Roy Sutton - Wit and Wisdom

5 short inspirational quotes that’ll really make you think

January 23, 2019 by Roy Sutton Leave a Comment

Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant. ~Robert Louis Stevenson

On days when I don’t work I am working on maintaining my image, just like an athlete. ~Linda Evangelista

I would perceive three years at university as a waste of time. I would have made £200,000 by then. ~Lord Sugar

You have to rule the money. Don’t let the money rule you. ~Fil Adams-Mercer

Marriage is an investment that pays dividends if you pay interest. ~Bob Monkhouse

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Why the importance of health can’t be overstated

January 22, 2019 by Roy Sutton Leave a Comment

Health is better than wealth. ~English Proverb

Accumulating money at the expense of your health is unwise, to say the least.

Yes we all want money and we’d all like plenty of it too. I understand that, as I’m sure you do dear reader. However if you’re in bad health you can’t really enjoy your little pot of gold, can you?

The problem is, work can often be stressful, particularly if you’re an entrepreneur running your own business. And stress takes its toll on your health.

As any entrepreneur will know, running your own business can be a 24/7 game.

You work very hard and you work long and often stressful hours too. It goes with the territory.

The payback is that you can get very rich this way.

However you must be very careful here. Building wealth is an admirable pursuit but not at the expense of your health. There must be some balance in your life. It can’t be all about chasing money.

Yes of course money can pay for better healthcare but so what? You can only truly enjoy your life if you are fully fit and healthy, surely?

There’s a lot to be said for financial freedom of course but being free from illness is always better than being rich.

Run your own business by all means. That can be an excellent career choice. And success, either as an entrepreneur or an employee for that matter, will need plenty of hard work. That’s a given dear reader.

However never work yourself so hard that it has a negative impact on your health.

There is no sense in making yourself ill. Damage done to your health can’t always be repaired.

So your priority should be to pay attention to your own wellbeing and make sure there is some balance between making money and staying fit and healthy.

Being the richest person in the graveyard has little going for it, does it?

That’s my opinion dear reader but what do you think? Have you got a cautionary tales you’d like to share with my readers? I’d love to hear from you.

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21 thought-provoking quotes about strength

January 21, 2019 by Roy Sutton Leave a Comment

Life can be overwhelming sometimes. We all experience pressures and problems. If that’s you then you’re not alone.

In times of trial it’s easy to feel you’re not strong enough to cope.

However it is through life’s challenges that character is formed.

If you can keep going through your most difficult times then you will become stronger as a result.

Remember this; you’re stronger than you think.

You have enormous strength within you, so dig deep. Keep going and never let anything beat you. You’re as good as anyone. If others can, then you can too.

And to help you keep it all in perspective here are 21 thought-provoking quotes about strength:-

Quotes about strength:

Make up your mind that no matter what comes your way, no matter how difficult, no matter how unfair, you will do more than simply survive. You will thrive in spite of it. ~Joel Osteen
Tough times never last but tough people do. ~Robert H. Schuller
There are better starters than me but I’m a strong finisher. ~Usain Bolt
Strength and growth come only through continuous effort and struggle. ~Napoleon Hill
Be very strong and be very methodical in your life if you want to be a champion. ~Alberto Juantorena
A single arrow is easily broken; a bundle of ten is not. ~Japanese Proverb
Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength. ~Arnold Schwarzenegger
All the adversity I’ve had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles have strengthened me. You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you. ~Walt Disney
There are two ways of exerting one’s strength: one is pushing down, the other is pulling up. ~Booker T. Washington
A truly strong person does not need the approval of others any more than a lion needs the approval of sheep. ~Vernon Howard
Little strokes fell great oaks. ~Ben Franklin
Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go. ~Hermann Hesse
We gain strength and courage and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face. We must do that which we think we cannot. ~Eleanor Roosevelt
Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will. ~Mahatma Gandhi
That which does not kill us makes us stronger. ~Friedrich Nietzsche
You have power over your mind; not outside events. Realize this and you will find strength. ~Marcus Aurelius
Sometimes you don’t realize your own strength until you come face to face with your greatest weakness. ~Susan Gale
Anyone can give up it’s the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that’s true strength. ~Author Unknown
Fall down seven times, get up eight. ~Japanese Proverb
The most beautiful people I’ve known are those who have known trials, have known struggles, have known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. ~Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
Strong people don’t put people down. They lift them up! ~Author Unknown

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Here’s how to make extra money

January 20, 2019 by Roy Sutton Leave a Comment

Where there’s muck there’s brass. ~English Proverb

If you’re short of money and you could use a little extra, what’s the best and quickest way to generate some cash?

