6 funny long jokes that’ll make you smile

06/20/2023 by

FUNNY LONG JOKEsIf you like telling your friends funny long jokes and you’re looking for some ammunition then here are six good ones that should make your friends smile.

Funny long jokes:

1. A face at the window:

Bill and Bobby Joe were leaving their local bar one night after a session of heavy drinking.

They’re both staggering, and they fall into Bobby Joe’s station wagon and he starts it up.

With the engine running and Bobby Joe still fumbling around in the driver’s seat, suddenly the face of an old man appears in the window on the passenger side, and he’s tapping lightly on the window.

It is pitch black out there and being taken completely by surprise, naturally this spooks Bill. So in reaction, he screams, “Oh my God, there’s a ghost!”

Well, Bill’s remark spooks Bobby Joe too, so he puts his foot down and the station wagon begins to accelerate.

Bobby Joe can see the speedometer needle moving and yet, the face of the old man remains there in the window.

So Bill lowers the window and says, “What do you want, old man?”

“You got any tobacco?” the old man asks, softly.

Bill offers him a cigarette, and then shouts, “Step on the gas, Bobby Joe, and let’s get the hell out of here!”

Well, the speedometer on the station wagon is approaching 80, and Bobby Joe looks at it and says, “We’ll be fine, he can’t catch us now.”

Suddenly they hear the tapping on the window again, and it’s the same old man.

So, Bill rolls down the window once again and says, “What is it now?”

“Have you got a light?” the old man asks, politely.

Bill lights the man’s cigarette and then shouts, “Bobby Joe, step on it!”

So, Bobby Joe presses the accelerator hard down to the floor and watches as the speedometer exceeds 100 miles per hour.

Once again Bobby Joe remarks, “We’ll be fine Bill, he can’t catch us now.”

Well, a minute or two passes, and they hear that tapping on the window again.

Bill lowers the window and screams, “What the hell is it now, old man?”

“Your wheels are still spinning in the mud,” the old man responds softly, pointing to the rear of the vehicle.

2. The stakeout:

Rookie police officer, Jim Smith, has been assigned the role of staking out a local bar one night watching out for potential DUI violations.

As the evening draws to a close, he watches as one young man staggers out of the bar and tries his keys in five different cars before finding his own.

The young man fumbles for a few minutes, as Officer Smith keeps an Eagle eye on him, and eventually, the car door opens and the young man falls into the driver’s seat.

Officer Smith watches the young man like a hawk, waiting to pounce, as other patrons start leaving the bar and driving off in their cars.

Eventually, the young man gets his car started and attempts to drive away.

At that point, Officer Smith makes his move and pulls him over.

“Sir, I must caution you that I suspect you’re driving under the influence and I need you to blow into this breathalyzer for me, please,” Officer Smith says politely but very firmly.

The young man does as requested and then hands the breathalyzer back to Officer Smith for checking.

Officer Smith looks closely at the blood-alcohol content score and it measures zero.

Officer Smith is puzzled by this outcome and demands to know what’s going on.

The young man smiles and says, “Sir, tonight it was my turn as designated decoy.”

3. The black bear:

A big black bear walks into a bar and orders a beer.

“I’m sorry,” the bartender responds, “but we don’t serve bears beer in this bar. That’s our policy.“

Well, the bear is not amused. It rears back a little and then growls, “I don’t care about your policy. I’m a bear and I want a beer.”

The bartender remains calm, smiles, and then replies, “I get it, you’re not happy, but as I said, we don’t serve beer to bears in this bar.”

The bear stands up at full height, raises its massive paws and howls, “I’m a bear and I want a beer! And if I don’t get me a beer now, I will eat one of your customers.“

The bartender remains unfazed by the situation. He just smiles and says, “Listen, buddy, do whatever you gotta do but I won’t be serving you a beer.”

So, the bear walks down to the end of the bar grabs a gin-soaked, drunken lady sitting at the counter, and greedily eats her.

Once he’s finished eating her, he returns to face the bartender, looks him in the eye and declares, “Right, you’ve seen what I can do. I’m a bear, and I want a beer.“

The bartender is still unfazed.

“Listen, buddy,” he says, “I’ve told you already, we don’t serve beer to bears in this bar. And for that matter, we don’t serve drug addicts either.”

“DRUG ADDICT!” the bear roars, “What the hell are you talking about?”

The bartender looks the bear in the eye and says, “That was a bar-bitch-you-ate.”

4. The challenge:

Jerry was an Iron Man champion who also owned a bar just off the Las Vegas Strip.

Everyone in town knew that Jerry was the strongest man around and knowing that visitors to Las Vegas liked a bet, he used that to his advantage in attracting people into his bar.

