Steve Jobs’ Top 10 Rules For Success to inspire you

Top 10 Rules for SuccessIf you’re looking for the Top 10 Rules for Success, then there are many people who will give you a list.

However, no two lists will ever be exactly the same and very few people have real experience of success anyway. And surely the only people really worth listening to are those who’ve been there and done it? People who are genuinely successful by any measure.

And so to today’s underlying message. My point today is that if you want success then you’d be wise to look for successful people and copy what they do.

The late Steve Jobs is not only an icon but he was also a great role model to use as your template for achieving real success.

So, in the embedded video, Steve Jobs‘ offers his Top 10 Rules For Success. I recommend that you watch this video, it is inspirational and well worth a few minutes of your time.

Top 10 Rules for Success:

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5 truly inspirational quotes that are thoughtful and deep

Truly Inspirational QuotesWe can all use a little inspiration occasionally, I’m sure you’ll agree dear reader. So here are what I believe to be 5 truly inspirational quotes.

Truly Inspirational Quotes:

Before you speak ask yourself if what you are going to say is true, is kind, is necessary, is helpful. If the answer is no, maybe what you are about to say should be left unsaid. ~Bernard Meltzer

Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved. ~Helen Keller

In a president, character is everything. A president doesn’t have to be brilliant. He doesn’t have to be clever; you can hire clever. You can hire pragmatic, and you can buy and bring in policy wonks. But you can’t buy courage and decency. You can’t rent a strong moral sense. A president must bring those things with him. He needs to have, in that much-maligned word, but a good one nonetheless, a vision of the future he wishes to create. But a vision is worth little if a president doesn’t have the character – the courage and heart – to see it through.  ~Peggy Noonan

If you have made mistakes, even serious ones, there is always another chance for you. What we call failure is not the falling down, but the staying down. ~Mary Pickford

Have patience with all things, but chiefly have patience with yourself. Do not lose courage in considering your own imperfections, but instantly set about remedying them and every day begin the task anew. ~Saint Francis de Sales

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25 inspirational stories of people going from rags to riches

Inspirational StoriesInspirational stories can be so uplifting. Their message always says, if other people can be successful then you can too.

Did you have a tough start in life?

Then perhaps you feel that your difficult past will prevent you from enjoying a successful future?

Well let me tell you, a tough past doesn’t mean you’re doomed to a tough future.

A friend of mine had a very difficult start in life and yet he’s now a millionaire. People do succeed and so can you.

The past is the past, of course, and it can’t be changed. It serves only as a series of lessons to be learned. Remember, the past was simply part of your education and it was not a life sentence.

The future is different. The future has yet to be written and the good news is, you’ve got the pen.

You can create any future you want, as long as you’re determined, focused and prepared to put in plenty of hard work. You won’t get anywhere without those ingredients, I’m afraid.

Nevertheless, in the future there will be a constant stream of opportunities to be seized, just waiting for the fleet-footed and enterprising to grab and exploit them.

Success can be yours, if you’re prepared to make the effort and take a few calculated risks.

Don’t just accept my word, look around for people who’ve actually done it.

There are plenty of inspirational stories if you’ll just look for them. Today I offer you a video with 25 inspirational stories. It’s well-worth a few minutes of your time.

Inspirational Stories25 Inspirational Stories:

In the video included here, there are 25 excellent examples of people who had a tough start in life but went on to enjoy considerable financial success.

These are all inspirational stories of people going from rags to riches. And if they can do it, why not you?

And remember this; you’re never too old.

Colonel Sanders started KFC at the grand old age of 65.

And Ray Kroc began building the business empire we now know as McDonald’s at 52.

Believe you can and you will.

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How to find the right job for you: Simply Explained

Do you enjoy your work? Do you have a job you love? Do you wake-up each morning filled with enthusiasm for the day ahead? Alternatively maybe you just feel your job allows you to earn an income but beyond that you can’t wait until 5 pm when the working day is over? Perhaps you’re constantly asking how to find the right job for you?

If that’s you then you’re not alone.

The acid test when you’re not sure is to ask yourself the lottery question.

What does that mean? If means you ask yourself this, “If I won the lottery and money ceased to be an issue; would I continue to do the work I’m doing now or would I try something else?

Yes of course if you won the lottery you’d have a little fun with the money first, but eventually your life would need a sense of purpose and routine again.

So how would you fill your time then?

