as 1 10 11.
  7. If a deaf man appears in court, is that still called a hearing?
  8. Why is it that you park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?
  9. I’ve been craving some oxygen and potassium. Is that OK?
  10. 50% off medieval punishment devices. Hurry whilst stocks last!
  11. Should the stealing of someone’s coffee be known as a mugging?
  12. I’m on a nut-free diet. I have to avoid people who drive me nuts.
  13. My son’s put his Grandma on speed dial. He calls it Instagran.
  14. I sympathize with batteries. I’m never included in anything either.
  15. What do we want? An end to acronyms. When do we want it? ASAP!
  16. What’s the difference between a fish and a piano? You can’t tuna fish.
  17. I’ve got a new job as a guillotine operator. I’ll beheading there shortly.
  18. Thanks to autocorrecting, I seem to be having some kind of midlife crisps.
  19. When you’re down by the sea and an eel bites your knee, that’s a Moray.
  20. I’m trying to think of an egg-sample of food that can be fried or boiled.

Jokes with puns (21-30):

  1. Apparently, the Wheelbuilders Association is looking for a spokesperson.
  2. Grammar’s the difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.
  3. I’d never let my kids watch a symphony orchestra. There’s too much sax and violins.
  4. I’m always being criticized for my poor grammar but why can’t people just except it?
  5. I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes. Turns out it was the refrigerator.
  6. My Eastern European mail-order bride is on her way from Prague. I’m told, the Czech’s in the post.
  7. My son’s been eating electrical cable, so I’ve had to ground him until he conducts himself properly.
  8. The President wants to ban pre-shredded cheese. Apparently, his aim is to make America grate again.
  9. Swarms of flying insects are threatening a town. Apparently, the police have deployed a SWAT team.
  10. My wife blocked me on Facebook because I’ve been posting too many bird puns. Well, toucan can play at that game.

 Jokes with puns (31-40):

  1. Did you know that the legendary martial artist and movie star Bruce Lee had a vegan brother? Apparently, his name was Broco Lee.
  2. Why does the Government keep referring to a “Roadmap out of lockdown” when I think it should be the “Road to de-mask-us?”
  3. I’ve been trying to think of a carpentry pun that woodwork. I think I nailed it with my first try, but nobody saw it, so I guess I screwed up.
  4. There’s a story in the press about a man who assaulted his neighbour with milk and cheese. How dairy!
  5. My friend Jack says he can communicate with vegetables. Apparently, Jack and the beanstalk.
  6. I’m planning to open a fitness centre for Star Trek fans. It will be called, “It’s Life Gym.”
  7. A German butcher traded a sausage for a seabird. Apparently, he took a tern for the wurst.
  8. There are no words in the English language with all the vowels in alphabetical order, I said facetiously.
  9. Why is the divorce rate so high amongst tennis players? Well, to them love is nothing.
  10. I’ve just seen a dwarf climbing down a prison wall. It was a little condescending.

Jokes with puns (41-50):

  1. My local hospital has a sign saying, “Thieves Operate Here.” Personally, I’d prefer that to be surgeons.
  2. Don’t tell your secrets in a garden. The potatoes have eyes, the corn has ears and the beanstalk.
  3. My geography teacher asked me what I knew about Damascus. I told her that as far as I know, it kills 99% of household germs.
  4. My child was refusing to come with me on a bike ride, so I had to use a little reverse cycology.
  5. A hole has been found in the perimeter wall surrounding the nudist camp. The police are looking into it.
  6. My wife told me that I have what it takes to light up a room, but only if I move away from the window.
  7. There are three types of people in this world. Those who can do arithmetic and those who can’t.
  8. Why do I always wear two pairs of pants when I’m playing golf? Because I always get a hole in one.
  9. I’ve just got back from my appointment with my physician. She said that I’ve got to have an earring made. Seemed like an odd thing for her to say.
  10. I confided with my father that my wife wanted me to stop living in an imaginary world. He said, “What wife?”

Jokes with puns (51-60):

  1. I asked my wife if I was the only one she’d ever been with and she said, “Yes.” Apparently, all the others had been nines and tens.
  2. If a synchronized swimmer drowns, do the other team members have to drown too?
  3. DAD: Go to bed, the cows are sleeping in the field. DAUGHTER: What’s that got to do with anything? DAD: It’s pasture bedtime.
  4. Thanks to our mutual dislike of newspaper puzzles, my wife and I have enjoyed a long and happy marriage. Thirty years and not a crossword between us.
  5. A friend of mine has taken early retirement from the Post Office. Apparently, he couldn’t refuse the package they offered.
  6. A lot of people are shocked when they find out what a terrible electrician I am.
  7. I arrive early for my booking at the restaurant last night and the manager asked me if I’d wait a little. “That’s fine,” I said. To which he responded, “That’s great! Take these drinks to Table 5.”
  8. Someone threw a jar of mayonnaise at me and I was like, “What the Hellman!”
  9. There was a huge fight last night at my local seafood restaurant. Apparently, there was battered fish everywhere.
  10. Everyone at Liverpool’s John Lennon International Airport has been quarantined. Imagine ….. all the people.

