30 Sarcastic quotes about life lessons to amuse you

08/05/2025 by

Today, I return to the theme of sarcasm because this theme always results in some positive feedback from readers. So here are some sarcastic quotes about life lessons, many of which I’m sure will resonate with readers.

They made me smile, and I hope they make you smile too.

Enjoy them all.

And please, feel free to pass them on.

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Sarcastic quotes about life lessons (1-15):

  1. Shhhh …… No one cares.
  2. I may forgive, but I never, ever forget.
  3. Apology accepted, but trust is denied.
  4. I’ll try to be nicer if you’ll try to be smarter.
  5. Some people are so poor that all they have is money.
  6. Don’t take yourself too seriously. No one else does.
  7. There’s no need to repeat yourself; I’m ignoring you.
  8. Let’s share. You take the grenade, and I’ll take the pin.
  9. I’m sorry, I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions.
  10. Oh, I’m sorry. I forgot; I only exist when you need something.
  11. I’m not heartless. I’ve just learned to use my heart less.
  12. Everything I like is either expensive, illegal, or won’t text me back.
  13. I’m sorry for those mean, awful, accurate things I’ve just said.
  14. You can laugh at anything, as long as it’s not happening to you.
  15. An apple a day will keep anyone away if you throw it hard enough.

Sarcastic quotes about life lessons (16-30):

  1. If I hurt your feelings by calling you stupid, I’m sorry, but I thought you knew.
  2. Of course, I can multitask. I can listen, ignore, and forget all at the same time.
  3. Common sense is like deodorant. Those most in need of it are least likely to possess it.
  4. Life’s just like an elevator. On the way up, sometimes you have to stop to let people off.
  5. If you had to pay me a dollar for every smart thing you said, you wouldn’t owe me a cent.
  6. You shouldn’t worry about what I’m doing. You should worry about why you’re worried about what I’m doing.
  7. If someone throws a rock at you, throw a flower back at them. But make sure it’s still in the pot.
  8. If me living my life my way bothers you, then you can always get yourself a life of your own.
  9. No matter who tries to teach you lessons about life, you won’t truly understand them until you have to go through them on your own.
  10. People are either on your side, by your side, or in your way. So choose them wisely.
  11. Never waste your time with people who only want you around when it fits their needs.
  12. I’ve reached the age where my brain’s gone from “I probably shouldn’t say that” to “What the hell, let’s go for it and see what happens.”
  13. Just when you think you know all the answers, life changes the questions.
  14. It wasn’t an act of revenge. I was simply returning the favour.
  15. There’s a difference between giving up and knowing when you’ve had enough.
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25 very corny jokes that’ll cheer you up guaranteed

08/02/2025 by

If you’ve been searching for some very corny jokes, this article is for you, dear reader.

Life can be stressful for everyone, so we all must laugh every day.

To help you with that, I’ve been collecting some more very corny jokes. These all made me smile, and I hope they will make you smile too.

Unfortunately, despite best efforts, it hasn’t been possible to identify the original authors of these very corny jokes, so for the moment they remain ‘Author Unknown.’

However, if you’re able to help with that, do let me know. My aim always is to acknowledge the work of others whenever possible.

So here they are, 25 very corny jokes that will cheer you up, guaranteed.

VERY CORNY JOKES
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Very Corny Jokes:

1. What do you call a midget psychic who just escaped from prison?

A small medium at large.

2. What’s the difference between a cat and a complex sentence?

A cat has claws at the end of its paws. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.

3. What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball against each other?

Juan on Juan.

4. Why did the jaguar eat the tightrope walker?

It was craving a well-balanced meal.

5. What did the big bucket say to the smaller one?

You’re looking a little pail.

6. What did one hat say to the other?

You stay here and I’ll go on ahead.

7. How does a duck buy lipstick?

She just puts it on her bill.

8. What do you do when you see a spaceman?

Park your car, man.

9. What do you do with epileptic lettuce?

Make a seizure salad.

10. Why was the poor guy selling yeast?

To raise some dough.