If you enjoy what you do, and you are recognized as being very good at it, then you’ll do your job well and you’ll be successful at what you do. And if you enjoy what you do, you’ll never have to work a day in your life. Now, how good would that be?

So if you’re not happy with your job right now, the next question to ask yourself is, “What do I really want to be?

To answer that question, you really need to consider two things:-

  1. What are you good at?
  2. What do you enjoy doing?

These are quite different things but if you can find the sweet spot between them then you have the basis for finding a job you’ll love. So the steps to job heaven are as follows:-

STEP 1: What are you good at?

Not merely competent but really good at?

Think about that question carefully and be honest with yourself.

What activities are intuitive to you? Things you can do easily and readily without having to give them too much thought?

Ask friends and colleagues for their views, and ask them to be really honest with you. Ask people you work with about the tasks for which they consider you to be the absolutely, first choice ‘go-to’ person?

Gather together this information and make a list.

STEP 2: What do you enjoy doing?

Then make a list of all the things you really enjoy doing.

Which activities really give you a buzz?

What activities get you so absorbed that you really lose track of time?

What activities would you do for free or as a hobby, if you couldn’t make a living at them?

Paul McCartney once said that if he couldn’t have made a living out of writing songs and playing music, he’d have done it as a hobby, simply because he loved it so much. In fact, it was his hobby before it was his living.

What activities make you feel the same way? Make that list and don’t be reasonable.

All this requires time for reflection and careful thought, as well as feedback from other people. So do give it the time it deserves.

Don’t jump to conclusions. You do want to ensure you get it right, don’t you?

STEP 3: Where is the common ground between your lists?

When you have your two lists ready, the final step is to identify the common ground between them, the point at which the two lists intersect.

How to find the right job for youIf you find an item that is contained on both lists then you have found the Holy Grail.

Finding something you’re genuinely good at and have a real talent for, and which is also something you really enjoy, will give you the greatest chance of success in life.

It is essential you find the common ground between your lists because:-

  1. If you really enjoy it, you’ll stick with it.
  2. If you’re really good at it, someone will notice

And if you get it right, sometimes people will sprinkle fairy dust on you too. And then a magical career beckons.

Finding job heaven is never about luck.

If you’re doing something you enjoy doing and you’re doing it well, you’ll stick with it long enough to get someone’s attention. And when you get their attention, you’ll dazzle them because you’re doing it well.

That’s not luck; it’s hard work, perseverance and timing.

Once you’ve identified what you want, the next question is, “How do you get it?” That’s another challenge, entirely.

Have you managed to find job heaven? If so, you’re lucky indeed. Enjoy every moment.

If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking;

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How to build wealth from nothing – 5 Top Tips

How to build wealth from nothingThere’s nothing you can do about being born poor. If that was the case, then it was just unfortunate. However, you don’t have to go through life poor.

It is possible to build wealth over time and plenty of people do, frequently from absolutely nothing.

Many people born poor become very wealthy through their own efforts and you can too dear reader.

Here are five tips to help you build wealth from nothing.

How to build wealth from nothing:

1. Pay yourself first:

You may well appreciate that making money can be relatively easy, whilst holding on to it is very, very hard.

We’re all constantly bombarded with reasons why we should spend our money in return for some fleeting sense of gratification. Would that be an experience you recognise dear reader?

It doesn’t have to be that way of course and rich people know that only too well.

So what do rich people do that’s different to everyone else? Simple! They always pay themselves first.

And what do I mean by paying yourself first?

I mean the moment you’re paid, you take a slice off the top of your income immediately and you put it away somewhere safe. And by a slice I mean say 10%, or more if you can afford it.

And what do I mean by somewhere safe?

Well initially that would be depositing your money in an interest-bearing account.

However, once your money starts building into a larger sum then you can start thinking about other forms of investment that’ll give you greater returns potentially. Stocks and bonds for instance.

Building a capital sum is important because as your money grows it starts to generate a second income stream for you. That may not seem important to you now but it will be as you get older.

So paying yourself first is a discipline to which you must adhere until it becomes a habit you do without thinking.

You must always put some money away and you must make that money work hard for you. You must grow and protect your investment portfolio with careful diversification and over time you’ll find yourself building a sizeable fortune.

So here’s today’s mantra for you: Pay Yourself First. Never forget that please dear reader.

2. Be an investor, not a speculator:

You must understand that there’s a big difference between investing and speculation. They’re not the same thing at all.

I don’t wish to imply that there’s something wrong with speculation though. There isn’t.