Please share with your friends:

So dear reader, did you enjoy witty jokes with puns? Was this post worth a little piece of your time? I do hope so.

If you did enjoy this post then please share it with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins.

So go on, please share this post now and you’ll be making an old blogger very happy.

Thank you for your support.

Articles that might appeal to you:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2024. All rights reserved.

30 funny dating profile examples or how not to write one

funny dating profile examplesIn days gone by the dating game was simple. You went to a dance on a Saturday night and, with a bit of luck, you met someone nice who was willing to see you again.

Obviously, the modern dating scene is very different. The age of the dating app makes the process difficult, insofar as you don’t get to meet someone unless they like what they see and what you have to say in your profile.

So you need a flattering photo, naturally, as well as a great sales pitch. And it really needs to be a sales pitch because you are actually trying to sell yourself to any potential dates who are checking out your profile.

A good sales pitch should highlight your unique selling proposition and the reasons why you’re a worthy date. Your words should be positive and scream “I’m a great catch, so grab me whilst I’m still available.” In short, your words should be a call to action.

Any decent salesperson could tell you this, so there’s nothing unique in what I’m saying here. You’d think it was obvious, wouldn’t you?

Following a close inspection of a few dating apps, I can tell you that there are plenty of people out there who haven’t helped themselves when they wrote their profiles.

However, whilst such people don’t necessarily do themselves any favours with their profiles, their words have the potential to make us all laugh.

So here are 30 funny dating profile examples that really made me smile. These are from real apps, albeit I wonder whether some were written tongue-in-cheek.

Funny dating profile examples (1-15):

  1. Miserable soul looking for love.
  2. Recovering alcoholic seeking soul mate.
  3. My life’s a car crash, can you make it better?
  4. I’ve just got the all-clear, so I’m ready for love again.
  5. Manic depressive looking for a nice girl to cheer him up.
  6. If you’ve got a fetish for body odour then I’m your man.
  7. I hate men but could you be the one to change my mind?
  8. So far, I’ve had 60 lovers at college, will you be my 61st?
  9. Looking for someone to pay my bills and take care of me.
  10. If you’ll be my meal ticket I’ll be your pampered princess.
  11. My relationships never work out but I’m willing to try again.
  12. Angry bitch looking for that special one to make his life hell.
  13. Don’t think of me as bald, think hairstyle that says minimalism.
  14. If you can handle a drama Queen then I could be the one for you.
  15. Served my sentence for assault and battery. Now looking for love.

Funny dating profile examples (16-30):

  1. If you’ll cook, clean and do my ironing then you’re the girl for me.
  2. I enjoy long walks and candlelit dinners and someone to pay the bill.
  3. Bad teeth, bad breath, body odour and acne but otherwise a great catch.
  4. Had my fun and I’ve got three kids to prove it. So what can you offer me?
  5. If you’re looking for a fixer-upper then I could be the challenge you need.
  6. As long as I always get my own way in every situation, I can be flexible.
  7. I hate everyone, so why should I like you? You’ll need a good story to tell.
  8. If you’re looking for a bird with a lot of troublesome baggage, then I’m your girl.
  9. My mother will always be my first priority but if that works for a girl like you, swipe right.
  10. If you’re looking for someone considerate, kind and caring then you’d better swipe left.
  11. I’ve got all the looks, charm and intelligence anyone could possibly want and I’m modest too.
  12. With three kids and one on the way, I’m looking for a father for them. Could you be the one?
  13. I can be difficult, jealous, sarcastic and moody. Could you be the one to make me happy?
  14. You could be my downtime, my spare time, my part-time, and my sometime. Someone I turn to when I’ve nothing better to do.
  15. Bald man with no job, no money, no prospects and living with his parents is looking for a good woman with her own house and car. Could you be the one?

Please share this post:

So dear reader, was this post amusing and worth a few minutes of your time?

If any of these funny dating profile examples made you smile then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

Then perhaps you’d like some more laughs? Then just click on the links below.

Thank you for your support.

Articles that might appeal to you:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2024. All rights reserved.

32 brilliant short jokes to make you smile

If you’re looking for some brilliant short jokes to make you smile, dear reader, I have 32 here today that will tickle you.

So, please take a few minutes and enjoy them all.

And feel free to share them with your friends.

Brilliant short jokes (1-10):

Brilliant short jokes (11-20):

Brilliant short jokes (21-32):

Please share this post:

So, dear reader, did you enjoy these brilliant short jokes? Were they worth a few minutes of your time?

If any of these one-liners made you smile, then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

Then perhaps you’d like some more laughs? Then just click on the links below.

Thank you for your support.

Articles that might appeal to you:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2024. All rights reserved.

25 brilliant one-liner quotes that’ll raise a smile

brilliant one-liner quotesHere are 25 brilliant one-liner quotes guaranteed to raise a smile. I loved them all and I’m confident you will too. Enjoy!