On the counter, there was a big sign headlined Challenge Jerry. In the small print, it explained the bet was that anyone who could beat Jerry in a strongman challenge could win $1,000. The cost of the bet was $10.

In the challenge, Jerry would squeeze the juice from an orange into a glass. Once Jerry had squeezed the life out of the orange, challengers had to take the orange and see if they could squeeze any more juice from it.

Over the years truck drivers, lumberjacks, weightlifters and all sorts of tough guys had tried to beat Jerry in this challenge but, so far, no one had ever got the better of him.

One day a small, thin, weak-looking, middle-aged man with thinning hair and heavy-rimmed spectacles walked into the bar, slapped a $10 bill on the counter and said that he was willing to take up the challenge.

Everyone in the bar started laughing at the idea that this weak-looking, little man would have any chance of beating Jerry and walking out with the $1,000.

Jerry smiled at the man, picked up the $10 and said, “OK Buddy, you’ve got yourself a bet.”

He then picks up one of California’s finest and squeezes the juice out of it until the glass is almost full. What remained of the orange was then handed to the challenger.

The little man focused momentarily and then started squeezing as hard as he could with both hands. To everyone’s amazement, within seconds, half a dozen drops of juice dripped into the glass.

Jerry congratulated the man on his success and handed him $1,000.

“I’m impressed,” said Jerry. “What do you do for a living, buddy? I’m guessing you must be a lumberjack?”

“Oh no,” the man responded. “I work for the IRS.”

5. The DEA Agent:

Steve McShane is an agent with the Drug Enforcement Agency based in Arizona and he’s had a tip-off that a farmer near Scottsdale is growing marijuana in one of his fields.

So McShane shows up at the farm one day unannounced and says to the farmer, “Hey buddy, I’m from the DEA and I’ve got a warrant to search your farm, as we suspect you of growing illegal narcotics.”

“Really!” the farmer says a little surprised, “I don’t know where you got that idea, but I guess I’ve got no choice but to let you do whatever you’ve got to do. However, I must warn you DO NOT go in the backfield.”

Well, McShane is a little put out by this last comment, so he pulls out his badge and says to the farmer, “Now listen old man, do you see this badge? Take a good look at it, buddy. This badge says I’m with the DEA. And with this badge, I’ve got access to all areas. Do you hear what I’m sayin’? No one or nothing can stop me. You got that?”

“Yes sir!” said the farmer.

With that Steve McShane heads straight for the backfield believing the farmer’s comment was an attempt to deflect him from looking in the place where the marijuana is being grown.

Within minutes the farmer sees the DEA man running as though his life depended on it. And it did, as McShane was being chased by the biggest, meanest, fastest bull you’ve ever seen.

As the bull closes on him, McShane screams at the farmer for help.

“SHOW HIM YOUR BADGE!” shouts the farmer. “Just tell him it gives you access to all areas.”

6. Spelling Test:

Beryl’s married life had not been a happy one, and sadly one day, she passed away.

Suddenly, she finds herself standing at the Pearly Gates in front of St Peter.

“Hello, Beryl,” St Peter says, warmly. “You’ve done your best to lead a good and decent life, I know, so all I need is for you to spell one word correctly and you’ll be admitted to the kingdom of Heaven.”

“Right!” said Beryl. “And what word do I need to spell?”

“That word is love, Beryl,” St Peter responds. “Can you spell it for me?”

“Yes, of course,” said Beryl. “It’s L O V E.”

“Well done,” St Peter responds, “and welcome to the kingdom of Heaven.”

Beryl quickly settles into life in Heaven and finds a new sense of purpose in helping St Peter will his many duties.

St Peter begins to rely on her so much that one day, when he’s very busy, he asks her to deputize for him at the Pearly Gates, checking new arrivals.

As luck would have it, Beryl’s husband appears at the Pearly Gates whilst she’s on duty.

“Oh, it’s you,” says Beryl. “Well, I’ve got to tell you that you won’t be admitted to Heaven unless you can spell one word correctly for me. And you only get one chance to spell it perfectly.”

“Right!” says her husband. “And what word do I need to spell for you?”

“Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateapokaiwhenuakitanatahu,” Beryl responds, smiling brightly.

If you enjoyed these long jokes, please share them:

FUNNY LONG JOKESSo dear reader, was this post amusing and worth a few minutes of your time?

If any of these funny long jokes made you smile then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

Then perhaps you’d like more laughs? Then just click on the links below.

More fun you might enjoy:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2023. All Rights Reserved.

Filed Under: Funny Jokes Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

4 funny jokes that won’t offend but will amuse you

06/17/2023 by

FUNNY JOKES that won't offendToday I offer you some very funny jokes that won’t offend anyone but they’ll definitely amuse you and your friends dear reader, of that I’m confident.