In the world of finance, speculation brings liquidity to the market and therefore it does have its place.

However, speculation tends to operate on the ‘greater fool’ principle.

By that I mean someone is prepared to buy an asset for a given price in the hope that it can then be sold quickly to someone else, the greater fool, for a greater price.

This is what professional speculators do and they can make money this way because they know what they’re doing and they have sophisticated systems to support them.

However, for ordinary people speculation is like gambling in a casino. And you should never invest your money as though you’re gambling in a casino.

You might get lucky occasionally of course but over time your losses will outstrip any gains you might make, and almost certainly by a significant margin.

So my recommendation to you dear reader is you should never speculate. Instead, you should focus on becoming an investor.

By investing I mean buying stocks and shares in solid, well managed, cash-generative businesses which have the ability to pay good dividends on a sustained basis.

Buy stocks worth holding for the long term. This will provide you with a steady income stream from the dividends regardless of any short to medium term volatility in the market. And spread your risk by building a diversified portfolio.

If you reinvest your dividends then over time you will find that this approach should give you a good return on your money.

If you want to make money and build capital, then my advice to you dear reader is to be an investor, not a speculator.

3. Focus on value not price:

The legendary investor Warren Buffett once said, “Price is what you pay; value is what you get.

With this observation, he’s making a very important point. There’s a distinction between price and value.

A low price for an asset doesn’t necessarily mean you’d be getting value.

And a high price doesn’t automatically mean you would not be getting value.

Price in itself is not a measure of value. You must consider other factors to judge value.

When you’re buying any financial asset, says stocks and shares, you should always focus on value and you must establish metrics by which you can adequately judge the intrinsic value within that asset.

Judged in isolation price is just a number, nothing more.

A lower price means absolutely nothing if you’re getting little or no value in return for your money.

Never, ever forget that it’s the intrinsic value that will determine whether something is really worth buying or not.

Get real value at the right price and then you can get a decent return over time from an investment.

4. Create a personal private income:

Much as we all aspire to do work we love, you must never forget dear reader that ultimately work is simply a means to an end.

Essentially work is just doing stuff for other people in exchange for money. In turn, that money is then the fuel on which we run our lives.

Money provides us with the means to put bread on the table, a roof over our heads and clothes on our backs and those of our loved ones of course.

If you work hard enough you can earn a lot of money.

Manage that money wisely and you can build capital. Invest that capital intelligently and you can create your own personal private income streams.

When you have a decent private income in your own right then you can truly pick and choose the work you do.

Then you only have to do what you enjoy doing; that thing that gives you a genuine sense of purpose.

Creating a personal private income is a worthy goal and it’s well worth the effort.

That way you’re in control of your own life and no one else can dictate what you should and shouldn’t do.

You’ll be in control of the good ship ‘Me’ and only you then decide where it goes.

The message here is, work hard now, so one day you don’t have to work hard.

5. Never forget what matters most:

It would be very easy to believe that a life filled with lots of money and materiality will make you blissfully happy. Well let me tell you, dear reader, in isolation, it won’t.

I’m not suggesting that these things are not important but you must get your priorities right.

Yes, of course, go out there and make money. Manage it carefully. Buy nice things and enjoy some of that money too.

However, to be truly happy you must never lose sight of the most important thing in your life and that is family and friends. People are social animals; we’re not solitary animals like cats. We need other people and most of all we need our loved ones.

So make time for your loved ones, especially your children. Enjoy their company and make the most of every minute with them.

Never focus on work to the exclusion of your family and friends. Without them you have nothing. Money is important of course but people are much more important.

Never lose sight of the people in your life.

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21 quotes to inspire you to greatness and beyond

Quotes to inspire you to greatnessTo achieve greatness we all need a little inspiration we can refer to frequently. So here are 21 quotes to inspire you to greatness. Feel free to bookmark this page and refer to them as often as necessary:

Quotes to inspire you to greatness:

