How to stop worrying and start living

10/21/2023 by

How-to-stop-worrying.webpWe all tend to worry a bit more than we should.

Worrying is natural, but it is rarely helpful. It just adds to our stress levels. And what’s the worst thing that can happen anyway?

And even if it did happen, would worrying have stopped it from happening?

Life’s too short to stress ourselves out with worry.

The question is, how do we stop ourselves from worrying? Well, consider this idea.

Dale Carnegie’s book How to Stop Worrying and Start Living is a very useful guide. This book is a great personal development text and it’s well worth reading. I can strongly recommend it to you.

How to stop worrying:

However, until you have the chance to read it this animated video provides a useful summary of the key ideas in the book.

So I can recommend you watch this video now and then read the book whenever you get the chance.

Further reading:

Readers serious about their own personal development will be keen to establish their own small library of motivational resources I’m sure.

Dale Carnegie’s book would be an essential addition to any personal development library and it can be purchased HERE.

Go on, check it out now whilst it’s fresh in your mind.

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How to find and do work you love, now and forever

10/15/2023 by

How to find and do work you loveHow to find and do work you love? A great question for all you very intelligent readers to contemplate today.

Now not everyone will find the answer of course but most people frequently ask this question in my experience.

Job satisfaction:

How many people would say they get job satisfaction from their work, in percentage terms?

Apparently, it’s only around 20%.

That would suggest that 80% of all people hate their jobs.

If true, I think that matters and it’s especially relevant to society if you think about it. Why?

Quite simply because it suggests that most people will not be quite as productive as they might otherwise be. Let’s face it, you can’t really be at your most productive if you’re not happy in your job.

A sense of purpose:

So dear reader, which side are you on?

Does your workplace you in the 20% who enjoy job satisfaction or are you one of the 80%?

Essentially job satisfaction comes as a result of doing work that gives us a sense of purpose.

If we have a genuine sense of purpose, we’ll have a strong desire to do our work well. And we can only do it to the best of our ability if it really matters to us.

Doing our work well matters because that’s how we make a difference.

Hence that’s how we make a contribution and leave a legacy behind us.

So in that sense job satisfaction certainly matters.

Consider your work:

Does your work really matter to you?

And does it give you a sense of purpose? Perhaps it’s simply the means for paying your bills?

Do you get out of bed each morning looking forward to the day ahead?

No job is ever perfect but, given work takes up a third of our lives, it’s essential that we enjoy what we do and derive at least some job satisfaction from it.

Maybe there’ll be some elements of a given job we dislike but mostly we should enjoy our work because that way we’re better placed to do it well.

In the inspirational TEDx Talk video embedded below, Scott Dinsmore explains how in the early part of his career he was encouraged to do any job just to build up his resumé.

However, he very quickly realized that this approach was unwise and resulted in no job satisfaction.

He makes his point with an excellent quote from Warren Buffett who said, “Taking any job just to build your resumé is like putting off sex until your old age.”

Now, why would that make sense?

Experience is important of course but work should not just be about building your resumé.

Work should be about adding value and making a meaningful contribution to society.

It should be about using your skills and natural talent to make a difference to the lives of others.

So, if success is your aim then the work you do must matter to you.

If you find work you enjoy then job satisfaction will follow.

Put simply, if you like the work you do you’ll do it well. And if you do it well people will notice. And once people begin to notice you then you’re on your way to achieving real success.

Knowledge required:

The trick is to find work that you can’t not do.

Something you’d happily do for nothing if you couldn’t find someone to pay you to do it.

That’s the basis for real job satisfaction.

All of this is more easily said than done of course.

Perhaps you’ve no idea about what matters to you in terms of work.

If you’re relatively young and new to the world of work how could you possibly know? In that case, you need to start improving your basic knowledge and awareness.

1. Know yourself:

A good starting point for improving your knowledge is becoming a self-expert. Knowing just what you have in your arsenal.

  • What are your unique strengths?
  • What are your weaknesses?
  • What fills you with enthusiasm?
  • What fills you with dread?
  • What do you love to do?
  • What do you hate doing?

If I asked someone you knew well to tell me what you’re good at what would they say?

  • For what activity do they regard you as the ‘go to’ person?
  • What do they regularly thank you for?
  • What would you do for fun if you couldn’t do it for a living?
  • On what activity can you lose yourself for hours at a time?

By answering these questions and others like them you’ll get a better idea of what you’re looking for. And let’s face it, if you don’t know what you’re looking for you’ll never find it.

2. Know your values:

What do you regard as your set of values? What moral framework matters to you when you’re making decisions?

What would you not do simply because you wouldn’t want to disappoint your family? What would make you feel proud if you were to tell your family that’s what you’re doing?