11. Who does a pharaoh talk to when he’s sad?

His mummy.

12. How much does a pirate pay for corn?

A buccaneer.

13. How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for Christmas?

He could feel his presents.

14. I just wrote a book on reverse psychology.

Do not read it!

15. Why can’t you trust an atom?

Because they make up literally everything.

16. What does a grape say after it’s stepped on?

Nothing. It just lets out a little wine.

17. What happens when a frog’s car breaks down?

It gets toad away.

18. How come oysters never donate to charity?

Because they’re shellfish.

19. Why did the pig leave the party early?

Because everyone thought he was a boar.

20. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil?

Because there’s no point.

21. A man got hit in the head with a can of Coke.

Thank goodness it was a soft drink.

22. Did you hear about the dog that loved eating garlic?

His bark was much worse than his bite.

23. What has four legs and flies?

A dead horse.

24. What’s the difference between a businessman and a warm dog?

The businessman wears a suit, the dog just pants.

25. What kind of monkey can fly?

A hot air baboon.

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27 Quotes by Nelson Mandela guaranteed to inspire you

07/31/2025 by

As he was one of the most influential people of the 20th century, I thought it would be interesting to explore some quotes by Nelson Mandela.

The late Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela was well-known as a South African anti-apartheid activist, political leader, and philanthropist who served as the president of South Africa from 1994 to 1999.

He was South Africa’s first Black head of state and the first elected in a fully representative democratic election.

He achieved his goals through his strength of character, an unshakeable conviction, and a willingness to forgive past wrongs. In his years as president, his approach was that of a forward-looking, consensus-oriented politician working for the greater good.

History will judge the degree to which he was successful, but undoubtedly, he was a man who made a major impact on history.

So, here are 27 quotes by Nelson Mandela that I think are guaranteed to inspire you.

Enjoy them all, and please feel free to pass them on.

Quotes-by-Nelson-Mandela
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Quotes by Nelson Mandela (1-10):

  1. Forget the past.
  2. There is no such thing as part freedom.
  3. It always seems impossible until it’s done.
  4. Let there be work, bread, water and salt for all.
  5. I dream of an Africa which is at peace with itself.
  6. Money won’t create success, the freedom to make it will.
  7. No country can really develop unless its citizens are educated.
  8. Courageous people do not fear forgiving, for the sake of peace.
  9. Only free men can negotiate. A prisoner cannot enter into contracts.
  10. A good head and a good heart are always a formidable combination.

Quotes by Nelson Mandela (11-20):

  1. To deny people their human rights is to challenge their very humanity.
  2. Let freedom reign. The sun never set on so glorious a human achievement.
  3. Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.
  4. After climbing a great hill, one only finds that there are many more hills to climb.
  5. It is wise to persuade people to do things and make them think it was their own idea.
  6. I stand here before you not as a prophet, but as a humble servant of you, the people.
  7. There can be no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way in which it treats its children.
  8. As long as poverty, injustice and gross inequality persist in our world, none of us can truly rest.
  9. I was not a messiah, but an ordinary man who had become a leader because of extraordinary circumstances.
  10. If you want to make peace with your enemy, you have to work with your enemy. Then he becomes your partner.

Quotes by Nelson Mandela (21-27):

  1. There is no passion to be found in playing small, in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.
  2. There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered.
  3. For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.
  4. If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart.
  5. I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.
  6. There is no easy walk to freedom anywhere, and many of us will have to pass through the valley of the shadow of death again and again before we reach the mountaintop of our desires.
  7. Without education, your children can never really meet the challenges they will face. So it’s very important to give children education and explain that they should play a role for their country.
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25 Quotes by Confucius to guide you in life

07/30/2025 by

Today, I am exploring quotes by Confucius.

Confucius was a Chinese teacher, editor, politician, and philosopher, believed to have been born around 551 BC.

Even though we cannot truly be sure whether he genuinely existed at all, it is as a philosopher that he’s best remembered.

Those words of wisdom, credited to Confucius, continue to enlighten us, and his quotes read like a guide to life.

