33 freedom of speech quotes to get you thinking

If you’re looking for some freedom-of-speech quotes, I’ve curated some that are thought-provoking and interesting.

We live in an era that is often intolerant of those who express ideas and opinions that run counter to the received wisdom of the day.

However, freedom of speech matters to us all if we believe in democracy and the right of individuals to call out ideas that would not be in the interests of the majority.

Freedom of speech is precious, and we must guard it as if our lives depended on it because one day they just might.

So take a few moments to contemplate these quotes, and please feel free to pass them on.

FREEDOM OF SPEECH QUOTES
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Freedom of speech quotes (1-10):

  1. Free speech includes the right to not speak. ~Jimmy Wales
  2. You must stand for free speech in the streets. ~Mary Harris Jones
  3. With honest discussion and free speech, let people’s voices be heard. ~Ron Johnson
  4. I don’t think we should be deprived of the privilege of free speech. ~Loretta Swit
  5. I’m a free-speech bigot. I don’t like censorship; I just don’t think it’s a good thing. ~Fred Wilson
  6. You know, everybody believes in free speech until you start questioning them about it. ~Larry Flynt
  7. Free speech is not just another value. It’s the foundation of Western civilization. ~Jordan Peterson
  8. I think, with never-ending gratitude, that the young women of today do not and can never know at what price their right to free speech and to speak at all in public has been earned. ~Lucy Stone
  9. Stand-up comedy, and comedy in general, is the ultimate form of free speech because you get to poke holes in all the pretentious bubbles politicians and pundits and popes and pretenders try to float over our heads. ~Denis Leary
  10. Free expression is the base of human rights, the root of human nature, and the mother of truth. To kill free speech is to insult human rights, stifle human nature and suppress the truth. ~Liu Xiaobo

Freedom of speech quotes (11-20):

  1. Free speech is the cornerstone of every right we have. ~Mark Thomas
  2. Politicians believe in freedom of speech until it becomes inconvenient to them. ~Tom Irwell
  3. Without free speech no search for truth is possible… no discovery of truth is useful. ~Charles Bradlaugh
  4. Free speech is meant to protect unpopular speech. Popular speech, by definition, needs no protection. ~Neal Boortz
  5. To suppress free speech is a double wrong. It violates the rights of the hearer as well as those of the speaker. ~Frederick Douglass
  6. Free speech is one of the most important things to me, but I think it gets confusing when it comes to offence. Because for one, just because you have the right to say anything, it doesn’t mean you have to. ~Ricky Gervais
  7. The Framers of the Constitution knew that free speech is the friend of change and revolution. But they also knew that it is always the deadliest enemy of tyranny. ~Hugo Black
  8. Liberals shouldn’t cede the responsibility to defend free speech on college campuses to conservatives. After all, without free speech, what’s liberalism about? ~Bari Weiss
  9. You can’t just slander someone, defame them, or lie about them. You can’t incite people to crime. There are all sorts of reasonable restrictions on free speech that are already codified in the British common-law system. ~Jordan Peterson
  10. It is a paradox that every dictator has climbed to power on the ladder of free speech. Immediately upon attaining power, each dictator suppressed all free speech except his own. ~Herbert Hoover

Freedom of speech quotes (21-27):

  1. Fear of serious injury alone cannot justify the oppression of free speech and assembly. Men feared witches and burnt women. It is the function of speech to free men from the bondage of irrational fears. ~Louis D. Brandeis
  2. Free speech rights mean that government officials are barred from creating lists of approved and disapproved political ideas and then using the power of the state to enforce those preferences. ~Glenn Greenwald
  3. Free speech is the right to tell people what they don’t want to hear. The right to express opinions with which others may disagree. If we believe in free speech, then that right must be respected. ~Roy Sutton
  4. In cyberspace, people with different skin colours, nationalities, cultures and languages should be equally entitled to participation, free speech and development. We should abandon prejudices, respect differences, and be tolerant and open. ~Lu Wei
  5. We have no blasphemy laws these days but with that freedom comes the responsibility which should always attend the exercise of free speech: truth, courtesy and awareness of impact. It is the last of these which is so neglected by so much modern comedy. ~Ann Widdecombe
  6. Twitter is a form of free speech, and I’m all for that. But if Cee Lo Green, a maverick of sorts, can’t get on Twitter and say something outlandish or outrageous, then what is the whole point of Twitter at all? ~CeeLo Green
  7. None of us believes in an untrammelled right to free speech. We all agree there are always going to be lines that, for the purposes of law and order, cannot be crossed; or for the purposes of taste and decency, should not be crossed. We differ only on where those lines should be drawn. ~Mehdi Hasan

