5 funny jokes to cheer up a friend and make you smile

If you’re looking for some funny jokes to cheer up a friend, then how about these five I have on offer today?

I’ve told them to a few people recently, and the responses have all been positive.

By positive, I mean laughter has followed.

So enjoy them all, and feel free to share them with your friends.

Funny jokes to cheer up a friend:

1. The new store on Main Street:

Jerry and Mike were two young businessmen who were setting up a new store on Main Street.

The store wasn’t quite ready for opening yet, but at least all the shelves were now set up and located in their proper places.

They’d had a hectic morning setting up those shelves, so they were now taking a well-earned break.

As they surveyed the results of all their hard work, Jerry said, “I’ll bet you any minute now someone will walk by, put their face to the window, and then ask what we’re selling.”

Mike smiled, but before he could respond, a little old lady was peering through the glass. In a soft voice, she said, “What are you selling here?”

Well, Jerry couldn’t resist a sarcastic response.

“We’re selling schmucks,” he said.

Right back at him, the little old lady responded, “You’re doing well then. You’ve only got two left!”

2. The geek and the frog:

A geek is having his lunch on campus. It’s a beautiful spring day, so the geek is sitting on the grass outside the college building, brown bag in hand.

There’s a fountain close by, and as he’s enjoying a sandwich, suddenly a frog hops from the water and straight over to speak to the geek.

“Hello,” says the frog. “Thank goodness you’re here. I’m a beautiful princess, but the wicked witch has cursed me. A kiss from you will break the spell. If you could do that for me, I’ll be ever so grateful.”

The geek stares at the frog momentarily, then picks it up without saying a word and puts it in his pocket. Having finished his lunch, he then gets up and heads back towards the college building.

The frog can’t believe what’s happening.

“Hey, did you hear me?” the frog asks. “Kiss me, and you’ll have your beautiful princess.”

The geek pats the frog on the head and begins to whistle.

The frog is starting to get a little concerned.

“Please, help me,” says the frog. “I don’t want to remain a frog. I want to be the princess I once was. If you kiss me, I’ll marry you. Then you’ll be royalty, and you will lead a charmed life for as long as you live.”

“Look, froggy,” says the geek. “I’m a computer software geek. I wouldn’t know what to do with a girlfriend. However, a talking frog? Now, that’s cool.”

3. The affair:

A wealthy, married businessman from New York had been having an affair with an attractive Italian woman for a few months.

One night, during their regular rendezvous in Manhattan, she confided in him that she was pregnant.

For him, this was a significant problem, both in terms of the potential reputational damage and the risk of a costly divorce.

So, he paid her a large sum of money and a regular monthly allowance on the condition that she would return to Italy to have the child.

He also promised her that if she stayed in Italy, he would pay her child support until the child turned 18.

She agreed to this proposal, but then wondered how she could let him know when the baby was born.

“We’ll have to use a code,” said the man. “To keep it discreet, send me a postcard when the baby is born. And to confirm the baby’s birth, write Spaghetti on the back.”

Nine months later, the wealthy businessman arrived home to find his wife looking very confused.

“Honey,” she said, “you’ve received a very odd postcard today.”

“Let me look,” he said.

His wife handed him the postcard and watched as he read it. He looked surprised and quickly turned white, then red, before he fainted.

On the postcard was written, “Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without.“

4. The baptism:

A drunken guy stumbles across a baptismal service one Sunday afternoon down by the river.

He walks into the water and stands next to the preacher. The preacher notices the drunk and says, “Mister, are you ready to find Jesus?“

The drunk looks at him and says, “Yes, preacher, I am.”

The minister dunks the guy underwater and pulls him right back up.

“Have you found Jesus?” asks the preacher.

“No, sir, I haven’t!” said the drunk.

The preacher dunks him under the water a second time for a more extended period, then brings him up and says, “Now, my friend, have you found Jesus?“

“No, sir, I haven’t,” the drunk responds.

Frustrated, the preacher holds the man under for a full minute this time before bringing him back to the surface. He says to him in a harsh tone, “My God, sir, have you found Jesus yet?“

The drunk wipes his eyes and says to the preacher, “Are you sure this is where he fell in?“

5. The flying experience:

Boarding was now complete on Flight 205, and all passengers were seated, awaiting the pilot and co-pilot.

The pilot and co-pilot arrive, and as they climb the steps to the plane, passengers notice that they’re both wearing dark glasses and both have long white sticks. They both appear to be blind, as they’re using the sticks to feel their way up the steps.

Well, naturally, the passengers start to freak out as they watch them struggle to find their way into the cockpit with the help of the cabin crew.

The cabin crew then prepare for departure, as if everything is normal, carrying out their final checks and so on.

Quickly, as it now all appears normal, the passengers start to calm down. They assume the pilot and co-pilot must have been joking at their expense.

Eventually, the plane moves off the stand, and within minutes, it is cleared for takeoff.

The plane is now racing down the runway.

At the end of the airport runway, a very steep cliff falls away into the open sea.

As the plane speeds down the runway, there’s no sign of lift-off, and the cliff edge is getting closer and closer by the second.

The passengers start screaming in panic, but then, suddenly, the plane is airborne, and calm returns once again.

In the cockpit at this moment, the pilot says to the co-pilot, “You know, one of these days, the passengers won’t scream early enough, and we’re all going to die.”

Please share this post with your friends:

Did you enjoy these funny jokes to cheer up a friend? Were they as amusing as you’d hoped, dear reader?

I hope so anyway.

If that’s the case, please share this blog post with your friends because when you share, everyone wins.

Please share this post on social media now. If you can do that for me, I’ll be truly grateful, and you’ll be helping a keen blogger reach a wider audience.

Thank you.

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