So today, I offer you 25 quotes by Confucius, which will help shed a little light on this otherwise dark world in which we live.

Read Confucius over and over, and in time you will be enlightened, I am sure.

So take a few moments and let these quotes by Confucius be your guide.

Quotes by Confucius
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Quotes by Confucius (1-10):

  1. Have no friends who are not your equal.
  2. Wherever you go, go with all your heart.
  3. Silence is a true friend who never betrays.
  4. Forget injuries, but never forget kindnesses.
  5. Humility is the solid foundation of all virtues.
  6. Respect yourself, and others will respect you.
  7. When anger rises, think of the consequences.
  8. Study the past if you are to define the future.
  9. Never give a sword to a man who can’t dance.
  10. Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it.

Quotes by Confucius (11-20):

  1. Life is simple, but we insist on making it complicated.
  2. Real knowledge is to know the extent of one’s ignorance.
  3. A superior man is modest in speech but exceeds in actions.
  4. What you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others.
  5. Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.
  6. It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.
  7. I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.
  8. To know what you know and what you do not know is true knowledge.
  9. Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.
  10. He who speaks without modesty will find it difficult to make his words good.

Quotes by Confucius (21-25):

  1. When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don’t adjust the goals, adjust the action steps.
  2. Success depends upon previous preparation, and without such preparation, there is sure to be failure.
  3. The will to win, the desire to succeed, and the urge to reach your full potential, are the keys that will unlock the door to personal excellence.
  4. By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest.
  5. It is easy to hate, and it is difficult to love. This is how the whole scheme of things works. All good things are difficult to achieve; and bad things are very easy to get.
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21 Amusing Quotes by David Brent

07/25/2025 by

If Ricky Gervais’s monologue at the Golden Globes 2020 made you cringe, then take a look at some quotes by his alter ego, David Brent. These are even more memorable.

Who could forget the cringe-worthy David Brent from the original UK version of the situation comedy The Office?

When it first hit our screens The Office was original and very funny.

Here are 21 quotes by David Brent to remind you of just what a clever comic creation he was at the time.

These quotes made me smile, and I hope they make you smile too, dear reader.

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21 Quotes by David Brent (1-10):

  1. Accept that some days you’re the pigeon and some days you’re the statue.
  2. A good idea is a good idea forever.
  3. There may be no ‘I’ in team but there’s a ‘ME’ if you look hard enough.
  4. A problem shared is a problem halved, so is your problem really yours or just half of someone else’s?
  5. Avoid employing unlucky people. Throw half of the pile of CVs in the bin without reading them.
  6. I thought I could see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it was just some b****** with a torch bringing me more work.
  7. If at first, you don’t succeed, remove all evidence that you ever tried.
  8. If work was so good, the rich would have kept more of it for themselves.
  9. You have to be 100% behind someone before you can stab them in the back.
  10. If you can keep your head when all around you have lost theirs, then you probably haven’t understood the seriousness of the situation. 
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21 Quotes by David Brent (11-21):

  1. If you’re gonna be late, then be late and not just 2 minutes, make it an hour and enjoy your breakfast.
  2. Make good use of your cylindrical filing unit, the one you mainly keep under your desk.
  3. Never do today that which will become someone else’s responsibility tomorrow.
  4. Remember that age and treachery will always triumph over youth and ability.
  5. Statistics are like a lamp post to a drunken man, more for leaning on than illumination.
  6. What does a squirrel do in the summer? It buries nuts. Why? Cos then in wintertime he’s got something to eat, and he won’t die. So, collecting nuts in the summer is worthwhile work. Every task you do at work think, would a squirrel do that? Think squirrels. Think nuts.
  7. I’m a friend first. Boss second. Probably entertainer third.
  8. If you want the rainbow, you’ve got to put up with the rain. Do you know which philosopher said that? Dolly Parton! And people say she’s just a pair of t***.
  9. David Brent is refreshingly laid back for a man with such responsibility.
  10. On a more positive note, the good news is, I’ve been promoted ……. you’re still thinking about the bad news, aren’t you?
  11. I couldn’t come out and go, I’ve got some bad news and some irrelevant news.