Freedom of speech quotes (27-33):

  1. That I have the right to express myself freely at all times in all circumstances entails the idea that free speech is a ‘basic human right’ possessed by each individual, and, as such, trumps the interests of the society or group, including my neighbour. ~Tom Stoppard
  2. One of the problems with defending free speech is you often have to defend people that you find to be outrageous and unpleasant and disgusting. ~Salman Rushdie
  3. You can’t have a university without having free speech, even though at times it makes us terribly uncomfortable. If students are not going to hear controversial ideas on college campuses, they’re not going to hear them in America. I believe it’s part of their education. ~Donna Shalala
  4. The fact that we’re protected under the Constitution in exercising the right of free speech, it’s a wonderful thing. You’ve got to come from somewhere else to realize how valuable it is. ~Pat Oliphant
  5. You should protest about the views of people you disagree with over major moral issues, and argue them down, but you should not try to silence them, however repugnant you find them. That is the bitter pill free speech requires us to swallow. ~Julian Baggini
  6. The idea that corporations have the same First Amendment protections of free speech as people is troubling. Corporations are not people. They don’t attend our schools, get married and have children. They don’t vote in our elections. ~Hank Johnson
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21 Interesting quotes by Edgar Allan Poe

Today, I thought exploring some quotes by Edgar Allan Poe might be interesting.

Edgar Allan Poe was an American writer, poet, editor, and literary critic best known for his poetry and short stories, particularly his tales of mystery and macabre.

Born in Boston in 1809, he was the first well-known American writer to earn a living solely through writing, which resulted in a financially difficult life and career.

Whatever you might think of his work, he was successful because his name and written work live on to this day.

So, take a few moments to consider these quotes, and please feel free to pass them on.

QUOTES BY EDGAR ALLAN POE
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Quotes by Edgar Allan Poe (1-10):

  1. Lord, help my poor soul.
  2. Stupidity is a talent for misconception.
  3. We loved with a love that was more than love.
  4. All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.
  5. With me, poetry has not been a purpose, but a passion.
  6. I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it.
  7. Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered weak and weary.
  8. The nose of a mob is its imagination. By this, at any time, it can be quietly led.
  9. Man’s real life is happy, chiefly because he is ever expecting that it soon will be so.
  10. To vilify a great man is the readiest way in which a little man can himself attain greatness.

Quotes by Edgar Allan Poe (11-21):

  1. If you wish to forget anything on the spot, make a note that this thing is to be remembered.
  2. All religion, my friend, is simply evolved out of fraud, fear, greed, imagination, and poetry.
  3. Beauty of whatever kind, in its supreme development, invariably excites the sensitive soul to tears.
  4. They who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night.
  5. The true genius shudders at incompleteness and usually prefers silence to saying something which is not everything it should be.
  6. It is by no means an irrational fancy that, in a future existence, we shall look upon what we think our present existence, as a dream.
  7. There are few cases in which mere popularity should be considered a proper test of merit; but the case of song writing is, I think, one of the few.
  8. That pleasure, which is at once the most pure, the most elevating and the most intense, is derived, I maintain, from the contemplation of the beautiful.
  9. The ninety and nine are with dreams, content but the hope of the world made new, is the hundredth man who is grimly bent on making those dreams come true.
  10. In one case out of a hundred a point is excessively discussed because it is obscure; in the ninety-nine remaining it is obscure because it is excessively discussed.
  11. I need scarcely observe that a poem deserves its title only in as much as it excites, by elevating the soul. The value of the poem is in the ratio of this elevating excitement.
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How will your life be measured? Here’s what matters most

How will your life be measured? A philosophical question, perhaps, but an interesting one nevertheless.