How about making money from your old junk? All that clutter filling every available space in your home?

If you’re anything like me dear reader you’ll have accumulated plenty of junk and clutter over the years.

Old toys, bric-a-brac, old vinyl records, CDs and DVDs and so on. They can all be traded for money. Even old clothes can be traded. And if you have anything that offers some antique value then that’s even better.

A classic way to sell your junk and clutter is via a boot sale or yard sale of course but nowadays you can also sell using eBay, Craig’s List and similar websites. The internet makes it even easier to trade your old stuff for cash.

Believe it or not, even old, broken electronic gadgets can be traded to be used by people seeking spare parts which would otherwise be unavailable.

Old cars similarly can be mined for spares and therefore offer a means to make money too.

Then there’s scrap metal; there are plenty of people who make a decent living trading scrap metal.

Have you got a pile of old bricks at the back of your yard or garden?

You have? Then don’t just throw them away as someone might need bricks of that type and they could be prepared to pay you some cash for them.

There has always been money in old junk and clutter for those with a keen eye for hidden value. And there’s always someone, somewhere who might just need what you have but don’t want anymore.

Even dirt offers a money making opportunity. Many people have made fortunes by processing rubbish or waste materials.

Even if it can’t be sold it can be cleaned up for other people, hence there’s always money to be made somewhere.

For instance, houses where someone has sadly passed away will need clearing before they can be sold. Families are often willing to pay someone to clear it for them.

And don’t forget, trading in old junk can be turned into a profitable business.

For instance websites like MusicMagpie make good money trading old DVDs and CDs.

Then there are people who buy old books cheaply and sell them for a profit on Amazon.

And there are people with an eye for hidden value who will go round boot sales or yard sales looking for valuable items being sold cheaply. They will then buy them and resell them on eBay or at auction for profit.

For instance I saw a lady a few months ago who bought a vase for £1 at a boot sale and it was re-sold at auction for £800. Now that’s a decent profit.

As I said earlier, it’s never been easier to sell old junk and clutter on websites like eBay so there’s no excuse for not being able to make some extra cash.

Enterprising people will always find a way to make money and you can too.

Why not you? Why not now? Go for it!

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Here is some funny political satire with laughter guaranteed

January 19, 2019 by Roy Sutton

In the times in which we now live, it seems that intelligent political debate is something from a bygone age.

Perhaps it never really existed at all.

However the politically correct modern media has created a debate so lacking in intelligent and informed analysis that it has become completely pointless I think.

If you live in the United Kingdom dear reader, then an excellent example for me is the BBC’s Question Time. It may have a new host in Fiona Bruce but it’s still just a lot of hot air I think.

Essentially it’s just a carefully selected bunch of people with rigid views coupled with an inability to understand why others may think the way they do. And an unwillingness even to try.

I suppose that’s just the way it is nowadays.

Nevertheless it’s not a complete loss to us all because it does offer fertile ground for comedy and funny political satire.

So if like me you think that the BBC’s Question Time has become a mess of evidence-free assertions, class warfare, soundbites and smugness then you might just enjoy this comedy sketch from Harry Enfield and Paul Whitehouse.

It’s very funny and for me they have truly nailed the nature of what passes for modern political debate.

It made me laugh and I hope it makes you smile too.

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Money: Servant or Master?

January 18, 2019 by Roy Sutton

Money is a good servant but a bad master. ~English Proverb

If you’re lucky enough to have some money then it can serve you well.

If you’ve got your money working for you then it can make your life both pleasant and comfortable. With enough money you can have the lifestyle of your choice. So in that sense money is a very good servant.

However owing money is quite another matter.

If you owe money to other people then that debt can control your life in all sorts of unpleasant ways. Essentially debt enslaves you.

