How to turn your yearly income into your monthly income

How-to-turn-your-yearly-income-into-your-monthly-incomeAre you one of those people who feel you should be earning more than you do?

Would you like to know how to turn your yearly income into your monthly income?

To have enough money to enjoy the lifestyle you’d love?

You’d like a greater income but you don’t know how?

Perhaps you feel that big money never flows to people like you?

A natural assumption perhaps, but it’s wrong.

With the right approach, you too can have a lot more money than you have right now. Yes, you can become truly wealthy.

The question is where do you begin?

Well, you can start by understanding the Law of Compensation. In the video included here the self-help guru, Bob Proctor explains that income is earned according to the Law of Compensation.

The Law of Compensation:

Bob explains that the Law of Compensation states that the amount of money you earn will always be in exact ratio to the following three points, namely:-

  1. The NEED for what you do.
  2. Your ABILITY to do it.
  3. The DIFFICULTY there would be in REPLACING YOU.

Now you have no control over points 1 and 3, so you must concentrate on point number 2. You must be constantly honing your skills and become a master of whatever you do.

That said, becoming a master of what you do is only part of the solution.

To earn more you must decide on your strategy for earning money. In the video Bob Proctor explains that there are in fact only three strategies for earning money.

The Strategies for Earning Money:

So what are the three income earning strategies? Bob Proctor describes these are M1; M2; and M3. In more detail that means:-

M1: Trading your time for money:

Essentially this is paid employment and it is the way that 96% of people earn an income.

The problem is that, unless you’re a Wall Street banker, you’re unlikely to get rich this way. In fact it probably explains why you’re not rich right now.

M2: Invest Money to Earn Money:

Assuming you’re working for the man as a salaried employee, you can start saving, and gradually as your savings grow you can invest your money in stocks, bonds and property and over time your investments will start generating an income of their own.

That’s great but you need to know what you’re doing and, if you have nothing now, it will take some time before you can start generating anything approaching a useful extra income.

Of course, should you have a large sum of money right now then this might be a solution but for most people it’s not really, which is why only around 3% of people make an income this way.

How-to-turn-your-yearly-income-into-your-monthly-income-2M3: Multiply your time with multiple sources of income:

Establishing multiple income streams is where you can start making serious money.

Even fewer people make an income this way, around 1%, but that has more to do with the fact that most people fail to recognize its potential.

Now let me make one thing clear, having multiple income streams does not mean working multiple jobs.

It means having income streams that will earn money for you even whilst you’re sleeping.

M3 is the income strategy that will help you earn far more than you earn now. Certainly, it will if you do it right.

Bob Proctor offers the example of Network Marketing (also known as Multi-Level Marketing) whereby not only do you sell products but you also create your own network of sellers which means when they sell you get a part of the commission generated on those sales.

The best network marketers have made a lot of money this way but it’s not the only answer to generate multiple streams of income.

The internet offers multiple ways of getting rich online nowadays.

For instance, you can use Amazon as a marketplace and sell products with fulfilment (delivery to the customer) handled by Amazon.

You can also generate commissions through affiliate marketing with Amazon, as well as others like Clickbank and Commission Junction (CJ). These can be great ways to make money whilst you sleep.

Blogging and Vlogging are other ways of producing income streams too.

There are numerous ways for the ambitious and determined. In fact, it’s never been easier for people prepared to put in the effort.

So listen to what Bob Proctor has to say and be inspired to take action now.

The Game of Money-Making:

Further Reading:

In the video, Bob Proctor makes reference to Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill.

Think and Grow Rich is a classic of the financial education genre.

Originally written in the 1930s but it’s still around today and still popular and very relevant.

It’s still around for a reason. It’s exceptional and definitely worth adding to your personal reference library. It’s a ‘must read’ if you want to master the game of money-making.I have my own copy and you can take a look at the book if you CLICK HERE.

Bob Proctor himself has also produced some excellent self-help books too and you can take a look at them if you CLICK HERE.

DISCLOSURE: This website is an Amazon affiliate. Should you click on any of the links included in the text above and you then make a purchase, you should be aware that this website will receive a small commission, at NO additional cost to you. These commissions serve only to cover the cost of maintaining this site. Your understanding is truly appreciated dear reader. Thank you.

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7 inspirational quotes about parenting

quotes-about-parentingToday, let’s explore some inspirational quotes about parenting.