So take a moment to enjoy these three little gems. And of course, feel free to pass them on.

Funny jokes that won’t offend:

1. Father Murphy:

Father Murphy looked uneasy as he attempted to greet the wedding guests at the entrance to St Bernadette’s Church.

He doesn’t say much and he looks uncomfortable but the congregation know him to be a bit shy.

As the bride arrives, Father Murphy makes his way to the altar and, as the couple approach, he gives the best speech anyone has ever heard.

Not only is it an excellent speech, full of wisdom and insight but he appears to be confident and he has everyone rolling on the floor laughing.

After the couple has made their vows and everyone is leaving, Father Murphy steps down from the altar and once again he becomes tongue-tied and shy and barely manages to say a word to anyone.

Feeling a little sorry for him, the groom says, “I hope you don’t mind me asking Father, but why are you so shy now? You seemed like a different person when you were up there giving that speech earlier.“

“I know“, Father Murphy responded, “but that was just my altar ego.”

2. Running out of gas:

Gerry is driving down the freeway when he runs out of gas.

He’s sitting there in the driver’s seat wondering what to do next when a bee flies in through his window.

“What seems to be your problem?” asks the bee.

“I’ve run out of gas“, Gerry replies.

“That’s unfortunate”, says the bee. “However if you wait here I can help you.”

The bee then flies off, only to return minutes later with an entire swarm of bees. They all fly into his gas tank, leaving Gerry wondering exactly what’s going on.

After a few minutes, the swarm flies off and the bee says to Gerry, “Try it now.”

Gerry turns his ignition key and his car fires into action immediately.

“Wow!” Gerry exclaims. “What did you put in the gas tank?“

The bee smiles and says, “BP, of course.“

3. Wisdom of the Ancients:

FUNNY JOKES that won't offendThe Native Americans on a remote reservation in Wyoming asked their new chief, Akecheta, whether the winter ahead was going to be mild or cold.

Now Chief Akecheta was a modern man, educated in a university, but he hadn’t been taught the old ways and the wisdom of his ancestors.

He looked into the sky, but he was unable to read the signs as to whether the winter would be cold or not.

Naturally, he didn’t want to lose credibility with the tribe so, to save face and be on the safe side, he just told them that the winter was going to be cold and that they should probably start gathering firewood to be prepared.

Now he may not have learned the ancient secrets, but Chief Akecheta was a wise and practical man. So, once he was on his own, he phoned the National Weather Service and asked them for their winter forecast.

“Well sir,” said the meteorologist, “our forecast suggests that it’s going to be quite cold.”

Feeling more confident now, Chief Akecheta went back to his people and told them to collect even more firewood to be prepared.

A week later, he called the National Weather Service again.

“Does it still look like it is going to be very cold this winter?” he asked the meteorologist.

“Yes sir,” said the meteorologist. “It could be even colder than we first thought.”

So once again, Chief Akecheta went back to his people, and he ordered them to collect every scrap of firewood they could find.

Two weeks later, Chief Akecheta phoned the National Weather Service again.

“Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?” he asked the meteorologist.

“Yes sir,” said the meteorologist. “The signs are that it’s going to be one of the coldest winters we’ve ever seen.”

“How can you be so sure?” asked Chief Akecheta.

“Well sir,” the meteorologist responded, “the Native American tribe up the road has been collecting a crazy amount of firewood recently.“

4. The lion enclosure:

FUNNY JOKES that won't offendIt’s Jim’s first day on the job as a trainee zookeeper at London Zoo.

His boss wants to ease him into his duties gently so Jim’s given the fish to look after.

Unfortunately, Jim gets all the fish food mixed up with the chemicals and he manages to kill all the fish.

Worried that the mistake might cost him his job, Jim decides it might be easier to cover it up by gathering all the now-dead fish together and throwing them into the lion enclosure when no one’s looking.

After lunch, Jim’s boss asks him to feed the chimpanzees.

Unfortunately once again by mistake Jim gives them all the wrong food and manages to kill them off too.

Again he’s worried that he could lose the job he only started that very morning. So he decides on another cover-up. Once again Jim dumps all the bodies into the lion enclosure whilst no one’s looking.

Well, two major mistakes in one day were a little embarrassing, so in the late afternoon, Jim decides to sneak off early before he could do anything else wrong.

Sadly another disaster was waiting to happen.

When reversing his car he managed to back it into the apiary and in doing so crushed all the bees.

Left with little option Jim executed yet another cover-up. He scooped up the crushed bees and again through them all into the lion enclosure.

Jim then jumps into his car and heads for home.

The next day, the zoo has a new arrival. It’s a new lion transferred from Whipsnade Zoo.

“What’s it like here then?” the new lion asks the others in the lion enclosure.

