If you’re looking for some witty short jokes to make you smile, then here are 23 that I hope will brighten your day.
There’s nothing like a good laugh to make the day feel brighter. Well, I think so, anyway.
So, enjoy the fun, and then please pass them on.
Witty Short Jokes:
- I saw a robbery in an Apple Store. Does that make me an iWitness?
- Q: Does February like March? A: No, but April May
- I have a fear of long distances, so I go to great lengths to avoid them.
- Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Ground beef.
- If a child refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
- Q: What did the snowman say to the customer? A: Have an ice day!
- Milk is the fastest liquid on earth. It’s pasteurized before you even see it!
- Q: Why do seals swim in saltwater? A: Because pepper water makes them sneeze!
- I had a fear of speed bumps but I slowly got over it
- Q: When does a duck wake up? A: At the quack of dawn.
- My girlfriend left me for religious reasons. She worshipped money and I don’t have any.
- Q: How does an Elephant get out of a tree? A: It sits on a leaf and waits till the Fall.
- I don’t normally tell Dad jokes, but when I do, he always laughs.
- Q: Who never minds being interrupted in the middle of a sentence? A: A convict.
- I went to my doctor to see why I had such an excessive fear of snakes. He said I have a reptile dysfunction.
- Q: What do you call a reindeer with no eyes? A: No eye deer.
- A girl in the office asked me if I had a date for Valentine’s Day. I told her it’s always February 14th, as far as I know.
- Q: What vegetable was forbidden on the ships of Arctic explorers? A: Leeks!
- An old man is struck by a car and brought to the hospital. A nurse enters his room and says, “Sir, are you comfortable?” The old man replies, “I make a nice living.”
- Q: What do you give to a pumpkin who’s trying to quit smoking? A: A pumpkin patch!
- I have a fear of overly designed buildings. It’s a complex complex complex.
- Q: What’s the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? A: Snowballs!
- I saw a math book and a dictionary on a date last night. They looked like they had good chemistry!
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So, dear reader, did you find these witty short jokes as amusing as you’d hoped? Certainly, I hope they all made you laugh.
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Thank you.
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