Can there possibly be any activity in life that is more important than parenting? Personally, I don’t think so.

Yet it is often undervalued in the modern age, or so it seems. Children are the future, so surely they should be our priority?

It seems to me that far too many people regard parenting almost as an inconvenience, to be fitted in around careers, lifestyle and a burning desire for personal fulfilment.

It’s increasingly common now to see very young children accompanying adults on crowded commuter trains far too early in the morning, as parents rush to deposit them at a nursery or with a child-minder before the working day begins.

These little people will be the next generation. They’re the people who will carry the baton forward to build a better tomorrow. So how they’re brought up matters greatly, particularly in those all-important pre-school years, which are critical to their development.

Make your children your priority:

Is it really such a good idea to leave them with someone who couldn’t possibly have their best interests at heart in the way that every parent should? You can decide for yourself dear reader but I must say, I doubt it.

It’s my opinion that children, once we have them, should always be our priority over everything else.

Their best interests should always take precedence, surely? That’s easier said than done I know and inevitably there has to be some balance and compromise of course.

However there’s no more important job than being a parent and there’s no greater satisfaction than seeing that little bundle of joy turn into a decent, civilized and well-adjusted adult.

I have had many fine experiences in my life but being a parent has been the best of them all.

It hasn’t been easy of course and certainly, I’ve made plenty of mistakes along the way. However, the rewards have been well worth any sacrifices I’ve had to make.

Our children are our legacy:

Let us not forget that our children are the real legacy we give to the world. They’re the gift that will keep on giving if only in terms of the taxes they will pay throughout their lifetime.

Here are seven inspirational quotes about parenting to help you reflect on the importance of being a parent.

Quotes about parenting:

  1. When you hold your baby in your arms the first time and you think of all the things you can say and do to influence him [or her], it’s a tremendous responsibility. What you do with him [or her] can influence not only him [or her] but everyone he [or she] meets and not for a day or a month or a year but for time and eternity. ~Rose Kennedy
  2. To be a good father and mother requires that the parents defer many of their own needs and desires in favour of the needs of their children. As a consequence of this sacrifice, conscientious parents develop a nobility of character and learn to put into practice the selfless truths taught by the Savior himself. ~James E. Faust
  3. Every word, facial expression, gesture, or action on the part of a parent gives the child some message about self-worth. It is sad that so many parents don’t realize what messages they are sending. ~Virginia Satir
  4. There are times as a parent when you realize that your job is not to be the parent you always imagined you’d be, the parent you always wished you had. Your job is to be the parent your child needs, given the particulars of his or her own life and nature. ~Ayelet Waldman
  5. At the end of the day, the most overwhelming key to a child’s success is the positive involvement of parents. ~Jane D. Hull
  6. Don’t worry that children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you. ~Robert Fulghum
  7. It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men [or women]. ~Frederick Douglass

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7 inspirational quotes about fame

Quotes-about-FameDoes the idea of fame appeal to you, dear reader? That is being recognised and fêted wherever you go.

If it does then you’re not alone. Plenty of people share that aspiration.

However, before you chase fame it would be worth reflecting on its nature through today’s inspirational quotes about fame.

Many crave fame and many strive constantly to be famous, giving little or no thought to the price they’ll pay should they achieve any significant degree of fame.

Real fame implies universal recognition; being recognized literally wherever you go, anywhere in the world. Muhammad Ali, Elvis Presley, John Lennon and Nelson Mandela are all examples of people who were truly famous and would still be recognized anywhere.

To people with no experience of real fame, it might seem like a nice idea to think that wherever you go everyone will know you. However, the novelty will wear off soon enough, once you realize the impact it has on your privacy and your ability to go about your daily life in ways that other people take for granted.

Allow me to offer you an example. A few years ago I was in a crowded London coffee shop and who should sit opposite me? Non-other than the legendary Led Zeppelin guitarist Jimmy Page.

Now he was minding his own business trying to do the things we all do; relax with his beverage of choice and so on.

However being in the presence of a Rock music legend and icon is not something that was going to happen to me every day, so I couldn’t resist the temptation to invade his privacy with a few inane questions.

His response was polite and good-natured and I admired him all the more for his professional approach.

Nevertheless, it must have been a little bit irritating for him deep down I’m sure. Privately he was probably thinking, “Oh please, give me a break! I’m off duty and I just came in here for a quiet cup of coffee like everyone else.” For him, and many like him, that’s the price he continues to pay for his fame.