  1. If you want to achieve greatness stop asking for permission. ~Author Unknown
  2. If you are not willing to risk the usual you will have to settle for the ordinary. ~Jim Rohn
  3. Everyone is good at something and once you find it, what you can achieve is limitless. ~Andrew Flintoff
  4. All our dreams can come true if we have the courage to pursue them. ~Walt Disney
  5. Opportunities don’t happen, you create them. ~Chris Grosser
  6. Try not to become a person of success, but rather try to become a person of value. ~Albert Einstein
  7. The whole secret of a successful life is to find out what is one’s destiny to do, and then do it. ~Henry Ford
  8. If you’re going through hell keep going. ~Winston Churchill
  9. The ones who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do. ~Author Unknown
  10. Don’t raise your voice, improve your argument. ~Author Unknown
  11. What seems to us as bitter trials are often blessings in disguise. ~Author Unknown
  12. When you stop chasing the wrong things, you give the right things a chance to catch you. ~Lolly Daskal
  13. I believe that the only courage anybody ever needs is the courage to follow your own dreams. ~Oprah Winfrey
  14. What’s the point of being alive if you don’t at least try to do something remarkable. ~Author Unknown
  15. You can do anything, but not everything. ~Author Unknown
  16. Innovation distinguishes between a leader and a follower. ~Steve Jobs
  17. The starting point of all achievement is desire. ~Napoleon Hill
  18. Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day-in and day-out. ~Robert Collier
  19. Greatness is achieved beyond your comfort zone. No one ever made their mark in life by taking the easy way every time. ~Roy Sutton
  20. Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears. ~Les Brown
  21. The successful warrior is the average man, with laser-like focus. ~Bruce Lee

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5 secret steps to tackling life and achieving success

Achieving SuccessIf you’re looking for a formula for achieving success, dear reader, then you’ll find this blog post useful.

Many desire success but few really achieve it. So it’s useful to study successful people, identify their approach and use them as role models. If their approach worked for them then it might just work for you.

In the embedded video, Hollywood legend, movie star, two-term Governor of California and former Mr Universe, Arnold Schwarzenegger shares his five secret steps to tackling life and achieving success.

Essentially these are his five rules to excel at whatever you choose to do.

He has an interesting story to tell and his story proves that no obstacle is too big to overcome and no vision, too big to achieve, if you’re determined enough and you’re prepared to work hard.

Change the world:

To summarise Arnold Schwarzenegger’s rules, they are:-

  1. Find your vision and follow it;
  2. Never, ever think small;
  3. Ignore the Naysayers;
  4. Work your ass off; and
  5. Don’t just take, give something back.

However, if you listen to Arnold’s story, his burning desire was to move to the United States and become a big star. This was his reason why.

Initially, he had no idea how to achieve that goal but a little piece of good fortune came his way.

Arnold happened to read an article in a magazine about a man just like him who achieved just what he wanted to achieve. The article explained how the man did it and Arnold used that success template as the basis for pursuing his own goal.

Achieving SuccessIdentify successful people and do what they did:

Once he knew his ‘why‘, Arnold Schwarzenegger just needed to work out a way to get there. Knowing your ‘why‘ will always, eventually, lead you to your how.

Once Arnold knew his purpose and his passion, he was always going to find a way to achieve success. His determination and his willingness to do whatever was necessary saw to that.

Had he not been lucky enough to identify a role model through a magazine article, something else would have guided him because that’s the nature of life. When you’re searching for something you’ll tune in to all the little clues you need.

Once you know your why, you develop a keen sense of that subject and everyone else involved.

Trust yourself:

If you know your why then you’ll have the drive and determination to pursue your goal.

Nothing happens by accident of course. You must make it happen.

So figure out for yourself what it is you really, really want. What would make you happy? What would you regard as a real achievement?

Then find a role model.

Someone who’s done what you want to do. Identify how they did it and copy what they’ve done. If their approach worked for them, it can work for you.

Avoid distractions:

If you want to be successful then don’t allow ‘time sucks’ to throw you off course.

Television and social media are the biggest time wasters of all. So avoid them.

Time is a precious resource and successful people don’t waste it. So if you want to be successful, don’t waste your time either. Put every minute to good use.

Know your ‘Why?’

The key message today, both from this article and the embedded video, is that you must know your why.

That’s the starting point for success.

So if you’ve yet to do that then I suggest that’s where you start, if you want to be successful.

And remember this; if not you, who? If not now, when?

Achieving success is possible and people do it all the time. So can you, if you’re determined and prepared to work hard enough to get it.

Good luck.

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7 inspirational quotes about work

Quotes about workToday I offer you some quotes about work.

However, first consider this question. What exactly is work?

Well Physics offers a definition, of course. Essentially it says that it’s the effort required to move a force through a distance.

However, that’s not really my point today. I’m talking about work in relation to people. That thing that, for most people, takes up eight hours of each and every weekday. Now, in that sense, work is simply doing stuff for other people in exchange for money.