Some time ago, I attended the funeral of someone whom I’d known quite well professionally but not at all socially. Someone I liked and respected, but I wouldn’t claim to have known them well overall. Nevertheless, funerals are a time to reflect on someone’s life. A time to consider the impact they’ve had on other people throughout their lives.

The funeral service was held at a large, traditional church in London, and it was crowded.

Listening to the eulogy and associated readings, I began to appreciate how much my late colleague had meant to so many people. It’s fair to say that she meant a lot to many people. The lives of so many people had clearly been blessed by her presence in them.

This experience made me think.

How-will-your-life-be-measured
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So in life, what matters most?

As human beings, we’re all driven to achieve and leave our mark on life before we pass on.

However, we do tend to measure our impact on life in terms of careers and money. With those things, it’s fairly easy to keep score, wouldn’t you agree, dear reader?

Careers provide tangible evidence of achievement, or so it seems.

So, climbing the greasy pole and increasing our wealth tend to be the measures we use when we consider the idea of success. Nevertheless, as I sat there listening that day, I had to ask myself, are these things the most appropriate measure of the lives we lead?

Anything we do that only has a long-term payoff, we tend not to measure because there’s no immediate evidence of achievement. We can’t see the immediate impact of the small things we do, so we don’t believe they matter much.

However, I realized that day that they do matter. They matter a great deal.

It’s all in the little things we do:

A random act of kindness might not mean much to us, but to the recipient of our action, it could mean the world. It could have had a profound effect on that individual. And it might prove to be a life-changing experience for that person.

So, how will any of us be remembered?

When our lives have passed, how will they talk about us at our funerals?

People won’t talk about the size of our house or our car, but they will talk about how we made them feel. They won’t talk about the importance of our jobs, but they will mention how we helped them at a difficult time in their lives.

Perhaps they’ll talk about how we mentored them and how they’re a better person because of the impact we had on their lives. Maybe they’ll say they enjoyed our company, and they’ll talk about how they looked forward to seeing us whenever we were around. Perhaps they’ll just mention how we made them smile.

When you think about it, why would we want to be remembered in any other way?

Material possessions are meaningless:

Let’s face it, material possessions are meaningless. Equally successful careers are as much a reflection of good fortune as they are of anything we did to justify them.

That’s not the case when it comes to the impact we have on the lives of others.

The help we give and the kindness we show are all down to us and our actions day-to-day.

So, how many people we’ve helped seems to me like a much better measure of success than the size of the car we drive or the size of the house in which we live.

Real success in life comes down to the difference we make. How we’ve touched the lives of other people.

Certainly, that’s how I think we’ll be remembered by those who knew us, however much we’re focused on careers, money, and material possessions.

How great would it be to be remembered fondly and with respect by all who crossed our paths during our lives?

How will your life be measured?

I remembered my thoughts that day at the funeral when I stumbled upon this video of a presentation given by Clay Christensen at TEDxBoston.

It offers a great perspective on how your life will be measured.

I recommend you watch this video, as it’s well worth a little bit of your time.

And after you’ve watched it, I would suggest you reflect on this question:

How do you want to be remembered, dear reader?

For me, life’s measure should be in terms of how I’ve touched the lives of other people and not money, career, and the size of my house.

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31 sarcastic responses to rude people

Looking for some sarcastic responses to rude people, dear reader?

If you’ve ever worked in the retail trade, as I have, you’ll have encountered plenty of rude people.

That said, just travelling on public transport these days can expose us all to rude people.

Well, if you meet any, it’s always helpful to have some ammunition to respond.

So today I’ve put together 31 sarcastic responses to rude people that you might find come in useful in the weeks and months ahead. They might just make you smile, too.

