31 jokes for children that will make you smile too

Jokes for ChildrenLooking for some jokes for children, dear reader?

Like adults, children love to laugh and telling jokes to children is a great way to bond with them.

So today I’ve put together some very silly jokes that will really appeal to the children in your life, particularly younger children.

Take five minutes to enjoy these jokes and share them with the kids in your life.

Jokes for children:

  1. What did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt!
  2. Why don’t male ants sink? They’re buoy-ant.
  3. What’s orange and sounds like a carrot? A parrot.
  4. Where does Batman go to the toilet? The batroom.
  5. What do you call a pony with a cough? A little horse.
  6. How do oceans say hello to each other? They wave.
  7. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
  8. What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.
  9. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
  10. Why did the Oreo go to the dentist? Because he lost his filling.
  11. What do you call a train carrying bubblegum? A chew-chew train.
  12. Why did the M&M go to school? Because it wanted to be a Smartie.
  13. Why shouldn’t you trust atoms? They make up everything!
  14. What did one hat say to the other? You wait here. I’ll go on a head.
  15. Why can’t a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
  16. What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody knows.
  17. Why shouldn’t you trust stairs? They’re always up to something.
  18. How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles.
  19. What did one tomato say to the other? You go on ahead and I’ll ketchup.
  20. Why did the frog take the bus to work today? His car got toad away.
  21. Why is it annoying to eat next to basketball players? They dribble all the time.
  22. What do you call a rooster staring at a pile of lettuce? A chicken sees a salad.
  23. Why did it get so hot in the ballpark after the game? All of the fans left.
  24. Why did the nurse need a red pen at work? In case she needed to draw blood.
  25. What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between you and me, something smells.
  26. Why are ghosts, such bad liars? Because you can see right through them.
  27. Why aren’t koalas actually bears? Because they don’t have the koalafications.
  28. Did you hear about the two people who stole a calendar? They both got six months each.
  29. What breed of dog can jump higher than buildings? Any dog, because buildings can’t jump.
  30. How many times can you subtract 10 from 100? Once. The next time you would be subtracting 10 from 90.
  31. Did you hear about the dog that ate all the Scrabble tiles? He kept leaving little messages all over the house.

Please share this post with your friends:

So dear reader, was this post amusing and worth a few minutes of your time?

If any of these jokes for children made you smile then please share this post with your children, as well as your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

Then perhaps you’d like some more laughs? Then just click on the links below.

Other articles guaranteed to amuse you:

© Mann Island Media Limited 2020. All Rights Reserved.

29 hilarious jokes for 10-year-olds that’ll amuse adults too

Jokes for 10-year-oldsThere’s an inner child in all of us. If you love childish jokes then here are 29 hilarious jokes for 10-year-olds that I’m confident will amuse a lot of adults too.

Enjoy them all and then pass them on to the children in your life.

Jokes for 10-year-olds:

  1. What kind of exercise do lazy people do? Diddly-squats.
  2. What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye matey!
  3. Where do you manufacture average things? A satisfactory.
  4. How do you drown a hipster? Throw him in the mainstream.
  5. I broke my finger last week but, on the other hand, I’m fine.
  6. What sits at the bottom of the sea twitching? A nervous wreck.
  7. Why did the chicken go to the séance? To get to the other side.
  8. What do you call a dog that does magic tricks? A labracadabrador.
  9. What’s the best thing about Switzerland? Well, the flag’s a big plus.
  10. Why do we tell actors to break a leg? Because every play has a cast.
  11. No one is completely useless. We can always serve as a warning to others.
  12. Why don’t math majors go to parties? Because they don’t drink and derive.
  13. What do you call a line of rabbits hopping backwards? A receding hare-line.
  14. A parachute isn’t essential for skydiving, unless you want to go skydiving twice.
  15. Why should you never date a tennis player? Because love means nothing to them.
  16. You can’t lose a homing pigeon. If it doesn’t come home, it was only a pigeon.
  17. Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.
  18. Jokes for 10-year-oldsWhat do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn’t really matter because it’s not going to come to you anyway.
  19. My girlfriend accused me of being immature, so I told her she couldn’t play with my toys anymore.
  20. Women used to call me ugly until they realised how much I earn. Now they call me ugly and poor.
  21. What did Charles Dickens keep in his spice rack? The best of thymes; the worst of thymes.
  22. What did the bald man say when he was given a comb as a gift? Thanks, I’ll never part with that.”
  23. Verdana, Arial and Times New Roman walked into a bar and the bartender shouts, “Sorry but we don’t serve your type!”
  24. I saw a guy spill his Scrabble game all over the sidewalk and I asked him, “What’s the word on the street?”
  25. A Roman legionnaire walked into a bar, holds up two fingers and says to the bartender, “Five beers please.”
  26. A woman in labor suddenly started shouting, “Couldn’t, wouldn’t, shouldn’t, didn’t, can’t, won’t ………” The doctor smiled and said, “Don’t worry mam, they’re just contractions.”
  27. A woman says, “Help me, doctor, I’m addicted to Twitter.” The doctor smiled and said, “I’m sorry, I’m not following you.”
  28. The Preacher said to John, “Come forth and you’ll receive eternal life.” Unfortunately, John came fifth but he did win a year’s supply of Todd’s Snickerdoodles.
  29. A bear walks into a bar and says, “Give me a vodka and ………..Coke please.” The bartender says, “Why the big pause?” The bear shrugs and says, “I don’t know, I was born with them.”

Please share this post with your friends:

So dear reader, was this post amusing and worth a few minutes of your time?

If any of these jokes for 10-year-olds made you smile then please share this post with your children, as well as your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

Then perhaps you’d like some more laughs? Then just click on the links below.

Other articles guaranteed to amuse you:

© Mann Island Media Limited 2020. All Rights Reserved.