And that’s when money can become a very bad master.

Owing money can be stressful and it can really take its toll on your well-being

It’s true, you can’t always avoid debt. For instance few of us can afford to buy a home without a mortgage. That would be true for the purchase of a car too without a financing arrangement.

However you should never take on debt to fund discretionary spending. That’s unwise. If you can live without it then don’t buy it until you’ve got enough of your own money to pay for it.

Today’s mantra is simple. If you can avoid incurring debt, you should.

Well you should if you want to sleep soundly at night, that’s for sure.

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5 of the funniest jokes you’ll read today or any day

January 17, 2019 by Roy Sutton Leave a Comment

1. Fred and Ginger dining out:

Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers were dining out in a very swanky, five star New York City hotel and they’d both made a point of dressing for the occasion.

Ginger looked absolutely stunning is her ball gown and diamond tiara while Fred arrived in his trademark top hat, white tie and tails. They both looked like the million dollar movie stars they were.

All was going well with dinner until they got to dessert. While serving dessert the clumsy waiter managed to trip and Fred was showered from head to toe in treacle pudding.

“Oh, I’m most terribly sorry, Mr Astaire,” said the waiter.

Fred was not amused. “So you ought to be,” he said angrily.

Fred sat there fuming as the waiter tried his best to assist.

“Look at the state of me now,” said Fred. “I’ve pudding on my top hat; pudding on my white tie; and pudding on my tails.”

2. Church on Sunday:

Leaving church one Sunday Bernadette said to her husband Frank, “Do you think Mrs O’Shaughnessy is dying her hair?”

“To be honest Bernadette, I didn’t even notice Mrs O’Shaughnessy,” Frank responded.

They walked together quietly for a few moments and then Bernadette remarked, “Did you see that skirt Mrs Kilkenny was wearing? Now don’t tell me you thought that was appropriate for a 40 year old mother of six.”

“I’m afraid I didn’t really notice Mrs Kilkenny either,” said Frank.

“Huh!” Bernadette responded dismissively. “A lot of good it does you going to church on Sundays.”

3. The will reading:

A lawyer was reading out the will of a wealthy man to his family and everyone mentioned in the document.

“To my loving wife Mary, my rock and without whom my life would have been very different, I leave the mansion in Bel-Air and $20 million,” the lawyer read out loud.

He paused momentarily for his audience to digest this information and then he continued reading.

“To my darling daughter Louisa who supported me so much when my health began to fail and never once complained, I leave my business, my yacht and $1 million,” said the lawyer.

Again he paused momentarily to allow this information to sink in.

The lawyer then continued reading the final section of the will, “And to my brother Neville who argued with me constantly, hated my guts and thought I would never mention him in my will. Well, you were wrong. Hi Neville!”

4. Engine trouble:

While cruising at 35,000 feet, the aircraft suddenly shuddered violently.

One passenger looked out of the window and then shouted, “Oh my God! One of the engines has just blown up.”

The passengers were white with fear when moments later the aircraft was rocked by a second blast as an engine on the opposite side exploded.

Passengers started to panic and the cabin crew struggled to keep order.

However just then the Captain strode confidently from the cockpit and assured everyone that there was nothing about which they should be alarmed.

Reassured by the Captain’s calm manner, passengers returned to their seats and he coolly walked over to the aircraft’s door.

He then grabbed several packages from under the seats near the door and started handing them to the rest of the crew.

Crew members immediately fastened these packages to their backs.

One observant passengers said, “Hey, aren’t they parachutes?”

“Yes,” said the Captain.

“But you said there was no need to be alarmed,” the passenger responded.

“There isn’t,” replied the Captain as a third engine suddenly exploded. “We’re going to get help.”

5. Cashflow problem at the zoo:

A zoo was experiencing serious cashflow problems due to visitor numbers falling.

The zoo’s management got together to discuss how they could reverse the trend by introducing a major attraction.

Following the meeting the manager persuaded a visitor, who was a very big, stocky man, to take a job dressing up in a gorilla costume and masquerading as a great ape.

This deception worked well as the man really threw himself into the role with enthusiasm; devouring buckets of bananas, swinging from branches, pacing his cage menacingly, beating his chest and roaring loudly.