So take a few moments to enjoy them all, and please feel free to pass them on.

sarcastic responses to rude people
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Sarcastic responses to rude people (1-10):

  1. I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were such an expert.
  2. Well, thanks for your input. I’ll be sure to ignore it.
  3. Oh, pardon me. I didn’t realize you made all the rules.
  4. My bad! I didn’t realize my sarcasm would be lost on you.
  5. Well, I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize I was speaking to a genius.
  6. Excuse me, I didn’t realize I was dealing with a professional critic.
  7. Well, thank you for that germ of wisdom. I’m sure it will come in handy.
  8. Gee, I’m sorry I didn’t realize you were the only person on the planet who really matters.
  9. Wow, your rudeness is truly impressive. I’m sure it takes a lot of effort to be such a complete jerk.
  10. Thanks for your advice. It’s always nice to have an opinion from someone who thinks they’re an expert.

Sarcastic responses to rude people (11-20):

  1. I’m sorry, I didn’t realize I was talking to an encyclopaedia.
  2. That’s a great point. And here’s me thinking you were just stupid.
  3. I’m sorry if I dared to have an opinion of my own. I’ll make sure to only speak when spoken to next time.
  4. I can only apologize for not being a mind reader. I’ll be sure to work on my telepathy skills before we meet again.
  5. Thank you for your valuable feedback. I’ll be sure to take it into consideration as I strive to be an even worse person.
  6. Your kind words are truly appreciated. I’ll be sure to add them to the list of reasons why I never want to interact with you again.
  7. Clearly, I should have recognised that you were in a bad mood before you took it out on me. I’ll be sure to avoid you next time.
  8. Well, I apologize if my presence offends you. I’ll be sure to stay out of your sight next time, so as not to disrupt your perfect world.
  9. Thank you for your generous gift of insults and disrespect. I’ll treasure it always and strive to be a more worthy recipient of your abuse.
  10. Oh, thank you for reminding me of my place. I’ll be sure to remember that people in jobs like mine are unworthy of kindness and respect.

Sarcastic responses to rude people (21-31):

  1. Who died and made you the boss?
  2. Goodness, I didn’t realize I was dealing with a mind reader.
  3. If only I’d known you were such an authority on this subject.
  4. I’m sorry, I didn’t realize being rude was part of the conversation.
  5. Now, that’s an interesting perspective. I’m sure it will help me grow.
  6. Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you ruled the universe and were entitled to treat others like dirt.
  7. Clearly, my mere existence is an inconvenience to you. I’ll try to be more obsequious next time we meet.
  8. I can only apologize for not meeting your high standards of perfection. I’ll try harder to be more like you in the future.
  9. Excuse me if I didn’t live up to your expectations. I’ll try to be more incompetent next time to suit your needs better.
  10. I’m sorry for not being telepathic and knowing exactly what you wanted without you having to communicate it. I’ll try to do better next time.
  11. Forgive me! I didn’t realize you were such an authority on everything. Do continue to enlighten me with your vast knowledge and excellent manners.
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Put a smile on someone else’s face, and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

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If any of these sarcastic responses to rude people made you smile, please share them with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face, and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

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Thank you for your support.

75 hilarious quotes you’ll just love

If hilarious quotes are what you’re seeking today, dear reader, then I have curated 75 excellent ones for you.

Some are by authors unknown, and some are by famous people. However, they’re all witty and fun.

So, buckle up and see how many of these you can relate to. Either way, enjoy them all.

And feel free to share them with your friends.

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31 Interesting quotes by Lucius B. Wack

If it’s interesting quotes you’re looking for, dear reader, then I have 31 more excellent observations from my good friend Lucius B. Wack.

Regular readers will know that a couple of my recent posts have curated quotes from this modern philosopher.

As previously stated, Lucius B. Wack is someone I admire, so I thought it might be interesting to share some more of his thoughts on life today.

So, read these interesting quotes and see what you think.