“Not bad“, one replies, “there’s less space here than at Whipsnade but the food’s good. Yesterday we had fish, chimps and mushy bees.”

Please share this post with your friends:

So dear reader, did these funny jokes that won’t offend anyone make you laugh? I hope so.

However, there are plenty more laughs for you if you click on the links below. You’ll find plenty of smiles to amuse you.

And if you’ve enjoyed what you’ve read today then please share this post with your friends on social media. When you share, everyone wins. And it’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

If you could share this post now, then I’d be ever so grateful. and you’ll be helping a keen blogger reach a wider audience.

Thank you.

More fun you might enjoy:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2023. All Rights Reserved.

Filed Under: Funny Jokes Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

A poem about faith to get you thinking

06/16/2023 by

POEM ABOUT FAITHToday, dear reader, I offer you an original poem about faith. Faith is often dismissed as being no longer relevant. I think that’s a mistake.

Consider for a moment the profound role of religious faith in our lives.

I’m sure you know that life is complex, and it’s filled with challenges and the emotional strain of dealing with other people.

Faith is like a lighthouse in the storm. It guides us and helps us avoid crashing onto the rocks. It’s a beacon of light that shines through the darkest nights, reminding us that even amid turmoil, there is a way forward.

Faith gives us hope and comfort, even in our darkest hours when everything seems bleak. It’s the assurance that no matter how tough today might be, there’s a purpose, a plan, and brighter days ahead.

In times of trial, faith is an asset that can make all the difference.

Now there are many religious faiths and I think they all serve the same purpose. Put simply, they help us cope with life. Whichever one you believe is entirely up to you. As long as it helps you.

Without further ado, here’s today’s original poem about faith.

Poem about faith:

Poem About Faith

Please share this poem:

If you found this poem interesting then please share them on social media with your friends.

When you share, everyone wins.

So go on, please share this post now.

If can you do that for me, I’ll be ever so grateful and you’ll be helping a keen blogger reach a wider audience.

Thank you for your support.

Articles that might also appeal to you:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2023. All Rights Reserved.

Filed Under: Poetry Tagged With: , , , , , ,

35 that’s what she said jokes to raise a smile

06/15/2023 by

Thats What She Said JokesToday I thought it might be amusing to explore some ‘That’s What She Said Jokes’.

This form of humour revolves around innuendo and double entendre.

Yes, it’s a bit silly and suggestive but it’s innocent and fun too, as it reflects the nature of human interaction and the way we find humour in the absurd. And, let’s face it, much of what passes for physical interaction between people can seem a little absurd when you think about it.

As with all humour, appropriateness and effectiveness depend largely on the audience and the context. So, I hope my audience today will appreciate this form of humour.

If for some reason this humour is not for you then I’ll try to offer you something more appropriate next time around.

In the meantime, for those who enjoy innuendo and double entendre, here are 35 That’s What She Said Jokes to brighten your day.

That’s What She Said Jokes (1-10):

  1. That’s big. That’s what she said.
  2. It looks horrible! That’s what she said.
  3. I think it’s stuck. That’s what she said.
  4. I’ve seen it all now. That’s what she said.
  5. You can’t be serious. That’s what she said.
  6. I can’t get a grip on it. That’s what she said.
  7. That’s too much for me. That’s what she said.
  8. Stop fiddling with them! That’s what she said.
  9. Wow, it’s quite a handful. That’s what she said.
  10. I don’t like the look of that. That’s what she said.

That’s What She Said Jokes (11-20):

  1. You’re going to love these! That’s what she said.
  2. Keep it to yourself, please. That’s what she said.
  3. Well, that was disappointing. That’s what she said.
  4. Not now, I’ve got a headache. That’s what she said.
  5. Surely, you’re having a laugh. That’s what she said.
  6. This is harder than I expected. That’s what she said.
  7. I’ve never seen one that small. That’s what she said.
  8. I’ve not seen one like that before. That’s what she said.
  9. I didn’t think it would get this big. That’s what she said.
  10. That’s not a game I’m willing to play. That’s what she said.

That’s What She Said Jokes (21-35):

  1. I can’t keep holding it up like this. That’s what she said.
  2. I’ve never done it this way before. That’s what she said.
  3. It was over quicker than I thought. That’s what she said.
  4. You’ll get better with more practice. That’s what she said.
  5. Let’s take it out and see how it looks. That’s what she said.
  6. I’m going to need two hands for this. That’s what she said.
  7. It’s not as big as I thought it would be. That’s what she said.
  8. You don’t get many of them to the pound. That’s what she said.
  9. I love you dear but not enough to try that. That’s what she said.
  10. If you think I’m doing that you can forget it. That’s what she said.
  11. Goodness, this one’s got its own personality. That’s what she said.
  12. You’re unlikely to find a pair bigger than these? That’s what she said.
  13. As experiences go, that wasn’t much to write home about. That’s what she said.
  14. There’s an easy way and a hard way. Let’s do it the easy way. That’s what she said.
  15. It’ll take more than a skinny latte and a blueberry muffin to impress me. That’s what she said.