However one day he went a bit too far and he accidently fell into the lion’s enclosure next door.

Panicking, the bogus gorilla started shouting, “Help! Help!”

The lion let out a tremendous roar, then rushed at him. He put his paw on the bogus gorilla’s chest and growled, “Shut up buddy, or we’ll both lose our jobs!”

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Short Story Jokes: Here are 5 more to brighten your day

January 16, 2019 by Roy Sutton Leave a Comment

1. Gimme a beer:

A man walks into a bar in Downtown Manhattan and says to the bartender, “Gimme a beer before the problems start!“

The man then downs the beer in one before asking the bartender for another, once again saying, “Gimme a beer before the problems start!“

Naturally the bartender is a little wary of this guy but he pours him another beer nevertheless.

This goes on for a while, each time with the guy saying, “Gimme a beer before the problems start!“

After the fifth beer the bartender is really becoming bewildered by this guy’s approach, so he asks, “Hey buddy, when are you going to pay for all these beers?“

To which the guy responds, “This is where the problems start!“

2. Twin boys:

A young woman has twin boys but is forced sadly to give them up for adoption.

One boy is adopted by a family in Morocco and they name him Amal.

The other boy goes to a family in Spain and they name him Juan.

Many years later the woman receives a letter from Juan which includes a recent photograph of him.

As she’s looking at the photograph the woman says tearfully to her husband, “Oh, how I wish I had a photograph of Amal too.”

To which her husband responds, ”They’re twins. If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Amal.”

3. There’s always one:

A bus completely full with passengers crashes on an icy road and bursts into flames. Sadly everyone on the bus is killed instantly in the crash.

When they all arrive at the Pearly Gates the passengers are met by God, which is an unusual precedent but these were tragic circumstances. The situation is well above St Peter’s pay grade.

As the passengers form an orderly queue, God says, “Since you all died in such a tragic way, I’m here to grant each of you one wish before you enter the Kingdom of Heaven.“

The woman at the head of the line’s obviously concerned about her looks, and she says to God “I wish to be beautiful.“

God smiles, grants the wish and instantly she is truly beautiful.

The next woman hesitates momentarily but then she decides to wish for the same thing.

Once again God smiles, grants the wish and instantly she is also truly very beautiful.

Whilst all this is going on, a guy at the back of the queue starts to laugh.

Two more women, on seeing how beautiful their two fellow passengers have become, also wish to become beautiful.

God smiles again, their wishes are granted and they too are now very beautiful.

By now the guy at the end of the line is laughing even louder.

Nevertheless one after another, the deceased passengers all request the same wish.

However with each wish granted the guy at the end of the line, seems to laugh even harder.

Finally it’s this guy’s turn to request his wish when God asks, “My son, what’s your wish?”

To which the guy responds, “Make them all ugly again!“

Moral of the Story: There’s always someone determined to ruin it for everyone else.

4. The problem with getting old:

An 85-year-old man was asked by his doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical examination.

The doctor gave the man a jar and said, “Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.“

The next day the old man reappeared at the doctor’s office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as it had been on the previous day.

Naturally the doctor inquired as to what happened.

“Well doctor,” the old man explained, “it was like this. First I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, still nothing. Then I asked my wife. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, and still nothing. She even tried with her mouth, still nothing. We even called up Maggie, the lady next door. She tried with both hands, followed by her armpit. She even tried squeezing it between her knees. However still nothing.“

Looking shocked the doctor said, “You asked a neighbour?“

To which the old man replied, “Yes but none of us could get the lid off the jar.“

5. Swapping places:

One day, Einstein had to speak at an important science conference.

Now Einstein’s driver Tom looked remarkably like him, a fact of which Einstein was well aware.

In the car on the way to the conference Einstein said, “You know Tom, I’m sick of speaking at conferences. I just say the same things over and over!“

Tom smiled and said, “You’re right. I’ve attended all of them with you and even though I’m not a scientist, I’m sure I could give the conference in your place.“

“Now that’s a great idea Tom!” said Einstein. “Let’s switch places.“

So they immediately switch clothes, Einstein hands Tom his notes and when they arrive at the conference, Tom goes on stage and he starts giving the speech.