Anything you choose to do should be congruent with your own set of values.

3. Know your experiences:

The most powerful lessons in life come from the mistakes we make. The lessons we learn from our own mistakes and the things we’ve done are collectively known as experience. And experience is a valuable commodity.

Pay attention to your experience. Think about the things you’ve done right. Think about the things you’ve done wrong.

When have you felt completely in control of a situation regardless of the challenges you face?

When have you felt completely out of your depth?

Think about the things you’ve enjoyed doing. Think about those activities you really hated.

4. Know what matters to you:

In crude but simple language the underlying question here is, “What is it that you actually DO ‘give a shit’ about?”

We tend to do stuff because other people suggest it’s what we should be doing. However, it really should be about what actually matters to us.

Identify what it is that makes you come alive and makes you feel energized.

John Lennon’s Aunt Mimi famously said, “Playing the guitar is all very well John but you’ll never make a living at it.”

Fortunately, John didn’t listen to her and his guitar helped him to make a very lucrative living because he really enjoyed writing songs and playing music.

In fact, his creative output continues to generate millions of dollars for his estate 40 years after his death.

John Lennon did well because he did something he enjoyed doing and he didn’t allow himself to be influenced by those who thought he should pursue a different line of work.

Confidence compounds:

By working to your strengths your confidence will grow.

Each success you have will improve your confidence. And as your confidence grows, one success will lead to another. It’s a virtuous circle.

Environment matters too:

Jim Rohn once said, “You’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”

Personally, I think this is true.

The people around you really do matter.

They influence you and their attitude rubs off on you.

Human beings are social animals and we exist within groups. We also have to fit into the group otherwise we’re very quickly ostracized by other group members.

Hang around with people who inspire possibility. People who lift you up and not pull you down. Mix with people who will influence you in a positive way. Find role models from whom you can learn.

How to find and do work you love:

Scott Dinsmore’s mission is to change the world by helping people find what excites them and build a career around the work only they are capable of doing.

If you can find the work you are compelled to do then you can add real value to your fellow human beings.

Discover what you’re really meant to do and you’ll be on to a winner.

You’ll also get maximum job satisfaction.

Therefore in conclusion, if you’ve yet to find what you’re looking for then keep looking until you do.

In the meantime, I recommend that you watch the video. It is thought-provoking and compelling and it will be a good use of your time.

Recommended Reading:

There are plenty of good books that will help you identify your true strengths, as well as help you home in on the work you should be doing.

In the video, Scott Dinsmore suggests Strengths Finder 2.0 by Tom Rath as a good book to help you in your quest.

Certainly, it is worth your time, it’s very useful and I have a copy of it in my own personal reference library.

However, allow me to recommend another three excellent texts you might also consider. They are as follows:-

The Life You Were Born to Live: A Guide to Finding Your Life Purpose Dan Millman

The Pathfinder: How to Choose or Change Your Career for a Lifetime of Satisfaction and Success by Nicholas Lore

Find what you were born for: Discover your strengths, forge your own path and live the life you want by Zoe McKey

I have all of these books in my personal library and I’ve found them all extremely useful and helpful and I use them as reference texts all the time.

You can check them out by clicking on the links.

I strongly recommend you take a closer look at them all. You won’t regret it if you do decide to buy your own copies. Check them out now whilst it’s all fresh in your mind.

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3 things you need to know about money

05/13/2023 by

THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT MONEYToday I’d like you to think about some things you need to know about money, dear reader. In other words, think about what it all really means.

It’s natural to dream about being rich, of course.

Most people dream about being able to buy whatever they want and go anywhere and everywhere they’d like to go, possibly even in a private jet.

The attraction of having that pot of gold is why a lot of people will chase every rainbow.

However, whilst money is necessary for sustaining life, there are some things you should really understand about money.

Here are three of them:-

Things you need to know about money:

1. Having money brings its own pressures:

A great fortune is a great slavery. ~Seneca

It’s reasonable to want to create wealth and build a fortune. As suggested above, you want to feel financially secure, don’t you? Why wouldn’t you?

However, being financially secure doesn’t mean you’ll have a life without problems and worry.

You’ll just have different problems and different things to worry about.

No one goes through life without problems. Dealing with problems and challenges is an inevitable part of human existence.

Put simply, having money brings its own pressures.

Once you’ve got money your biggest concern will be to ensure that you hang on to it.

Inevitably that means you can become a slave to managing your money, preserving its capital value and protecting your fortune.

Being wealthy may be a nice problem to have, but it’s no less of a problem for that.

So keep it all in perspective.

Things you need to know about money2. Money can never be more important than people:

We love to earn money, who doesn’t? It gets you things. ~Katie Price

Earning money is great and it does allow you to buy things you want and things you need. However money won’t take care of you when you’re ill.