Please share this post:

If any of these ‘That’s What She Said Jokes’ made you smile then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. So, it’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share now.

Then perhaps you’d like more laughs? Just click on the links below.

Thank you for your support.

More fun you might enjoy:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2023. All Rights Reserved.

Filed Under: Funny Jokes Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Poem about success

06/13/2023 by

Poem about SUCCESSIf it’s a poem about success you’re seeking, dear reader, I have an original one for you today.

It’s a poem that reflects my own personal philosophy with respect to success. That is, you have to make it happen yourself. No one ever became successful without putting in the hard yards first. But everyone can enjoy success if they really want it and they’re prepared to work hard for it.

Anyway, take a look and see what you think.

In addition to a poem about success, I also have an original poem about the past for you.

Far too many people assume that because their past has been less than perfect that will prevent them from achieving success in the future.

That’s simply not true.

You can start from where you are, use what you’ve got, and build the future you want.

It can be done and people do. So can you!

Poem about success:

Poem about Success

Poem about the past:

Poem about the past

Please share these poems with your friends:

If you found these poems interesting then please share them on social media with your friends.

When you share, everyone wins.

So go on, please share this post now.

If can you do that for me, I’ll be ever so grateful and you’ll be helping a keen blogger reach a wider audience.

Thank you for your support.

Articles that might also appeal to you:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2023. All Rights Reserved.

Filed Under: Poetry Tagged With: , , , , , ,

Poem about character

06/12/2023 by

Poem about CHARACTERIf you’re looking for an original poem about character then you’ve come to the right place, dear reader. In fact today, I can offer you two closely related poems.

Occasionally, I think reflecting on the people we are and how others may see us can be useful. A little introspection helps with our self-awareness, I think. So, I’ve been doing a little bit of self-analysis recently out of which came these two poems.

The first one, called Character, reflects how I’d like to be judged.

The second poem, called Just Some Guy, reflects how I see myself.

Now don’t assume I’m putting myself down in any way because I’m not. I’m very confident in my own ability and I know how to add value to the lives of others. However, equally, I know that we’re all just people and we shouldn’t assume that we are in some way better than others.

Everyone has their place in this world and their own contribution to make. And everyone contributing to the lives of others deserves to be treated with respect.

Anyway, I thought I’d share these poems with you dear reader and you can decide on their merits, or otherwise.

If they do appeal to you, please feel free to share them.

1. Poem About Character:

Poem About Character

2. Poem About Self:

Poem about self

Please share this poem with your friends:

If you found these poems interesting then please share them on social media with your friends.

When you share, everyone wins.

So go on, please share this post now.

If can you do that for me, I’ll be ever so grateful and you’ll be helping a keen blogger reach a wider audience.

Thank you for your support.

Articles that might also appeal to you:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2023. All Rights Reserved.

Filed Under: Poetry Tagged With: , , , , , , , , ,

33 Why Did jokes that are all full groan

06/11/2023 by

WHY DID JOKESIf you like Why Did jokes then I have 33 for you today, dear reader, and I promise you that they’re all full groan.

Everyone a play on words designed to tickle your funny bone.

So, relax, take an unofficial break, and enjoy them all.

And if any of them did seriously tickly you then please, feel free to pass them on to your friends.

Why Did Jokes (1-11):

  1. Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed.
  2. Why did the computer go on a diet? Too many cookies.
  3. Why did the belt go to jail? For holding up a pair of pants.
  4. Why did the computer go to the dentist? It had Bluetooth.
  5. Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing.
  6. Why did the computer go to the doctor? Because it had a virus.
  7. Why did the banana go on a road trip? The a-peel of adventure.
  8. Why did the pen refuse to write? Because it felt that way ink-lined.
  9. Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well.
  10. Why did the banana go to university? The a-peel of being well-educated.
  11. Why did the tomato go out with a prune? Because it couldn’t find a date.

Why Did Jokes (12-22):

  1. Why did the lamp go to school? Because it wanted to shine amongst its peers.
  2. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems to solve.
  3. Why did the computer go to the party? Because it wanted to dance the byte away.
  4. Why did the banana go to the therapist? Because it had a split personality.
  5. Why did the photographer start a blog? Because he wanted more exposure.
  6. Why did the tomato leave the comedy club? Because all the jokes were tasteless.
  7. Why did the tomato go on a night out? Because it wanted to paint the town red.
  8. Why did the pen become a poet? Because it had an ink-credible way with words.
  9. Why did the zombie win the dance competition? Because it had some killer moves.
  10. Why did the scarecrow become a DJ? Because it had some a-maize-ing tracks to spin.
  11. Why did the bicycle become a stand-up comedian? Because it was wheel-y funny.