19 funny jokes to tell your friends and make them smile

Funny jokes to tell your friendsToday I thought you might appreciate some funny jokes to tell your friends.

If you can entertain people and tell a joke or two then you’ll always have friends. We all love to laugh, and people who are amusing are immediately likeable. So, if you want to be likeable, always have a few jokes in your back pocket.

If you want to make your friends smile, here are 19 funny jokes to tell your friends. Enjoy them all.

Funny jokes to tell your friends:

  1. Why did the bicycle fall over? It was too tired.
  2. Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools.
  3. What kind of tree will fit into your hand? A palm tree.
  4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
  5. How do you kill a circus clown? You go for the juggler.
  6. Where do cows go on a Saturday night? To the moo-vies.
  7. Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? He just pasta way.
  8. I used to work in a shoe recycling factory but it was sole destroying.
  9. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
  10. What did the traffic light say to the car? Don’t look, I’m about to change.
  11. I married Miss Right. It was only later that I realized her first name was Always.
  12. My wife told me that I must stop acting like a flamingo. So I had to put my foot down.
  13. What is grammar? It’s the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit.
  14. Why did the girl get hit by a bike every day? Because she was stuck in a vicious cycle.
  15. A Hot Dog walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, “I’m sorry but we don’t serve food here.”
  16. Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
  17. A thief broke into my house the other night searching for money. He woke me up, so I thought I might as well help him search for it, even though I wasn’t optimistic we’d find anything.
  18. A cop pulls a guy over and says, “Your eyes are awfully red, have you been drinking?” To which the guy responds, “Well, your eyes are awfully glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?”
  19. WIFE: Pack your bags, I’ve won the lottery. HUSBAND: Oh, wow! Are we going on holiday? WIFE: No! You’re leaving! I’ve won the lottery!

Please share this post with your friends:

So dear reader, were these jokes as good as you’d hoped? Were they worth a few minutes of your time?

I hope so. If they did make you smile then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

Then perhaps you’d like some more laughs? If so, just click on the links below.

Other articles guaranteed to amuse you:

© Mann Island Media Limited 2020. All Rights Reserved.

3 Really funny jokes I know you’ll just love

Really funny jokesIf you’re looking for some really funny jokes then I’ve got three good ones today. I’m confident you’ll love them all.

So takes a few moments to enjoy them and then please pass them on to your friends.

Really funny jokes:

1. A companion for Adam:

Adam was wandering around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely.

So he went to God and said, “Lord, I’m lonely. I’ve got no one to talk to.

God smiled at Adam and said, “I was thinking about giving you a companion called Woman.”

Woman?” Adam responded, quizzically.

Yes”, said God. “She’ll cook for you; clean for you; and she’ll wash your clothes. She’ll bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to help care for them. She’ll agree to whatever you say. She’ll never nag you and always admit when she’s wrong. She won’t bear a grudge and she’ll dress to please you. And of course she’ll make love to you whenever you want her to.

Wow”, said Adam. “That sounds fantastic. How much would a woman like that cost me?

An arm and a leg”, God replied.

Oh!”, said Adam. “What can I get for a rib?

2. Going away with the boss:

George rang his wife one day from the office and said, “Honey, I’ve been asked to go fishing on a lake up in Wyoming with my boss and a couple of his friends, and we’re leaving tonight. We’ll be away for the rest of the week.

Really?” his wife, Jane, responded.

Look, I know it’s a bit short notice,” George responded, “but this will be a great opportunity for me to schmooze with the boss and press for that promotion I’ve been chasing.

OK, I guess I’ll just have to live with it then,” said Jane.

I’ll need your help though,” said George. “I need you to pack enough clothes for the rest of the week and set out my rod and tackle box. I’ll stop by and collect them later. Oh, can you pack my new blue silk pyjamas too please?”

Jane thought his last request was a little suspicious but she did as he asked.

When George returned from his trip, Jane asked him how it had gone.

I’m a bit tired”, said George, “but otherwise it was a great trip.”

“Did you catch many fish?” Jane inquired.

“Oh, yes!” George responded. “The fish were really biting and I caught more than anyone else. But, how come you didn’t pack my new blue silk pyjamas like I asked?”

“I did, honey!” said Jane. “They were in your tackle box.”

3. The monkey and the lion:

It was a warm afternoon in the Serengeti National Park.

Two monkeys were sitting high in a tall tree watching a lion sleeping peacefully on the ground far below.

One of the monkeys said to the other, “Hey, I dare you to go down and give that lion a kick in the butt.

The other monkey was always up for a dare and so he agreed immediately.

Yes, I can do that”, said the monkey. And with that, he ran down the tree.

Once on the ground, he walked around the lion to check it was still asleep. Then he went to the rear of the lion and kicked it as hard as he could in the butt.

Woken suddenly, the lion roared, and the monkey started running as fast as he could.

The lion was angry and gave chase immediately.

Needless to say, the lion was fast and it didn’t take long for it to get within fifty yards of the monkey.

Realizing it needed to act fast, if it wasn’t to be eaten, the monkey picked up a newspaper that had been discarded by tourists.

The monkey then sat on a tree stump, hid behind the newspaper and pretended to read it.

Moments later, the lion arrived and said, “Excuse me, did you see a monkey pass this way?

Do you mean the one that kicked the lion in the butt?” the monkey responded.

Oh, no!” groaned the lion. “It’s not in the papers already, is it?

Please share this post with your friends:

So dear reader, were these really funny jokes amusing and worth a few minutes of your time?

I hope so. If they did make you smile then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

Then perhaps you’d like some more laughs? Then just click on the links below.

Other articles guaranteed to amuse you:

© Mann Island Media Limited 2020. All Rights Reserved.