Do what you enjoy doing:

Ideally you should be doing stuff you enjoy doing because if you enjoy it you’ll do it well and if you do it well you’ll enhance your value over the long term. And if you really enjoy what you’re doing it won’t seem like work at all.

However if you’re doing stuff for just one person, regardless of how much you enjoy it, essentially you’re just trading your time for money.

Now I’m not suggesting that there’s anything wrong with trading your time. After all, that’s the way most people work. However, that’s not the way to earn serious money, unless you work on Wall Street.

Serve one for many:

To generate a significant income, for most people, you need to be doing stuff for many people simultaneously. One for many, rather than one for one.

For instance, if you write a bestselling book, record a bestselling music album or produce a bestselling video these activities can lead to you making serious money. A period of work by you produces a product which potentially gives pleasure to millions.

Quotes about workBecome an entrepreneur:

Starting a business and selling products by the thousand is another way to make serious money. Becoming an entrepreneur is another way to serve one for many.

The key message for you today dear reader is this; working ‘one-for-one’ can make you a living. Working ‘one-for-many’ can make you a fortune, particularly if you can continue to serve the many whilst you’re sleeping.

Whether it’s becoming a creative person, a performing artist, or starting a business. These are the roads to riches.

It’s never easy of course but it can be done and people do. You could too with a little self-belief.

Here are seven inspirational quotes about work to get you thinking about it.

Quotes about work:

  1. Choose a job you love and you will never have to work a day in your life. ~Confucius
  2. Everyone has been made for some particular work and the desire for that work has been put in every heart. ~Rumi
  3. The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary. ~Vince Lombardi
  4. There is no substitute for hard work. ~Thomas A. Edison
  5. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. ~Steve Jobs
  6. All life demands struggle. Those who have everything given to them become lazy, selfish, and insensitive to the real values of life. The very striving and hard work that we so constantly try to avoid is the major building block in the person we are today. ~Pope Paul VI
  7. Nothing ever comes to one that is worth having, except as a result of hard work. ~Booker T. Washington

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5 funny short story jokes you’ll just have to share with others

Funny Short Story JokeToday I offer you some funny short story jokes, dear reader. I’m confident they’ll make you smile and I’m sure you’ll just have to share them with your friends.

Enjoy them all.

Funny Short Story Jokes:

1. Billy wants to get married:

Young Billy returned home one evening for dinner, after spending the afternoon playing with his little friend Mary who lived next door.

Naturally, his parents asked him what he’d been doing all afternoon.

We played soccer for a while and then I proposed to Mary,” he said.

Not wishing to belittle him, his mum and dad went along with the idea but his dad thought a little fatherly advice might be appropriate at this point.

Billy you do know that being married is an expensive business, don’t you?” said his dad, “How will you both manage?

Well,” said Billy, “with the $5 I get from you for pocket money each week and the $5 she gets from her folks, I think we’ll manage. And I can always take on a paper route to earn extra cash.

Suppressing a strong desire to burst out laughing, his mother said, “That’s all very well Billy but how will you and Mary manage if you were to have a baby?

Well”, said Billy, “we’ve been lucky to avoid that so far.

2. Ben goes to the pool:

Young Ben and his friends went to the local swimming pool for the afternoon.

They were playing around as kids do when the lifeguard shouted at Ben, “Hey kid, you’re not allowed to pee in the pool!

But everyone pees in the pool”, Ben responded.

Maybe so kid”, said the lifeguard, “but not from the high diving board.

3. Knock, Knock:

An elderly man was walking down the street one day when he observed a small boy struggling to reach the doorbell at one of the houses.

The kindly old man said to the boy, “Can I help you with that sonny?

At which point he smiled, placed a comforting hand on the boy’s shoulder whilst pressing the doorbell firmly with his other hand.

There”, said the old man, as he stepped back from the door. “Now what do we do young man?

We run like hell mister”, the boy replied.

4. Washing the dog:

Little Johnny went into the store and after some searching around he picked out a large box of laundry detergent.

Having been observing Johnny for a few minutes, the store assistant asked him whether he had a lot of laundry to do.

No”, said Johnny, “I’m not doing any laundry. I’m going to wash my little dog.

The store assistant frowned at him and said, “Listen, sonny, that’s a powerful detergent and far too strong for washing a small dog. It could make him ill or perhaps even kill him if you’re not careful.

Undeterred Little Johnny said he’d take the detergent anyway, then he paid the man and left the store.