Why Did Jokes (23-33):

  1. Why did the chicken go to the séance? To get to the other side.
  2. Why did the computer become a musician? Because it had great keyboard skills.
  3. Why did the tomato go to the party? To ketchup with friends and relish the good times.
  4. Why did the tomato turn purple? Because it was trying to ketchup with the latest trends.
  5. Why did the math student go into therapy? Because he had a lot of unresolved problems.
  6. Why did the scarecrow become a tour guide? Because it knew all the best fields and gardens.
  7. Why did the bicycle become a chef? Because it loved whipping up wheely delicious meals.
  8. Why did the teacher bring a ladder to the classroom? To help his students reach new heights.
  9. Why did the banana break up with the orange? Because they didn’t really a-peel to each other.
  10. Why did the scarecrow become a detective? Because it had exceptional ability in solving corn-undrums.
  11. Why did the math book become friends with the calculator? Because they both had problems to solve.

Please share this post:

If any of these Why Did jokes made you smile then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. So, it’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share now.

Then perhaps you’d like more laughs? Just click on the links below.

Thank you for your support.

More fun you might enjoy:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2023. All Rights Reserved.

Filed Under: Funny Jokes Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

30 knock knock jokes that are corny but fun

06/10/2023 by

30 KNOCK KNOCK JOKESDo you enjoy ‘knock knock jokes’, dear reader?

Yes, they’re corny I know. However, they’re fun too. Clever wordplay is always fun and certainly, I find it amusing.

So, here are 30 knock knock jokes which I hope you will enjoy.

Grab a coffee, take an unofficial break, relax, and enjoy the smiles.

And when you’ve read them all, feel free to pass them on to your friends.

Knock Knock Jokes (1-10):

  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Boo
  • Boo who?
  • Don’t cry, it’s just a joke!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Wendy
  • Wendy who?
  • Wendy wind blows, the cradle will rock!
  • Knock, knock.
  • Who’s there?
  • Honeybee
  • Honeybee who?
  • Honeybee a dear and get the door, please!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Dishes
  • Dishes who?
  • Dishes the police, open up!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Alpaca
  • Alpaca who?
  • Alpaca the suitcase, you load up the car!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Mikey
  • Mikey who?
  • Mikey doesn’t fit in the keyhole; can you open the door, please?
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Olive
  • Olive who?
  • Olive you and I always will!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Wooden shoe
  • Wooden shoe who?
  • Wooden shoe like to hear another joke?
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Cow says
  • Cow says who?
  • No silly, cow says moooo!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Cash
  • Cash who?
  • No thanks, I prefer peanuts!

Knock Knock Jokes (11-20):

  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Icy
  • Icy who?
  • Icy you but you can’t see me!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Lettuce
  • Lettuce who?
  • Lettuce in, it’s freezing out here!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Kenya
  • Kenya who?
  • Kenya guess who I am?
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Arthur
  • Arthur who?
  • Arthur any more jokes left?
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Ivor
  • Ivor who?
  • Ivor question to ask you.
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Nicholas
  • Nicholas who?
  • Nicholas women shouldn’t climb trees.
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Luke
  • Luke who?
  • Luke through the keyhole and you’ll see!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Howard
  • Howard who?
  • Howard you like a big hug?
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Noah
  • Noah who?
  • Noah good place we can get something to eat?
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Atch
  • Atch who?
  • Bless you!

Knock Knock Jokes (21-30):

  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Harry
  • Harry who?
  • Harry up and answer the door!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Arthur
  • Arthur who?
  • Arthur any more cookies left?
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Nana
  • Nana who?
  • Nana your business!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Justin
  • Justin who?
  • Justin the neighbourhood, and heard you needed a laugh!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Europe
  • Europe who?
  • No, you’re a poo!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Lettuce
  • Lettuce who?
  • Lettuce in and we’ll tell you!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Who
  • Who who?
  • Is there an owl in here?
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Fuk
  • Fuk who?
  • No, Fuk Yu!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Dishes
  • Dishes who?
  • Dishes a nice place you got here!
  • Knock, knock
  • Who’s there?
  • Alex
  • Alex who?
  • Alex the questions around here!

Please share this post:

If any of these knock knock jokes made you smile then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. So, it’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share now.

Then perhaps you’d like more laughs? Just click on the links below.

Thank you for your support.

More fun you might enjoy:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2023. All Rights Reserved.

Filed Under: Funny Jokes Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Funniest Jokes 2023: Could these be the 5 of them?