I hope you find these observations about modern life in the Western world interesting.

If you do, then please feel free to pass them on to your friends.

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Interesting Quotes (1-10):

Interesting Quotes (11-20):

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Interesting Quotes (21-31):

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6 short story jokes guaranteed to make you laugh

6 short story jokes

Here are six short story jokes guaranteed to make you laugh. They made me howl with laughter, so I hope they’ll brighten your day too. Enjoy them all.

SHORT STORY JOKES
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Short story jokes:

1. The Deaf Debt Collector:

The Mafia was looking for a new man to make weekly collections from all the private businesses subject to their protection racket.

As they were feeling the heat from the Police, they decided to use someone deaf for the job. If someone deaf gets caught, they figured he wouldn’t be able to communicate easily with the Police.

In his first week on the job, the deaf debt collector picks up over $50,000. That’s a lot of money, he thinks, and the deaf debt collector’s greed gets the better of him. He decides to keep the money, and he stashes it in a safe place.

However, it’s not long before the Mafia realises that the collection is late and they send out a couple of heavies to look for the deaf debt collector.

They soon find him and ask the deaf debt collector what he’s done with the money. The problem is that the deaf debt collector can’t communicate with them either, so the Mafia heavies drag him off to an interpreter.

They get to a sign language interpreter and the leading Mafioso then says, “I want ya to ask him where da money is.

So the interpreter signs, “Where’s the money?

The deaf debt collector tries to bluff his way out of his dilemma by saying, “I don’t know what they’re talking about.

The interpreter looks at the Mafioso and says, “He’s saying he doesn’t know what you’re talking about.

The Mafioso reaches into his coat and pulls out a .44 Remington Magnum handgun, which he points at the forehead of the deaf debt collector, and with real menace in his voice, he says to the interpreter, “Ask him where da money is, and tell him I won’t be askin’ again.

So the interpreter immediately signs, “Where’s the money? He says he won’t ask again, and I think he’s serious.

At this point, the deaf debt collector’s nerve goes, and he signs, “The $50,000 is in Central Park, hidden in the third tree stump on the left by the gate near 72nd Street on Central Park West, and close to Strawberry Fields.

Getting impatient, the Mafioso looks at the interpreter and asks, “What did he say?

The interpreter looks at the Mafioso and says, “He says he still doesn’t know what you’re talking about, he thinks you’re an idiot, and he doesn’t think you’ve got the balls to pull the trigger!

2. The Balloonist and the Programmer:

A man is flying in a hot air balloon, and soon realizes he’s completely lost.

So he starts reducing height, and suddenly spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon a little further and then shouts: “Excuse me, sir, I was wondering, can you tell me where I am? I seem to be lost.

Taken by surprise, the man looks up and replies, “Yeah, that’s easy. You’re in a hot air balloon, hovering about 25 feet above this field.

You must work in IT. I’m guessing you work as a programmer?” says the balloonist.

I do and yes, I am,” replies the man, looking a little surprised, “How did you guess?

Well,” says the balloonist, “everything you’ve told me is technically correct, but it’s of no actual use to anyone.

The programmer smiles and then says, “Ah, you must be the CEO of a business.

Yes, I am,” replies the balloonist, “but how could you know that?

That’s easy,” says the programmer. “You don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault.

3. The Tiger, the Man, and God:

A man is being chased by a tiger.

He’s running as hard as he can, and eventually, he gets to the edge of a cliff with the tiger still in hot pursuit.

The man looks over the edge of the cliff and sees a branch growing out of the side of the cliff just a few feet down.

Having no other option, the man jumps down and grabs the branch just before the tiger arrives at the cliff edge.

The tiger is growling viciously and pacing backwards and forwards along the cliff edge. The man sighs with relief, as he thinks he’s outsmarted the tiger.

At that moment, a little mouse appears from a crevice in the rock, and it begins to chew on the branch.

The man looks down at what is a drop of hundreds of feet. If he falls, it will surely result in his death. So he looks to the heavens and yelled out, “Dear God, if you are there, please help. I will do anything you ask, but please help.