Video:

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21 thought-provoking quotes about strength

07/23/2025 by

Today, I am exploring quotes about strength.

Life can be overwhelming sometimes, can’t it? We all experience pressure and problems. If that’s you, dear reader, then you’re not alone.

In times of trial, it’s easy to feel like you’re not strong enough to cope.

However, it is through life’s challenges that character is forged.

If you can keep going through your most difficult times, then you’ll become stronger as a result.

Remember this: you’re a lot stronger than you think.

You have enormous strength within you, so dig deep.

Keep going, and never let anything beat you.

You’re as good as anyone. If others can, so can you.

And to help you keep it all in perspective, here are 21 thought-provoking quotes about strength:

Quotes about strength
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Quotes about strength:

  1. Make up your mind that no matter what comes your way, no matter how difficult, no matter how unfair, you will do more than simply survive. You will thrive in spite of it. ~Joel Osteen
  2. Tough times never last, but tough people do. ~Robert H. Schuller
  3. There are better starters than me but I’m a strong finisher. ~Usain Bolt
  4. Strength and growth come only through continuous effort and struggle. ~Napoleon Hill
  5. Be very strong and be very methodical in your life if you want to be a champion. ~Alberto Juantorena
  6. A single arrow is easily broken; a bundle of ten is not. ~Japanese Proverb
  7. Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength. ~Arnold Schwarzenegger
  8. All the adversity I’ve had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles have strengthened me. You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you. ~Walt Disney
  9. There are two ways of exerting one’s strength: one is pushing down, the other is pulling up. ~Booker T. Washington
  10. A truly strong person does not need the approval of others any more than a lion needs the approval of sheep. ~Vernon Howard
  11. Little strokes fell great oaks. ~Ben Franklin
  12. Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go. ~Hermann Hesse
  13. We gain strength and courage and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face. We must do that which we think we cannot. ~Eleanor Roosevelt
  14. Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will. ~Mahatma Gandhi
  15. That which does not kill us makes us stronger. ~Friedrich Nietzsche
  16. You have power over your mind; not outside events. Realize this and you will find strength. ~Marcus Aurelius
  17. Sometimes you don’t realize your own strength until you come face to face with your greatest weakness. ~Susan Gale
  18. Anyone can give up it’s the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that’s true strength. ~Author Unknown
  19. Fall down seven times, get up eight. ~Japanese Proverb
  20. The most beautiful people I’ve known are those who have known trials, have known struggles, have known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. ~Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
  21. Strong people don’t put people down. They lift them up! ~Author Unknown

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The Value of Time: Life’s most precious resource

07/19/2025 by

Today, I am exploring the value of time.

Life’s most precious resource:

Let me ask you a question first. What is life’s most precious resource, dear reader?

Now, many readers might say money.

However, think about it for a second.

Certainly, money is a vital resource, particularly in the modern era. And for most people, there’s never quite enough.

Nevertheless, you can always get more money. You can start a business; you can earn a bigger salary; you could win the lottery; you could even sell some of your possessions, if necessary.

So, in that sense, money is not a limited resource. You can get more of it.

Life's most precious resource
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The importance of time:

If money’s not the most precious resource, how about time?

We often fail to appreciate the significance of time, and most of us can be quite wasteful of it, at least occasionally.

When you think about it, time is a very limited resource. We’re all limited to just 168 hours per week, whether we like it or not.

None of us can get more hours than that each week, however wealthy we may be. We cannot buy more time, can we?

And we’re only on this Earth for a finite amount of time, too.

Precious commodity:

So if we can’t get any more, time must be a very precious commodity. It must be our most precious commodity.

It’s the only commodity we cannot get more of, so it’s got to be more precious than anything else, surely?

Therefore, if time is so precious, we must use it wisely, surely?

We must guard it carefully. And we must never allow other people to waste our time, certainly if we aim to achieve anything of significance in life.