06/09/2023 by

Funniest Jokes 2023Want to be the life and soul of the party, dear reader? Then here are 5 of the funniest jokes to tell your friends and make them laugh. They all made me laugh, that’s for sure.

So take a few moments to enjoy them all.

And then please feel free to pass them on.

Funniest Jokes 2023:

1. The Test:

A teacher has prepared a test for two of her students.

Now one of these kids is very clever but the other one is a bit slow, to say the least.

The test has 10 questions and the teacher sits both students down in the classroom and gives them 45 minutes to complete the test.

Once completed by the students, the test papers are sent away for independent marking and assessment.

When the teacher receives the marked test papers back, she looks at the slow kid’s mark first. He’s been given 9 out of 10.

“That’s astonishing!” the teacher thinks to herself.

She then looks at the clever kid’s mark and he too has been given 9 out of 10.

“That can’t be right,” the teacher exclaims.

So she goes through the clever kid’s paper in detail.

The first nine questions he’s got all right. However, for the tenth question, he’s simply written, “Sorry mam, but I don’t know the answer to this question.”

So the teacher then goes through the slow kid’s paper in detail.

Again he’s got the first nine questions all right. And then for the tenth question he’s written, “I don’t know the answer either.”

2. Questionable weather:

Jane is arguing with her husband, Bill about the winter weather, precipitation and how they would describe the amount of moisture currently in the atmosphere.

“Well,” said Jane. “This to me is drizzle.”

“No,” Bill responded. “It’s heavy mist.”

This debate went on for a while and then, eventually, Jane suggested they ask the elderly man next door.

“Hey,” said Jane, “Rudolf’s a former Soviet communist from Russia. He’ll know all about bad weather.”

So they went next door and asked Rudolf for his opinion.

“It is drizzle,” Rudolf declared.

Needless to say, Bill felt a little put out, losing the argument in this way.

“Why should we accept his judgement anyway?” asked Bill.

Jane smiled and said, “Because Rudolf the Red knows rain, dear!”

3. Communication breakdown:

Sister Elizabeth is walking down to breakfast in the convent one morning when she meets Sister Gillian.

“Good morning Sister Elizabeth,” says Sister Gillian, “it looks like you got out of the wrong side of the bed.”

In response, Sister Elizabeth smiles. She’s slightly puzzled by Sister Gillian’s comment but she lets it go.

As she proceeds down the corridor towards the dining room, she then bumps into Sister Julienne.

“Good morning Sister Elizabeth,” says Sister Julienne, “it looks like you got out of the wrong side of the bed.”

Though mildly irritated by hearing this comment a second time, once again she smiles and lets it go.

As she enters the dining room, Sister Elizabeth bumps into the Mother Superior.

“Good morning Sister Elizabeth,” says the Mother Superior, “it looks like you got out of the wrong side of the bed.”

“Why on earth do people keep asking me that question?” says Sister Elizabeth. “Have I been rude to anyone?”

“No, not at all,” replies the Mother Superior, “but you’re wearing the Bishop’s slippers.”

4. The wages of sin:

Mary is saying goodbye to her husband, John, as he nears death.

“My love,” said John. “Before I die, I must confess that I was once unfaithful to you with another woman. In our fifty years of marriage, it was once and only once, I swear. Please can you forgive me?”

Mary fidgets for a moment and then she reaches for the chest at the end of the bed. She opens the lid and takes out two ears of corn and a thousand dollars in cash.

Mary shows this to John and slightly bemused he asks, “What’s this?”

“Well John, I’ve been unfaithful too,” Mary responds. “And each time I had a lover I put an ear of corn in this chest.”

John is clearly upset momentarily but then he says, “Well, it was only twice. But what was the money for?”

Mary starts to weep and then she says, “Each time I got enough ears of corn for a bushel, I sold it.

5. The Good Samaritan:

Margarita had left her home in the small city of Campeche in Mexico for what she thought would be an exciting life in New York City.

However, the drudgery of life as a chambermaid, working in a third-rate hotel on 9th Avenue, proved to be a depressing experience.

She felt so depressed that one night she found herself standing on Brooklyn Bridge, contemplating throwing herself into the East River.

At that moment, a Good Samaritan came walking across the bridge in the shape of a handsome young man, named Tom.

“Hello, I’m Tom,” said the young man. “Please tell me what’s troubling you, mam.”

“Life in Manhattan, working as a chambermaid, it is so hard,” Margarita responded. “I wanted so much more. And I can’t go home now, so I have nothing to live for.”

“Look mam, the world is full of opportunity,” said Tom. “Hey, I’m a sailor and tomorrow we’ll be sailing to London, England. You could come too. I could stow you away on the ship and take care of you. I’ll bring you food each day and keep you happy.”