Brilliant one-liner quotes:

  1. Everything’s difficult before it’s easy.
  2. I do all my own stunts but never intentionally.
  3. Don’t trust children. They’re here to replace us.
  4. Your secret’s safe with me. I wasn’t even listening.
  5. If only we could invoice people for wasting our time.
  6. I’m going to stop putting things off, starting tomorrow.
  7. Work is just something I’m doing until I win the lottery.
  8. Sarcasm is just punching people in the face with words.
  9. The road to success has so many tempting parking spaces.
  10. You never know what you’ve got until you clean your room.
  11. Be like the postage stamp. Stick to a thing until you get there.
  12. I intended to behave but there were so many other options.
  13. If Cinderella’s shoe was such a perfect fit, why did it fall off?
  14. Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it’s only Tuesday.
  15. Reality is the leading cause of stress for those in touch with it.
  16. Revenge sounds so mean. I prefer to call it returning the favour.
  17. They say nothing’s impossible but I’ve been doing nothing all day.
  18. I’m still waiting for the wisdom I was assured would come with age.
  19. If one door opens when another closes, your house is probably haunted.
  20. You know it’s time to move on when the best part of your job is a chair that swivels.
  21. If you want your children to listen to you, try talking in a very low voice to someone else.
  22. If you’re going to get into trouble for hitting someone, you might as well hit them hard.
  23. People who can’t find time for rest and recreation will be forced to make time for illness, sooner or later.
  24. All I’m saying officer is that if you caught me then you must have been speeding too and no one is above the law.
  25. When you get angry take a deep breath and count to 10. Then throw a punch at 8. Nobody expects that.

Enjoyed these one-liners? Please share this post:

So dear reader, was this post amusing and worth a few minutes of your time?

If any of these one-liners made you smile then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

Then perhaps you’d like some more laughs? Then just click on the links below.

Articles that might appeal to you:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2024. All rights reserved.

19 Best Homer Simpson quotes that’ll make you smile

Best Homer Simpson quotes

Image by Alan Nakkash

These have got to be 19 of the very best Homer Simpson quotes and I’m confident they’ll raise a smile or two with readers. Homer’s take on life is always witty and very funny.

I love the Simpsons and, in particular, Homer Simpson’s philosophy on life never fails to get me laughing out loud. So today I thought I’d take a look back at some of his most memorable quotes.

If you like the Simpsons, I’m sure you will enjoy looking back at Homer’s words of wisdom.

Enjoy them all.

Best Homer Simpson quotes:

  1. Trying is the first step toward failure.
  2. Operator! Give me the number for 911!
  3. If he’s so smart, how come he’s dead?
  4. I never apologize. I’m sorry but that’s the way I am.
  5. Marge, you know it’s rude to talk when my mouth is full.
  6. Stupidity got us into this mess, and stupidity will get us out.
  7. If I could say a few words, I would be a better public speaker.
  8. Kids, just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I’m not listening.
  9. I’ll make the money by selling one of my livers. I can get by with one.
  10. The problem in the world today is communication; too much communication.
  11. It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.
  12. I thought I had an appetite for destruction, but all I wanted was a club sandwich.
  13. If God didn’t want me to eat chicken in church, then he would have made gluttony a sin.
  14. I’ve learned that life is one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead.
  15. Volunteering is for suckers. Did you know that volunteers don’t even get paid for the stuff they do?
  16. Weaseling out of things is important to learn; it’s what separates us from the animals; except the weasel.
  17. Kids are great. You can teach them to hate what you hate and, with the Internet and all, they practically raise themselves.
  18. Marge, try to understand. There are two types of college students, jocks and nerds. As a jock, it is my duty to give nerds a hard time.
  19. I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.

Please share this post with your friends:

Do you agree that these are some of the best Homer Simpson quotes?

You do? I hope so anyway.

If you enjoyed them, please share this post with your friends on social media because when you share, everyone wins.

So please share this post now. If you can do that for me then I’ll be ever so grateful. You’ll be helping a keen blogger reach a wider audience and that will be your good deed for the day.

Thank you.

Articles that might appeal to you:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2024. All rights reserved.

55 funny quotes about money to make you smile

Money, that’s what I want! And so does everyone else.

It’s a modern obsession. We like to think that it doesn’t matter, but it does. We cannot get far without at least some of it in the modern world.

We all talk about money, and we’re constantly chasing value for money. This is natural, of course, because our lifestyle, such as it is, depends on the money we have and the money we earn.

However, there’s a slightly absurd and amusing side to it all too. So I thought I’d search out some quotes to explore the funny side of money.

Here are 55 funny quotes about money that made me smile and I hope they brighten your day too.

Funny quotes about money (1-20):

Funny quotes about money (21-40):

Funny quotes about money (41-55):

Please share with your friends:

So, dear reader, was this post worth a little piece of your time?

If it was, then please share it with your friends on social media. When you share, everyone wins.

Thank you.

Articles that might appeal to you:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2024. All rights reserved.