Never give your time away cheaply:

Just because someone asks for a piece of your time, that does not imply an obligation on you to give it to them automatically.

People are entitled to make such a request, of course. However, it’s perfectly reasonable for you to think about it carefully before deciding whether to agree to their request.

And it’s perfectly reasonable for you to say NO if you don’t consider what is being asked of you the best use of your time.

If a NO is the most appropriate response from your standpoint, then so be it.

Remember, it’s your time:

NO is the most powerful time management tool you have at your disposal.

It’s perfectly legitimate for you to have your own aims and your own agenda, and your time should be allocated in such a way that you can achieve whatever it is you’re trying to achieve. So never be afraid to say NO.

Always be polite, of course, but guard your time very carefully.

And remember this: it’s your time, and you decide how best to use it.

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25 complaints about holidays that’ll make you smile

07/17/2025 by

Today, I am exploring complaints about holidays.

The problem with travel is that it can fail to meet our expectations. So, naturally, travel agents regularly get their fair share of complaints about holidays from their customers.

Here are 25 examples of complaints received by a well-known British travel agent, all of which certainly made me smile.

So, please take a few moments to enjoy them all.

And please feel free to pass them on.

COMPLAINTS ABOUT HOLIDAYS
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Complaints about holidays (1-10):

  1. No one told us there would be fish in the sea. The children were scared.
  2. The beach was too sandy. We had to clean everything when we returned to our room.
  3. We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi drivers, as they were all Spaniards.
  4. Although the brochure said that there was a fully equipped kitchen, there was no egg slicer in the drawers.
  5. On my holiday to India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don’t like spicy food.
  6. They should not allow topless sunbathing on the beach. It was very distracting for my husband, who just wanted to relax.
  7. We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your brochure shows the sand as white, but it was more like pale yellow.
  8. I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local convenience store does not sell proper British biscuits like custard creams or ginger nuts.
  9. It’s lazy for the local shopkeepers in Puerto Vallarta to close in the afternoons. I often needed to buy things during siesta time. This should be banned.
  10. We booked an excursion to a water park, but no one told us we had to bring our swimsuits and towels. We assumed it would be included in the price.

Complaints about holidays (11-20):

  1. A mosquito bit me. The brochure did not mention mosquitoes.
  2. We had to line up outside to catch the boat, and there was no air-conditioning.
  3. It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel.
  4. On our holiday in Rome, the tourist attractions were all full of tourists, so I couldn’t enjoy them properly.
  5. I compared the size of our one-bedroom suite to our friends’ three-bedroom, and ours was significantly smaller.
  6. It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England. It took the Americans only three hours to get home. This seems unfair.
  7. The brochure stated: ‘No hairdressers at the resort.’ We’re trainee hairdressers, and we think they knew and made us wait longer for service.
  8. When we were in Spain, there were too many Spanish people there. The receptionist spoke Spanish, and the food was Spanish. No one told us that there would be so many foreigners.
  9. The roads were uneven and bumpy, so we could not read the local guidebook during the bus ride to the resort. Because of this, we were unaware of many things that would have made our holiday more fun.
  10. My fiancé and I requested twin beds when we booked, but instead, we were placed in a room with a king bed. We now hold you responsible and want to be reimbursed for the fact that I became pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked.

Complaints about holidays (21-25):

  1. I was disappointed with my holiday in Thailand. It was like taking a vacation in a foreign country.
  2. When we arrived in Beirut, we were told that the local tap water wasn’t safe to drink, so we had to buy bottled water.
  3. The street signs in Tokyo were all in Japanese. As English is the international language, surely, they should all be in English?
  4. The local customs and traditions seemed very strange to us, and that made us feel very uncomfortable. Your brochure didn’t mention that local culture might be different from our own.
  5. I was surprised to find that the local television channels in Latvia didn’t show the latest episodes of Coronation Street and EastEnders. Being away for two weeks means I’ve now missed a big part of the current storylines.
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Put a smile on someone else’s face, and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

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50 sarcastic remarks that say, ‘Don’t mess with me!’