You say you will do anything I ask?” Without it being questioned?” a voice booms from heaven above.

The man is surprised to get an immediate reply to his plea, but he yells back, “I will gladly do anything you ask, but please save me.

There’s one way to save you, but it will take courage and faith,” says the voice from above.

The man can feel the branch begin to weaken as the mouse continues to gnaw at it, and he can see the tiger still pacing around, growling at the cliff’s edge a few feet above him.

Please, Lord, tell me what I must do, and I will do it. Your will is my command,” shouts the man in despair.

All right then, let go of the branch,” the voice from heaven responds.

The man looks down to a fall of hundreds of feet and certain death. He looks up at the hungry tiger a few feet above him, and then he looks at the mouse still chewing on the branch.

He then looks up at the heavens again and yells, “Is there no one else up there I can speak to?

SHORT STORY JOKES

4. The Mercedes Dealership:

An elderly man returned to a Mercedes dealership to find the salesman had just sold the car he was interested in to a beautiful, busty blonde.

I thought you said you would hold that car for me until I raised the $75.000 asking price,” said the old man. “And now I’m told you just closed a deal for $65,000 to that lovely young lady over there. You insisted there could be no discount on this model.

Well, sir, what can I tell you?” replied the salesman, grinning. “She had the cash in her hand, and just look at her, she’s stunningly beautiful. How could I resist?“.

At this point, the young lady approached the old man and handed him the keys to the car.

There you go,” she said. “I told you I could get this joker to drop his asking price. See you later, Grandpa.”

Moral of the story: Never mess with old people!

5. The Genie:

A customer service agent, an administration clerk, and their manager are all walking to lunch when they stumble upon an old, antique oil lamp.

Knowing that an old oil lamp can often house a genie, they enthusiastically rub it in hopeful anticipation.

Sure enough, out pops a genie.

I am the genie of the lamp, and you can each have one wish,” says the genie.

Me first! Me first!” says the customer service agent. “I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.

There’s a poof sound followed by a cloud of smoke, and the customer service agent’s gone.

Me next! Me next!” says the administration clerk. “I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.

There’s a poof sound followed by a cloud of smoke, and the administration clerk’s gone

The genie then looks at the manager and says, “OK, Boss, I guess it’s your turn now.

I want those two back in the office in exactly 45 minutes,” the manager responds.

Moral of the story: It’s always a good idea to let your boss go first.

6. The Mexican Maid:

A Mexican maid asks for a pay rise from the lady of the house.

The wife is not happy about this, so she decides to talk to the maid about her request for more money.

Now, Maria, why do you want more money?” she asks.

Well, Señora, there are three reasons why I wanna increase,” replies the maid. “The first eez that I iron better than you.

Maria, who said you iron better than me?” responds the wife.

Jor huzban he say so Señora,” Maria replies.

Oh, he did, did he?” says the wife. “And what is your second reason?

The second reason eez that I am a better cook than you,” Maria responds.

That’s nonsense. Who said you’re a better cook than me?” asks the wife.

Jor hozban deed Señora,” Maria replies.

Oh, he did, did he?”  the wife responds, getting increasingly agitated.

The third reason eez that I ama better than you in da bed,” says Maria.

The lady of the house is now angry and, through gritted teeth, she asks, “And did my husband say that too?

No Señora, the gardener deed,” Maria replies.

OK, how much is it you want?” asks her employer.

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Share the fun, and everyone wins.

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29 jokes for 10-year-olds that’ll amuse adults too

There’s an inner child in all of us. If you love childish jokes, here are 29 hilarious jokes for 10-year-olds that I’m confident will amuse many adults too.

Enjoy them all and then pass them on to the children in your life and the adults who’ve not lost their inner child.

And have a great day too.