Yes, it might enable you to buy in some hired help.

However, that’s not the same as having someone around who genuinely cares about your well-being. That someone for whom you matter much more than money ever will.

In my experience, whilst money is important, nothing in our lives matters more than friends and loved ones. Human beings are social animals. So only people matter to us really.

Never focus on money to the point where you neglect the people who should matter most to you. Forget about them and eventually, they will forget about you.

You can have all the money in the world, but you’ll have nothing at all without friends and loved ones.

Go out and earn lots of money by all means, and enjoy it too.

However, always maintain a sense of balance in your life and make sure that you allocate some time for the people who matter most to you.

An investment of your time in the people you love is an investment that will pay dividends.

3. Money is a precious resource so use it wisely:

A penny saved is a penny earned. ~Benjamin Franklin

I make no apology for repeating Benjamin Franklin’s money mantra, repeated frequently by generations of well-meaning parents to their profligate children. It’s as valid today as it was in his day.

Whether Franklin was referring to money saved when making purchases or money saved from income is not obvious in his statement but that doesn’t matter.

The underlying point is that you have to be careful with your money because saving money is the key to building wealth and becoming financially independent. No one ever got rich by wasting their money.

Money like time is a precious resource, so use it wisely.

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Public Speaking: The Power of the Pause

12/13/2022 by

Public SpeakingToday I offer you a tip for public speaking: the power of the pause. This is a great tip from Brian Tracy.

If your aim is to be successful then mastering the art of public speaking is an essential skill you must develop.

If you’re a successful, high-profile individual you can’t avoid speaking in public, at least occasionally. However much you might try to resist it I’m afraid it’s like trying to hold back the tide. It can’t be done.

However, I recognize that public speaking can be a bit daunting even for people who are otherwise quite confident.

So if you lack confidence in this area then don’t worry. You’re not alone I promise you. Most people feel just like you do when they find themselves standing in front of a crowd faced with the expectation that they’ll be able to say something meaningful and present it in an interesting and engaging way too.

The key to being interesting is developing your public speaking technique. The more you practice and build your technique the more confident you’ll feel when you step up to the lectern.

One way to improve your public speaking technique is to learn from some of the best speakers and copy what they do. And Brian Tracy is an excellent speaker worthy of study. Personally, I find him both interesting and inspiring.

So if Brian has something to say then listening to him is worthy of your time I believe.

In the short but excellent video embedded with this post, Brian Tracy offers some useful advice on the subject of public speaking. In particular, using the power of a pause to emphasize or reinforce a point being made.

An important element of public speaking is making sure that the underlying messages resonate with your audience. If they take away three or four powerful messages then you’ll have done your job and done it well.

If you want to improve your public speaking skills, I recommend you watch this video.

You’ll learn some helpful tips, as well as one of the little-known secrets used by top public speakers.

Once again I must say, Brian’s short video is well worth a few minutes of your time.

Public Speaking: The Power of the Pause

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Valuing people must take precedence in the modern age

11/12/2022 by

Valuing peopleQuote of the Day:

Value the people who value you. ~Bill Withers

Why Valuing People Matters:

One thing you’ll learn as you get older is the importance of valuing people.

We can all get so carried away with our work and careers that we can forget what really matters most.

Now I’m sure that your work is important to you and perhaps you even believe that you’re indispensable to your employer.

If you really believe that then, all I can say is, dream on.

From experience, I can tell you that there’s no such thing as indispensable when it comes to being employed.

If you were to die tomorrow then your employer would replace you in a heartbeat and the company would carry on without you. You won’t be missed for long and in all probability, you’d be forgotten fairly quickly.

That’s why it’s essential to ensure that your life has balance.

Yes, of course, you need to work, to earn an income to put a roof over your head and bread on the table. So in that sense, work’s important.

However, it shouldn’t be everything to you. Some things are much more important.

Don’t let time slip through your fingers without having spent some of it on a regular basis with those that really matter to you; the people closest to your heart. That is your loved ones.

Your employer may not miss you for very long, should you pass away, but the family and friends you leave behind would feel a sense of loss for the rest of their lives. For family and friends, you cannot be replaced.

It’s later than you think:

Work gives us a sense of purpose and a sense of identity too, but only people really matter. So valuing people must always take precedence over work and material things.

So make sure you enjoy some time with those that matter to you before it’s too late.

And, you never know, it could be later than you think.

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How much should I be paid?

08/12/2022 by

How much should I be paidDear reader, have you ever asked yourself the question, “How much should I be paid?” Probably, I would guess. Most people do at some point. Certainly, it’s a question I’ve asked myself many times.