07/15/2025 by

If you admire clever put-downs or sharp, sarcastic remarks, then here are 50 you might like to add to your quiver full of arrows.

These can be your ammunition for another day when someone tries to put one over on you.

We all need a little ammunition for those occasions when we need to send a message to someone that says, ‘Don’t mess with me!‘

And of course, we all need a good laugh too. These should also help with that. Enjoy them all.

And please feel free to pass them on.

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Sarcastic Remarks:

  1. I’ve met some pricks in my time, but you really are the full cactus.
  2. Tact is for people who lack the wit to respond with sarcasm.
  3. Leave sarcasm and insults to the professionals. You’re an amateur.
  4. I’m guessing you’re not a rocket scientist by profession?
  5. You’re mistaking me for someone who cares what you think.
  6. You’re about as useful as a condom with a hole in it.
  7. You’re wearing that shirt for a bet, surely?
  8. There’s more intelligent life at the bottom of ponds.
  9. The mirror doesn’t lie, but lucky for you, it doesn’t laugh either.
  10. If your aim was to impress me, you’ve failed.
  11. Does your carer know you’re out on your own?
  12. Did I ask for your opinion? I think not.
  13. If I act like I don’t care, that’s because I don’t.
  14. If it’s loyalty you want, get a dog.
  15. If only closed minds came with closed mouths.
  16. That’s an eye-catching dress, mam. Where did you buy it? Walmart?
  17. You’re living proof that even dumb people can find work.
  18. Has anyone ever told you that you’re a sandwich short of a picnic?
  19. You’re the result of four billion years of evolution. Try to act like it.
  20. That was about as interesting as watching paint dry.
  21. I’ve had more fun having a root canal treatment.
  22. You’re not the sharpest knife in the drawer, are you?
  23. Did you still find it funny when it happened to you?
  24. You’re not ugly. Unattractive, definitely, but not really ugly.
  25. You have all the charm of a cobra in a bad mood.
  26. In another age, you’d have been burned at the stake.
  27. Normally, I pretend to like you, but today I really can’t be bothered.
  28. Violence may not solve anything, but it might make me feel better.
  29. Bad planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.
  30. Sure, I’ll help you out, buddy. The same way you came in.
  31. Don’t take yourself too seriously; no one else does.
  32. If I promise to miss you, will you go away?
  33. You sound better with your mouth closed.
  34. Boy, haven’t you been smacked with the ugly stick?
  35. I’m sorry. What language are you speaking? It sounds like bullsh**.
  36. You have every right to express an opinion, sir, and I have every right to ignore it.
  37. Do I think you’re stupid? Well, I was wondering how you manage to tie your shoelaces.
  38. You do realize that a line of work consistent with your weaknesses is not an ideal career choice?
  39. I know I asked for a rare steak, but a good vet could have this one back on its feet again and grazing in the pasture.
  40. I’ve met stingy people before, but you wouldn’t give anyone the snot from your nose.
  41. When they ask me to complete the customer satisfaction survey, I’ll be sure to mention that you’re a complete asshole.
  42. I’ve met plenty of stupid people in my time, but you’re taking stupidity to an entirely new level not seen before.
  43. Which part of ‘I’m not interested’ is too difficult for you to understand?
  44. I could insult you, but it would be cruel to pick on someone so lacking in intellect that they cannot defend themselves.
  45. If that dress you’re wearing is part of a get-noticed strategy, mam, it’s working, I can assure you.
  46. When I look at you, I can see that the lights are on, but no one’s home.
  47. I didn’t realize someone could be annoying at first sight until now!
  48. If I wrote down every intelligent thought you’d ever had, it wouldn’t amount to a single tweet
  49. I didn’t say I hated you, but I’d certainly unplug your life support if my phone needed charging.
  50. You’re a low-paid gatekeeper in a cheap suit and a polyester tie, getting off on your little bit of power. Enjoy the moment, buddy. You know you’re nothing, and so does everyone else.
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Enjoyed these sarcastic remarks? Please share them:

So, dear reader, was this post amusing and worth a few minutes of your time?