JOKES FOR 10-YEAR-OLDS

Jokes for 10-year-olds (1-10):

  1. What kind of exercise do lazy people do? Diddly-squats.
  2. What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye matey!
  3. Where do you manufacture average things? A satisfactory.
  4. How do you drown a hipster? Throw him in the mainstream.
  5. I broke my finger last week but, on the other hand, I’m fine.
  6. What sits at the bottom of the sea twitching? A nervous wreck.
  7. Why did the chicken go to the séance? To get to the other side.
  8. What do you call a dog that does magic tricks? A labracadabrador.
  9. What’s the best thing about Switzerland? Well, the flag’s a big plus.
  10. Why do we tell actors to break a leg? Because every play has a cast.

Jokes for 10-year-olds (11-20):

  1. No one is completely useless. We can always serve as a warning to others.
  2. Why don’t math majors go to parties? Because they don’t drink and derive.
  3. What do you call a line of rabbits hopping backwards? A receding hare-line.
  4. A parachute isn’t essential for skydiving, unless you want to go skydiving twice.
  5. Why should you never date a tennis player? Because love means nothing to them.
  6. You can’t lose a homing pigeon. If it doesn’t come home, it was only a pigeon.
  7. Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.
  8. What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn’t really matter because it’s not going to come to you anyway.
  9. My girlfriend accused me of being immature, so I told her she couldn’t play with my toys anymore.
  10. Women used to call me ugly until they realised how much I earn. Now they call me ugly and poor.

Jokes for 10-year-olds (21-29):

  1. What did Charles Dickens keep in his spice rack? The best of thymes; the worst of thymes.
  2. What did the bald man say when he was given a comb as a gift? Thanks, I’ll never part with that.”
  3. Verdana, Arial and Times New Roman walked into a bar and the bartender shouts, “Sorry but we don’t serve your type!”
  4. I saw a guy spill his Scrabble game all over the sidewalk and I asked him, “What’s the word on the street?”
  5. A Roman legionnaire walked into a bar, holds up two fingers and says to the bartender, “Five beers please.”
  6. A woman in labor suddenly started shouting, “Couldn’t, wouldn’t, shouldn’t, didn’t, can’t, won’t ………” The doctor smiled and said, “Don’t worry mam, they’re just contractions.”
  7. A woman says, “Help me, doctor, I’m addicted to Twitter.” The doctor smiled and said, “I’m sorry, I’m not following you.”
  8. The Preacher said to John, “Come forth and you’ll receive eternal life.” Unfortunately, John came fifth but he did win a year’s supply of Todd’s Snickerdoodles.
  9. A bear walks into a bar and says, “Give me a vodka and ………..Coke please.” The bartender says, “Why the big pause?” The bear shrugs and says, “I don’t know, I was born with them.”

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29 JOKES FOR 10-YEAR-OLDS
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This week marks the 80th anniversary of Victory in (VE) Europe Day, so let’s show some respect for Tommy Atkins. 

VE Day was, of course, a celebration. It marked the end of 6 long years of war in Europe in 1945.

It was a celebration in which our nation gave thanks to the brave men and women who served their country and defeated Fascism.

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VE Day also marked the dawn of a new era. An era in which anything seemed possible.

We can look back now and make our own judgement about whether we’ve made the most of those post-World War II opportunities, but that really doesn’t matter.

What matters this week, and every week, is that we pay our respects to those who served.

There are few of them left now, so this is our last chance to thank those who gave their all for our freedom. Sadly, we must remember that many paid the ultimate sacrifice.

The world may not be perfect, but it’s better than it might have been. And it’s thanks to those brave men and women that it is.

As a mark of respect, I wrote today’s poem entitled Tommy Atkins.

In case you’re wondering, Tommy Atkins is a slang term for a common soldier in the British Army. Tommy is the everyman who served in Britain’s army.

So, let’s give thanks to Tommy and all who served to give us the freedom we still enjoy today.

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Please share this post:

So dear reader, was this post amusing and worth a few minutes of your time?

If any of these sarcasm examples made you smile, then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face, and you’ve done your good deed for the day.

So go on, please share this post now.

Then perhaps you’d like some more laughs? Then click on the links below.

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