Meanwhile dressed in the driver’s uniform, Einstein sits at the side of the stage.

Unfortunately lurking in the audience is one scientist who is determined to impress everyone by asking a difficult question he hopes Einstein will not be able to answer.

When he gets his chance, this guy seizes the moment and interrupts the conference with his very difficult question.

It’s a real curved ball and the audience knows it. The whole room is silent, holding their breath, waiting for Einstein’s response. You could hear a pin drop.

However Tom has been around the block a few times and he wasn’t easily fazed.

He looked the guy dead in the eye, smiled at him and said, “Sir, to demonstrate how easy to answer your question is, I will let my driver reply to it for me.“

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21 most inspirational quotes about life to empower you to succeed

January 15, 2019 by Roy Sutton Leave a Comment

You only live once, but if you do it right once is enough. ~Mae West
One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it’s worth watching. ~Gerard Way
Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right. ~Henry Ford
The man who has confidence in himself gains the confidence of others. ~Hasidic Proverb
What you lack in talent can be made up with desire, hustle and giving 110% all the time. ~Don Zimmer
You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream. ~C.S. Lewis
The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing. ~Walt Disney
Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself. ~Harvey Fierstein
Accept responsibility for your life. Know that it is you who will get you where you want to go, no one else. ~Les Brown
Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Wishing is not enough; we must do. ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
The only way it gets better is when you get better as whatever you do. ~Jim Rohn
Challenges are what make life interesting and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful. ~Joshua J. Marine
Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough. ~Og Mandino
We may encounter many defeats but we must not be defeated. ~Maya Angelou
For every reason it’s not possible, there are hundreds of people who have faced the same circumstances and succeeded. ~Jack Canfield
Things work out best for those who make the best of how things work out. ~John Wooden
You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great. ~Zig Ziglar
There are no limits to what you can accomplish, except the limits you place on your own thinking. ~Brian Tracy
We generate fears while we sit. We overcome them by action. ~Dr Henry Link
If you are working on something that you really care about, you don’t have to be pushed. The vision pulls you. ~Steve Jobs
Today’s accomplishments were yesterday’s impossibilities. ~Robert H. Schuller

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21 thought-provoking quotes about love

January 14, 2019 by Roy Sutton Leave a Comment

We all need to feel loved and we all crave affection. That’s only natural.

However love is an emotion, so it’s more complex than we’d prefer. It’s complex enough to be beyond the comprehension of most people most of the time.

Mostly love is one of life’s great mysteries.

So here are 21 thought-provoking quotes about love to help you reflect on the great mystery of love.

If you’re in love then I hope it’s reciprocated.

If you’d like to be in love then I hope you find that special someone some time very soon. In the meantime enjoy today’s quotes.

Quotes about love:

Where there is love there is life. Mahatma Gandhi
Friends show their love in times of trouble, not in happiness. Euripides
Forgiveness is the final form of love. Reinhold Niebuhr
Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. Lao Tzu
Love is when the other person’s happiness is more important than your own. H. Jackson Brown Jr
The greatest healing therapy is friendship and love. Hubert H. Humphrey
Money can buy you a fine dog but only love can make him wag his tail. Kinky Friedman
The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. Theodore Hesburgh
The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. Audrey Hepburn
Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love. Mother Teresa
The most important thing in the world is family and love. John Wooden
Faith makes all things possible and love makes all things easy. Dwight L. Moody
Let the beauty of what you love be what you do. Rumi
If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they’re yours; if they don’t they never were. Richard Bach
Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses. Ann Landers
Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none. William Shakespeare
Love isn’t something you find. Love is something that finds you. Loretta Young
I love you the more in that I believe you had liked me for my own sake and for nothing else. John Keats
They invented hugs to let people know you love them without saying anything. Bil Keane
Never make a decision when you are upset, sad, jealous or in love. Mario Teguh
Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. Martin Luther King Jr

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2. Church on Sunday:

3. The will reading:

4. Engine trouble:

5. Cashflow problem at the zoo:

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1. Gimme a beer:

2. Twin boys:

3. There’s always one:

4. The problem with getting old:

5. Swapping places:

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