So if you’re chasing fame be prepared for the personal cost that will inevitably come with it. Fame might lead to riches for you but never forget that chains of gold are still chains.

You can do whatever you want but there is always a price to be paid somewhere.

Here are seven inspirational quotes about fame to reinforce today’s underlying message.

Quotes about fame:

  1. I always want to say to people who want to be rich and famous, ‘try being rich first’. See if that doesn’t cover most of it. There’s not much downside to being rich, other than paying taxes and having your relatives ask you for money. But when you become famous, you end up with a 24-hour job. ~Bill Murray
  2. The hardest thing about being famous is that people are always nice to you. You’re in a conversation and everybody’s agreeing with what you’re saying – even if you say something totally crazy. You need people who can tell you what you don’t want to hear. ~Al Pacino
  3. The strangest part about being famous is you don’t get to give first impressions anymore. Everyone already has an impression of you before you meet them. ~Kristen Stewart
  4. A celebrity is a person who works hard all of their life to become well known and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. ~Fred Allen
  5. We all want to be famous people and the moment we want to be something we are no longer free. Jiddu Krishnamurti
  6. Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate. ~Emily Dickinson
  7. I like to hide behind the characters I play. Despite the public perception, I am a very private person who has a hard time with the fame thing. ~Angelina Jolie

Please share these quotes with your friends:

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10 shocking quotes guaranteed to make you think

Shocking-QuotesThere are many categories of quotes. One category I’ve not explored until now is shocking quotes. That is quotes where the authors refer to something which to them is shocking.

Well, today I offer you 10 shocking quotes guaranteed to make you think.

These are 10 great quotes and I hope you find them all interesting and thought-provoking.

Shocking Quotes:

  1. The most shocking fact about war is that its victims and its instruments are individual human beings and that these individual beings are condemned by the monstrous conventions of politics to murder or be murdered in quarrels not their own. ~Aldous Huxley
  2. The writer of originality, unless dead, is always shocking and scandalous; novelty disturbs and repels. ~Simone de Beauvoir
  3. A shocking crime was committed on the unscrupulous initiative of few individuals, with the blessing of more and amid the passive acquiescence of all. ~Tacitus
  4. To me, the most shocking thing about grit is how little we know, how little science knows, about building it. Every day, parents and teachers ask me, ‘How do I build grit in kids? What do I do to teach kids a solid work ethic? How do I keep them motivated for the long run?’ The honest answer is, I don’t know. ~Angela Duckworth
  5. The way we allow children to be advertised to is shocking. Eating is a learned behaviour, and we’ve made these kids sitting ducks for all the bad messages about industrialized food. The fact that we allow that to go on is horrifying. ~Ruth Reichl
  6. The poverty one still sees in America today is more shocking to me than anything I have seen in Ethiopia or Calcutta or Manila, and has made me, as someone living in a society of great wealth and someone who’s never had to worry about the next meal, think seriously about what universal responsibility really means. ~Pico Iyer
  7. It’s very shocking, I think, for people caring for the dying to realise how unsaintly they feel, how much anger is mixed up with their grief. In fact, often I think the anger that they feel is a form of grief; it’s a kind of rage against what’s happening. ~Helen Garner
  8. It’s shocking to me that it’s easier to buy a gun at Wal-Mart than it is to buy my record. ~Marilyn Manson
  9. I’d rather get a good clean laugh with good material, than an easy laugh by swearing or shocking. That’s not clever or comedic, anybody can get a laugh that way, it’s too easy. ~Jim Dale
  10. I think it is shocking that 15- and 16-year-olds leave school unable to add up and with the reading ability of a four-year-old. ~Joan Collins

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7 inspirational quotes about religion to get you thinking

quotes-about-religionLooking for some quotes about religion, dear reader?

Faith can be the source of great comfort for people, of course, but it can also be a source of tension between people too.

As you’ll know only too well, there have been many wars over the years that have been driven by religious belief.

Religious principles:

However, if you look closely at the underlying principles of all the major world religions then, to me at least, essentially they’re all the same.

Just think about it for a moment, dear reader.

Surely, all the major world religions provide people with a moral framework and a philosophy by which they can live good, decent and productive lives?

In that sense, it’s fair to say that religion is an essential part of civilization, wouldn’t you agree?