Margarita thought about it momentarily and she realised that she had nothing to lose, so she accepted Tom’s offer.

That night, Tom took her aboard the ship and hid her in a small, but surprisingly comfortable, compartment in the hold.

From then on, each night Tom brought sandwiches and some red wine and after they’d eaten, he’d make love to her.

A few days later, during a routine inspection, the Captain discovered Margarita.

“What are you doing here?” asked the Captain.

“Sir, I have an arrangement with one of your sailors,” replied Margarita. “He brings me food and he’s taking me to London, England on your ship.”

“Really?” the captain responded.

“Yes sir,” said Margarita. “He’s been taking advantage of me too, sir.”

“He certainly has, mam,” replied the Captain. “This is the Staten Island Ferry.”

If you enjoyed these jokes, please share them:

Funniest Jokes 2023So dear reader, was this post amusing and worth a few minutes of your time?

If you agree these were the funniest jokes 2023 and they made you smile, at least a little, then please share them with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share this post now.

Then perhaps you’d like more laughs? Then just click on the links below.

More fun you might enjoy:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2023. All Rights Reserved.

Filed Under: Funny Jokes Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

30 Guess What jokes to raise a smile or two

06/08/2023 by

GUESS WHAT JOKESI know how much readers enjoy a good laugh, and that’s why I’ve curated a collection of delightfully clever Guess What jokes just for you today.

These aren’t just your everyday, run-of-the-mill jokes. They’re mostly just a clever play on words. That’s what I enjoy, and I hope that you enjoy this form of humour too, dear reader.

So, grab a coffee, take an unofficial break, relax and enjoy the humour I have on offer for you today.

And please, feel free to pass on these jokes.

Guess what jokes (1-10):

  1. Guess what? They told me I’d never be good at poetry because I’m dyslexic. But so far, I’ve made three jugs and a vase.
  2. Guess what? I got my friend a fridge for his birthday. I can’t wait to see his face light up when he opens it.
  3. Guess what? My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing it. So, we went and had a few drinks. Nice guy. He’s a web designer.
  4. Guess what? My friend asked me to help him round up his 37 sheep. I said ‘40‘.
  5. Guess what? I’ve just written a pop song about tortillas. Well, it’s more of a wrap really.
  6. Guess what? I started a band called 999 Megabytes. We’ve got no gigs yet.
  7. Guess what? My wife asked me if I could clear the kitchen table. I had to take a running start, but I made it.
  8. Guess what? I had a joke about a boomerang, but I’ve forgotten it. It’ll come back to me.
  9. Guess what? My friend’s bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast.
  10. Guess what? I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I’ve been tripping all day.

Guess what jokes (11-20):

  1. Guess what? I can’t stand being in a wheelchair.
  2. Guess what? I had an addiction to soap, but I’m clean now.
  3. Guess what? I asked a Frenchman if he played video games. He said, ‘Wii.’
  4. Guess what? I once did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.
  5. Guess what? I was going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.
  6. Guess what? I was going to tell you a joke about infinity, but it doesn’t have an end.
  7. Guess what? I wrote a book on penguins. In hindsight, paper would have been better.
  8. Guess what? I used to be an astronaut, but I couldn’t stand the pressure.
  9. Guess what? At the library, I asked for a book on levitation. They said it was currently floating around somewhere.
  10. Guess what? A friend asked me if I had any sodium hypobromite. I said NaBrO.

Guess what jokes (21-30):

  1. Guess what? I used to be a lifeguard until some blue kid got me fired.
  2. Guess what? I wanted to learn to juggle, but I just don’t have the balls.
  3. Guess what? I’ve just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. Tell you what, never again.
  4. Guess what? I’ve just told a chemistry joke, but I didn’t get a reaction.
  5. Guess what? I know a lot of jokes about retired people but none of them work!
  6. Guess what? I told my wife I saw a deer on the way home. She said, “How do you know he was on his way home?”
  7. Guess what? My boss told me to have a good day. So, I went home.
  8. Guess what? I had a dream I was a muffler last night. I woke up exhausted!
  9. Guess what? I’ve just opened a new restaurant called Karma. There’s no menu, you get what you deserve.
  10. Guess what? I bought a ceiling fan the other day. Complete waste of money. He just stands there applauding and saying “Ooh, you’re brilliant.”

Please share this post:

GUESS WHAT JOKESIf any of these Guess What jokes made you smile then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. So, it’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day. So go on, please share now.

Then perhaps you’d like more laughs? Just click on the links below.

Thank you for your support.

More fun you might enjoy:

You might like to try these free games too:

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2023. All Rights Reserved.

Filed Under: Funny Jokes Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
« Previous Page
Next Page »