We live in challenging economic times, so we’re all keen to ensure that we earn as much as we can. The question is, how much?

What is work?

In the modern age, people tend to think in terms of their careers, and many lose sight of what work is all about.

A career is just a natural progression of jobs within a given profession or industry through which we develop our skills and experience over time. Each of those jobs represents work.

In simple terms, work is just doing something for someone in return for money. Essentially, we provide a service or solve a problem, and an employer is our customer.

So, we’re paid to deliver results for the employer. With the emphasis being on delivery.

How much should I be paid?

The financial reward you get for the work you do is based on two things: –

  1. The value you can add; and
  2. The laws of supply and demand (also known as the market rate).

The value you can add is directly proportional to the skills you have and your knowledge and experience of the profession or industry in which you are seeking to work.

The supply and demand for your skills and experience within the job market will dictate how much an employer will be prepared to pay.

Why don’t businesses pay people more?

Essentially labour is a commodity. By definition, a commodity is something that can only be differentiated in terms of price.

None of us will pay more for a commodity than necessary.

For example, say, you want to buy a loaf of bread and in one store it costs $1 and, in another store, the same loaf costs $1.50. Which store will you buy from? The $1 store, obviously, because that’s what any rational person would do. Why would anyone pay more than they must?

Well, businesses think in the same way.

Businesses exist to make a profit. Profit is sales income less costs and, almost always, the biggest cost for any business is the cost of labour.

So, businesses will not pay any more than they must for people. Why would anyone expect it to be otherwise?

An employer doesn’t care about what you think you’re worth.

Your worth to the business will be judged solely on the potential value you can add and the availability and demand for your skills and experience.

How do I measure the value I add?

Essentially value is another way of saying your skills and experience, dear reader.

Alternatively, for an entry-level job, your value would be your potential.

If an employer is seeking a junior staff member for training, then your aptitude and qualifications would be a proxy for the value you could potentially add once your training has been completed.

I think I’m worth more:

If you think you’re being paid less than you deserve, then you have two options: –

  1. Go to your boss and request a raise; or
  2. Test the (job) market.

Either way, you need to do your homework first.

  1. Request a raise:

Before speaking to your boss about a raise, do some basic research on pay rates for similar jobs to yours with a requirement for the same skills and experience that you offer.

Also, identify at least three significant things that you do in your current role that make a real difference to the company. Ideally, these should be things only you can do.

Think also about how you might be able to do those things you do best more efficiently to improve your productivity.

Once you have all this information, you’re ready to justify why you think you deserve more.

  1. Test the market:

Even if you’re otherwise happy with your current employer, it can be worth putting yourself about a bit in the job market, to see what other companies would be willing to pay you.

Apply for some other jobs and see what companies are willing to pay you.

And remember; most companies know that they’ll have to offer an uplift of at least 20% on your current salary to persuade you to take the risk of leaving your current employer, certainly if you’re highly skilled.

Once you have a suitable offer, you’ve then got two choices.

Either you accept the offer and move to the new employer, or you take that offer to your current employer and see whether they’re willing to match it.

I have done this more than once and it does work.

Given the cost to the employer of losing a highly valued member of the team, most employers will match an offer rather than lose you.

And if they’re actually willing to let you leave, then they didn’t value you and therefore you might as well go.

How do I earn more?

Another way to think about this is, how do you make yourself more valuable?

And you should be building your value, constantly.

If you want to earn more then learn more.

Work hard on building your experience too. Be willing and ready to accept new challenges, however daunting, for rough seas make skilled sailors.

Become the ‘go-to’ person for some activity that is perceived as valuable to the business.

Your focus should be on ‘what you’re becoming’ rather than any short-term gain and eventually, you have a good chance of becoming very valuable.

Think about it this way. Whatever you’re doing, you’re just there to serve customers and solve problems for them

There will always be customers for goods and services, some not even invented yet. Goods and services are another way of saying problems customers have which need a solution and you’re the provider of that solution.

The greater the skills and experience required to solve those problems the more you will earn, assuming you have those skills and experience.

How much should I be paidKnow the market rate:

Every business keeps a close eye on the market rates for given skills and experience. They do this to ensure that they’re not overpaying.

You should keep a close eye on market rates too, to ensure that you’re not being underpaid for what you’re doing.

In short, you must be very disciplined and business-like in your approach to work and selling your skills.

Think of yourself as a small business providing goods and services to your boss, your colleagues, and the customers of the company for which you work.

Conclusion:

You won’t get paid more than you’re worth.

However, if you increase your value by learning more, constantly, and building your skills and experience then you can earn more.

Choose a highly skilled discipline with high demand and an undersupply of potential candidates and you can earn a lot of money.

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