Without a moral framework to which people adhere, then we would be left with nothing but barbarism in this world, surely?

Religion and culture:

Nevertheless, things start to get a bit more complicated when we consider the idea of culture because, of course, every religion underpins the culture of its adherents.

By definition, culture is simply the way things are done around here. And things are done differently wherever we go.

So, culture introduces differences between groups of people and of course, human beings often struggle to accept differences.

Our need for security:

That’s actually quite natural if you think about it.

You see, one of the most fundamental human needs is the need to feel secure. If we don’t feel secure, it can very quickly drain our energy and put us constantly on edge.

Human beings are programmed with a survival instinct and if we feel insecure we’re constantly on our guard, alert to every danger. This is linked to our ‘fight or flight‘ instinct.

The problem with differences between people is that they tend to make people feel insecure, which creates an obvious tension.

Coupled with the emotional bond people feel towards their religious identity, this can create significant tensions between groups of people.

The result has often been war and there have been numerous examples of this throughout the ages, and this continues to this day.

quotes-about-religion-2In reality, we’re all just people:

All too often we focus on our differences when, in fact, we’re all much more alike than we would care to admit.

Think about it. We eat, we sleep, we laugh, we cry; we all go to the toilet occasionally, we all seek prosperity and we want a better world for our children. If you travel to any place you’ll find we all have those things in common.

My point here is that, if only we could focus more on those things we all have in common, perhaps the world would be a much better place. Would you agree, dear reader? I hope so.

However, whilst you’re considering that question, here are seven inspirational quotes about religion to get you thinking.

Quotes about religion:

  1. I love you when you bow in your mosque, kneel in your temple, pray in your church. For you and I are sons of one religion, and it is the spirit. ~Khalil Gibran
  2. Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich. ~Napoleon Bonaparte
  3. I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use. ~Galileo Galilei
  4. It is wonderful how much time good people spend fighting the devil. If they would only expend the same amount of energy loving their fellow men, the devil would die in his own tracks of ennui. ~Helen Keller
  5. Prayer does not change God, but it changes him who prays. ~Soren Kierkegaard
  6. My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness. ~Dalai Lama
  7. Work out your own salvation. Do not depend on others. ~Buddha

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30 funny dating profile examples or how not to write one

funny-dating-profile-examplesIn days gone by the dating game was simple. You went to a dance on a Saturday night and, with a bit of luck, you met someone nice who was willing to see you again.

Obviously, the modern dating scene is very different. The age of the dating app makes the process difficult, insofar as you don’t get to meet someone unless they like what they see and what you have to say in your profile.

So you need a flattering photo, naturally, as well as a great sales pitch. And it really needs to be a sales pitch because you are actually trying to sell yourself to any potential dates who are checking out your profile.

A good sales pitch should highlight your unique selling proposition and the reasons why you’re a worthy date. Your words should be positive and scream “I’m a great catch, so grab me whilst I’m still available.” In short, your words should be a call to action.

Any decent salesperson could tell you this, so there’s nothing unique in what I’m saying here. You’d think it was obvious, wouldn’t you?

Following the close inspection of a few dating apps, I can tell you that there are plenty of people out there who haven’t helped themselves when they wrote their profiles.

However, whilst such people don’t necessarily do themselves any favours with their profiles, their words have the potential to make us all laugh.

So here are 30 funny dating profile examples that really made me smile. These are from real apps, albeit I wonder whether some were written tongue-in-cheek.

Funny dating profile examples (1-15):

  1. Miserable soul looking for love.
  2. Recovering alcoholic seeking soul mate.
  3. My life’s a car crash, can you make it better?
  4. I’ve just got the all-clear, so I’m ready for love again.
  5. Manic depressive looking for a nice girl to cheer him up.
  6. If you’ve got a fetish for body odour then I’m your man.
  7. I hate men but could you be the one to change my mind?
  8. So far, I’ve had 60 lovers at college, will you be my 61st?
  9. Looking for someone to pay my bills and take care of me.
  10. If you’ll be my meal ticket I’ll be your pampered princess.
  11. My relationships never work out but I’m willing to try again.
  12. Angry bitch looking for that special one to make his life hell.
  13. Don’t think of me as bald, think hairstyle that says minimalism.
  14. If you can handle a drama Queen then I could be the one for you.
  15. Served my sentence for assault and battery. Now looking for love.