If any of these sarcastic remarks made you smile, then please share them with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face, and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So, please share them now.

Then perhaps you’d like some more laughs? Then click on the links below.

Thank you for your support.

Other articles that might appeal to you:

© Mann Island Media Limited 2025. All rights reserved.

Filed Under: Sarcasm Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , ,

31 sarcasm examples that’ll really make you smile

07/11/2025 by

Today, I am exploring sarcasm examples.

Now, some people are uncomfortable with the use of sarcasm. However, I think it can be one of the most effective means of communication. So I’ve been collecting some more sarcasm examples.

So, without further ado, here are 31 sarcasm examples that you can add to your ammunition stockpile. I think they might make you smile, too.

Enjoy them all. And please feel free to pass them on.

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Sarcasm examples:

  1. Are you talking to me or chewing a brick?
  2. You’ve got a face only a mother could love.
  3. You’re about as pleasant as colonic irrigation.
  4. Why don’t you go sit on the rough end of a pineapple?
  5. If I appear to be disinterested, that’s because I am.
  6. I didn’t ask for your advice, so why would you assume I need it?
  7. Dressed like that, I’m guessing you’re off to a loud shirt party?
  8. What’s the matter with you? You’ve got a face on you like a wet weekend.
  9. Am I a bitch or just a girl who’s looking after her interests and takes no crap from anyone? You may not like it, but it works for me. So suck it up, buttercup.
  10. I appreciate you giving me this opportunity for a lengthy exchange of ideas, but I’m busy. So please go away.
  11. I get it that life has been unfair to you and that you’re not happy, but why is that my problem?
  12. When you say ad hoc, does that mean I can do it as necessary, or were you trying to impress me with your knowledge of Latin?
  13. When you suggest ‘I’m just biased,’ does that mean deep down you think I may have a point, but you don’t want to admit it?
  14. Listen, buddy, I can sell you a drink, but I can’t offer you solutions to your problems. I’m a bartender, not a psychotherapist.
  15. You keep saying that money’s not important, but I’d love to see how long you can live without it.
  16. What have you done to your hair? It looks like it’s been cut with a knife and fork.
  17. You know you’re old when you receive a welcome letter from AARP, which serves only to remind you that you’re not quite dead yet.
  18. It may be moderately challenging, but let’s face it, it’s not rocket science, is it?
  19. That’s an interesting idea. Why don’t you put it in the suggestion box, and I’ll be sure to ignore it?
  20. So life was so much better back in your day? Well, whoop-dee-doo. The rest of us are so pleased for you, NOT.
  21. It was a joke. We used to tell them to each other before everyone was so easily offended.
  22. Just because you work hard, you shouldn’t assume your efforts will be appreciated. What did you expect? Applause?
  23. You do realize that feeling that everyone’s out to get you may not just be a feeling?
  24. Yes, I received your email, and I ignored it like every other message I have in my inbox. I’ve actually got work to do.
  25. Referring to yourself as a professional is not, for me, a guarantee that you’ll have any significant level of competence.
  26. One day, you’ll realise that behaving like a total dick was not a good idea, and it doesn’t impress anyone.
  27. ‘Have a nice day’ is something you say, but in my experience, rarely is it something you mean.
  28. You’re not old. Chronologically challenged, yes! But there’s a bit more life in you yet.
  29. If you don’t feel that this job is worthy of your talents, then you can always quit and go spend more time with your ego.
  30. If you want to lose weight, love, you could try shaving your legs.
  31. Being a perfectionist will make you the worst kind of boss in the world. On the upside, it’ll also make you the best kind of sexual partner. So it’s not all bad.
Make Money

Please share this post:

So, dear reader, was this post amusing and worth a few minutes of your time?

If any of these sarcasm examples made you smile, then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face, and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

Then perhaps you’d like some more laughs? Then click on the links below.

Thank you for your support.

Other articles that might appeal to you:

© Mann Island Media Limited 2025. All rights reserved.

Filed Under: Sarcasm Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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