A week later Little Johnny was back in the store to buy a Hershey bar. The store assistant saw him and said, “Hey Johnny how’s your little dog?

Oh, he died,” said Little Johnny.

I’m sorry to hear that son but I did warn you about that detergent,” the store assistant replied.

I don’t think it was the detergent,” said Little Johnny.

Really?” said the store assistant, “So what was it then?

“He looked like he was coping very well until the washing machine went into the spin cycle,” Little Johnny replied.

5. The Budgie:

Geoffrey sees a budgie in the window of a pet store and feeling a little sorry for the bird he decides he’ll buy it.

However, he’s quickly disappointed when, despite his best efforts, he can’t get the budgie to talk.

So he decides to go back to the pet store to complain.

I purchased this budgie a month ago now but I can’t get him to utter a single word”, said Geoffrey to the store assistant.

Try him with a mirror”, the store assistant suggested. “Budgies love to look at their own reflection and you’ll soon have him saying, who’s a pretty boy.

So Geoffrey purchased a mirror from the store assistant and returned home with his budgie.

Once again he was disappointed, as the budgie still wouldn’t talk.

So once again Geoffrey went to the pet store to complain.

Try him with a ladder”, said the store assistant. “Budgies love climbing and I’m sure he won’t stop talking once he’s got a ladder.

So Geoffrey purchased a little ladder from the store assistant and returned home with his budgie.

Yet again not a word was spoken by the budgie, so a week later Geoffrey was back in the pet store again with the budgie.

Try getting him a bell”, said the store assistant. “The sound of a bell will encourage him to talk I’m sure. At the very least he’ll try to imitate the bell’s sound.

So Geoffrey bought the bell and returned home only to be disappointed yet again.

Two weeks later Geoffrey’s back in the pet store.

How’s your budgie?” asked the store assistant. “Have you got it talking yet?

Finally he did say something”, said Geoffrey. “He looked in the mirror, climbed the ladder, rang his bell, uttered a few words and then dropped off his perch and died.

Oh dear!” said the store assistant. “What did he say?”

He said, doesn’t that damn pet store sell birdseed?” Geoffrey responded.

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15 funny work quotes that will certainly resonate with you

Funny Work Quotes

Today I thought it would be amusing to explore some funny work quotes.

Personally I love my work. I love having a sense of purpose and something to get me out of bed each day.

However, not everyone feels the way I do and anyway, it’s never a good idea to take anything too seriously.

Occasionally we must laugh at the nature of human existence. And a good place to start laughing is with the subject of work.

Love it or hate it, it dominates all our lives nevertheless. So today I’ve pulled together 15 funny work quotes to make you smile.

Once again these quotes come from many sources but one, in particular, I must acknowledge and that’s Cool Funny Quotes where you’ll find some of these and many more besides. So check it out.

Funny work quotes:

  1. Hard work never killed anybody but why take a chance? ~Edgar Bergen
  2. I don’t work on weekends or any other day that ends with “Y”. ~Author Unknown
  3. The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television. ~Author Unknown
  4. Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy. ~Groucho Marx
  5. Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They’re about to announce the lottery numbers. ~The Simpsons
  6. If A is success in life, then A is equal to X plus Y plus Z. Where X is work; Y is play, and Z is keeping your mouth shut. ~Albert Einstein (well, maybe!)
  7. As I have gotten older and wiser I discovered that there are six things that I really loved about my job. Payday, lunchtime, quitting time, vacation time, holidays, and of course retirement. ~Tom Goins
  8. If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn’t have a job if he was any smarter. ~John Gotti
  9. If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential that word would be ‘meetings.’ ~Dave Barry
  10. He’s so lazy that if there were work in bed, he would rather sleep on the floor. ~Paddy O’Dea
  11. Why is Monday so far from Friday and Friday so close to Monday? ~Author Unknown
  12. Got to work this morning and my boss told me ‘have a good day’, so I went home and had a great day! ~Author Unknown
  13. Work is just something I’m doing until I win the lottery. ~Author Unknown
  14. Sometimes the best part of my job is that my chair swivels. ~Author Unknown
  15. I once had a job in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn’t concentrate. ~Author Unknown

Enjoyed these quotes? Please share them:

So dear reader, was this post amusing and worth a few minutes of your time?

If any of these funny quotes made you smile then please share them with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share them now.

Then perhaps you’d like some more laughs? Then just click on the links below.

Other articles guaranteed to amuse you:

© Mann Island Media Limited 2020. All Rights Reserved.