Funny dating profile examples (16-30):

  1. If you’ll cook, clean and do my ironing then you’re the girl for me.
  2. I enjoy long walks and candlelit dinners and someone to pay the bill.
  3. Bad teeth, bad breath, body odour and acne but otherwise a great catch.
  4. Had my fun and I’ve got three kids to prove it. So what can you offer me?
  5. If you’re looking for a fixer-upper then I could be the challenge you need.
  6. As long as I always get my own way in every situation, I can be flexible.
  7. I hate everyone, so why should I like you? You’ll need a good story to tell.
  8. If you’re looking for a bird with a lot of troublesome baggage, then I’m your girl.
  9. My mother will always be my first priority but if that works for a girl like you, swipe right.
  10. If you’re looking for someone considerate, kind and caring then you’d better swipe left.
  11. I’ve got all the looks, charm and intelligence anyone could possibly want and I’m modest too.
  12. With three kids and one on the way, I’m looking for a father for them. Could you be the one?
  13. I can be difficult, jealous, sarcastic and moody. Could you be the one to make me happy?
  14. You could be my down-time, my spare-time, my part-time, and my sometime. Someone I turn to when I’ve nothing better to do.
  15. Bald man with no job, no money, no prospects and living with his parents is looking for a good woman with her own house and car. Could you be the one?

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If any of these funny dating profile examples made you smile then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

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25 brilliant one-liner quotes guaranteed to raise a smile

Brilliant One Liner QuotesHere are 25 brilliant one-liner quotes guaranteed to raise a smile. I loved them all and I’m confident you will too. Enjoy!

Brilliant one-liner quotes:

  1. Everything’s difficult before it’s easy.
  2. I do all my own stunts but never intentionally.
  3. Don’t trust children. They’re here to replace us.
  4. Your secret’s safe with me. I wasn’t even listening.
  5. If only we could invoice people for wasting our time.
  6. I’m going to stop putting things off, starting tomorrow.
  7. Work is just something I’m doing until I win the lottery.
  8. Sarcasm is just punching people in the face with words.
  9. The road to success has so many tempting parking spaces.
  10. You never know what you’ve got until you clean your room.
  11. Be like the postage stamp. Stick to a thing until you get there.
  12. I intended to behave but there were so many other options.
  13. If Cinderella’s shoe was such a perfect fit, why did it fall off?
  14. Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it’s only Tuesday.
  15. Reality is the leading cause of stress for those in touch with it.
  16. Revenge sounds so mean. I prefer to call it returning the favour.
  17. They say nothing’s impossible but I’ve been doing nothing all day.
  18. I’m still waiting for the wisdom I was assured would come with age.
  19. If one door opens when another closes, your house is probably haunted.
  20. You know it’s time to move on when the best part of your job is a chair that swivels.
  21. If you want your children to listen to you, try talking in a very low voice to someone else.
  22. If you’re going to get into trouble for hitting someone, you might as well hit them hard.
  23. People who can’t find time for rest and recreation will be forced to make time for illness, sooner or later.
  24. All I’m saying officer is that if you caught me then you must have been speeding too and no one’s above the law.
  25. When you get angry take a deep breath and count to 10. Then throw a punch at 8. Nobody expects that.

Brilliant One Liner QuotesEnjoyed these one-liners? Please share this post:

So dear reader, was this post amusing and worth a few minutes of your time?

If any of these one-liners made you smile then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

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24 wise quotes by famous people you’ll just love

quotes-by-famous-peopleIf you feel the need to be inspired then look no further. Here are 24 quotes by famous people that will have you reflecting on life, the universe and everything.

Maybe you’ll find something here that’ll leave you feeling truly inspired.

Most of all, if you love a good quote then there are some truly great ones here.

Probably some of the best you’ll read anywhere, in my personal opinion.

There may be quotes as good as these but it’s unlikely they’ll be bettered in my opinion.

Why not take a look through them all now?

They’re all still relevant today and as a result one of them might just fire the spark that will propel you down the road to success.

I think these quotes are definitely worth a little piece of your time. So, check them out now.

Quotes by famous people:

  1. Whatever you are, be a good one. ~Abraham Lincoln
  2. The future depends on what we do in the present. ~Mahatma Gandhi
  3. Have the courage to follow your heart and your intuition. They somehow know what you truly want to become. ~Steve Jobs
  4. Dream as if you’ll live forever. Live as if you’ll die today. ~James Dean
  5. If you don’t have a competitive advantage, don’t compete. ~Jack Welch
  6. The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do. ~Albert Einstein
  7. Well done is better than well said. ~Benjamin Franklin
  8. Don’t chase people. Be yourself; do your own thing; and work hard. The right people – the ones who really belong in your life – will come to you. And stay. ~Will Smith
  9. All our dreams come true if we have the courage to pursue them. ~Walt Disney
  10. Animals don’t hate and we’re supposed to be better than them. ~Elvis Presley
  11. Don’t feel stupid if you don’t like what everyone else pretends to love. ~Emma Watson
  12. Nowadays people know the price of everything but the value of nothing. ~Oscar Wilde
  13. The final forming of a person’s character lies in their own hands. ~Anne Frank
  14. Don’t waste your time with explanations. People only hear what they want to hear. ~Paulo Coelho
  15. If you were born poor, it’s not your mistake. But if you die poor it is your mistake. ~Bill Gates
  16. You cannot avoid peace by avoiding life. ~Virginia Woolf
  17. You’re only given one little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it. ~Robin Williams
  18. Have no fear of perfection, you’ll never reach it. ~Salvador Dali
  19. The quality of a person’s life is in direct proportion to their commitment to excellence, regardless of their chosen field of endeavour. ~Vince Lombardi
  20. Women are the largest untapped reservoir of talent in the world. ~Hillary Clinton
  21. I always wanted to be somebody but now I realize I should’ve been more specific. ~Lily Tomlin
  22. Never argue with a fool. Onlookers might not be able to tell the difference. ~Mark Twain
  23. I am not afraid. I was born to do this. ~Joan of Arc
  24. Success isn’t about how much money you make. It’s about the difference you make in people’s lives. ~Michelle Obama

Further Reading:

Maybe you should consider buying a book of quotes by famous people as a reference text for your desk because it’s always useful to have such a text readily to hand. When you want to emphasise a point, a suitable quote can be very powerful. Furthermore, it can be memorable too.

Having your own reference text will give you something to thumb through in your quieter moments when you can highlight some of your favourites for future use. Highlight anything especially relevant to your role or your business and you’ll be glad you did.

While there are plenty of good books of quotes around, one I can recommend is:-

Quotes on life, goal and Success from famous people around the world: Greatest and most powerful quotes ever used by leaders around the world:

Click on the link to take a look at it. I’ve got my own copy and I bought it from Amazon. You can too if you CLICK HERE

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So dear reader, was this post worth a little piece of your time? Did you enjoy reading it?

If you were impressed then please share it with your friends on social media.

People love quotes, so share now. You might just inspire a friend to take the next big step forward in life. When you share everyone wins.

And if you could share it I would be ever so grateful. You’d be helping a keen blogger reach a wider audience. Thank you.

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3 funny stories to tell your friends in the bar

Funny-Stories-to-tell-your-friendsDear reader, are you looking for some funny stories to tell your friends in the bar or at parties? If you want to be popular, always having a joke or two to tell your friends is a great way to achieve it.

So enjoy these funny jokes and feel free to pass them on.

Funny stories to tell your friends:

1. Pythagoras pun:

A medieval king was hunting in Africa, and he killed a lion, an elephant and a hippopotamus.

Returning to his kingdom, he awarded the hides from these animals to his three squires. In turn, these three squires became known as the Lion Squire, the Elephant Squire and the Hippo Squire.

As the years passed, the Lion Squire and the Elephant Squire became increasingly jealous of the Hippo Squire because he possessed, what to them was, the most treasured of the three hides.

So these two jealous squires hatched a plot to kill the Hippo Squire and divide the hippo skin between them.

Now the Lion Squire had ten sons and the Elephant Squire had six sons, whilst the Hippo Squire was childless. So the Lion Squire and the Elephant Squire sent their sixteen sons to kill the Hippo Squire and return with the prized hide.

However, in the ensuing battle, the Hippo Squire single-handedly managed to kill all sixteen of the sons.

Thus it is proved that the squire of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squires of the other two hides.

2. Yearning for a child:

Two women are sitting in their doctor’s waiting room and they begin discussing babies.

I’m desperate to have a baby,” said the first woman. “However I’m starting to think it’ll never happen.

I used to think like that,” said the other woman. “But then everything changed. That’s why I’m here. I’ll be having my baby in four months.

Wow!” said the first woman. “How did it all change for you?

I went to see a faith healer,” her companion responded.

 “Oh,” said the first woman. “My husband and I did try that but unfortunately it didn’t help at all.

Her pregnant companion smiled, then moved closer to her and whispered, “Next time, try going alone.

3. Hunting season:

A truck driver hauling a load of computers stops at a roadside diner in California for a coffee and some lunch.

As he enters the diner he notices a sign which says, NO COMPUTER NERDS ALLOWED IN HERE – ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK in large red letters.

As the trucker takes his seat at the counter, a stern-looking waitress looks at him suspiciously and then says, “Now listen here buddy, I can smell computers on you. I hope you’re not a nerd.

No, mam,” the trucker responds. “I’m hauling a consignment of computers today, so I guess some of their smell has rubbed off on me.”

Well that’s just fine then,” says the waitress, pouring him a cup of coffee.

As the trucker is taking his first sip of coffee, a skinny guy walks into the diner. He’s wearing black-rimmed glasses, held together with tape, and he’s got a row of pens and pencils in his breast pocket.

Without saying a word, the stern-looking waitress pulls a shotgun from behind the counter and she shoots this skinny guy dead.

The trucker is stunned by what he’s just witnessed. “What did you do that for?” he asks the waitress.

Don’t worry, sir,” the waitress responds. “Computer Nerds are in season right now because they’re over-populating Silicon Valley. You don’t even need a license to shoot them.

So, the trucker finishes his lunch and sets off to complete his delivery.

However, he’s just driving onto Interstate 5 when he has to serve violently to avoid a collision with another vehicle.

As he brings his truck back under control, the back door to his truck bursts open and computers spill all over the highway.

He stops his truck but before he can get around the back, there are computer nerds everywhere gathering up computers and running off with them.

Well, the trucker can’t afford to have his load stolen right from under his nose, so he grabs a shotgun he keeps in his cab and then he shoots several of the nerds dead.

Within seconds a Highway Patrol car has pulled up and the police officer jumps out and orders the trucker to stop shooting at once.

Why?” says the trucker. “I thought computer nerds were in season.”

They are,” says the cop, “but you’re not allowed to bait ‘em.”

Funny-Stories-to-tell-your-friends-2Please share this post with your friends:

So dear reader, did any of these funny stories to tell your friends actually make you smile? I do hope so.

Perhaps you feel that you could still use a good laugh?

If so, then please click on the links below. I’m confident that you’ll find plenty of smiles to amuse you.

And if you did enjoy what you’ve read today, please share this post with your friends on social media. When you share, everyone wins.

It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles. And you’ll be helping an aspiring blog to reach a wider audience.

Thank you.

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9 inspirational quotes you’ll absolutely love

9-inspirational-quotesLooking for some inspiration? Perhaps some quotes to inspire and energise you or something that will provide a little impact for the end of a presentation?

Here are nine great quotes which I hope will motivate you for the challenges you face in the days to come.

Inspirational quotes from some of the finest philosophical thinkers ever. They all left me inspired and I’m confident that you will love them, dear reader.

Inspirational Quotes:

  1. My mission in life is not merely to survive but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humour and some style. ~Maya Angelou
  2. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. ~Steve Jobs
  3. The best preparation for tomorrow is doing your best today. ~H. Jackson Brown Jr
  4. Happiness is not something you postpone for the future; it is something you design for the present. ~Jim Rohn
  5. Kind words do not cost much. They never blister the tongue or lips. They make other people good-natured. They also produce their own image on men’s souls, and a beautiful image it is. ~Blaise Pascal
  6. Don’t be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin. ~Grace Hansen
  7. A winner is someone who recognizes his God-given talents, works his tail off to develop them into skills and uses these skills to accomplish his goals. ~Larry Bird
  8. If you genuinely want something, don’t wait for it. Teach yourself to be impatient. ~Gurbaksh Chahal
  9. Develop success from failures. Discouragement and failure are two of the surest stepping stones to success. ~Dale Carnegie

And here’s a bonus quote. “If you’re thinking anyway then you might as well think big.

Please share these quotes with your friends:

If you found these quotes inspiring and interesting then please share this post on social media with your friends. When you share, everyone wins.

So go on, please share this post now. If you can do that for me, I will be ever so grateful.

Thank you.

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