37 short quotes that are funny and sharp

02/27/2023 by Roy Sutton

Pinterest

Reddit

If you’re looking for some short quotes that are funny and sharp, dear reader, then I’ve curated 37 little gems for you today.

I’m confident that at least a few of them will make you smile.

Who originally gave us these little gems? I have no idea. But whoever it was, we should all thank them.

So, take a few moments to enjoy that all and please feel free to pass them on.

Short quotes that are funny (1-10):

I’m not short, I’m fun-sized!

I’m not old, I’m just a classic.
I’m not weird, I’m just different.
I’m not fat, I’m just easy to see.

I’m not lazy, I’m just energy efficient.
I’m not weird, I’m just a limited edition.
I’m not bald, I’m just taller than my hair.

I’m not old, I’m just chronologically gifted.
I’m not always right, I’m just never wrong.
I’m not impatient, I just prefer not to wait.

Short quotes that are funny (11-20):

I’m not messy, I’m creatively disorganized.
I’m not clumsy, I’m just gravity challenged.
I’m not moody, I just have a lot of feelings.

I’m not stubborn, I’m just persistently right.
I’m not antisocial, I’m just selectively social.
I’m not lost, I’m just taking the scenic route.

I’m not sarcastic, I’m just fluent in smartass.
I’m not late, I’m just chronologically challenged.
I’m not a control freak, I’m a control enthusiast.

I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

Short quotes that are funny (21-30):

I’m not difficult, I’m just picky about my stupidity.
If life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.

I don’t have bad handwriting; I have my own font.
I’m not crazy, my reality is just different than yours.
I wanted to be a baker but couldn’t raise the dough.

I don’t suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
I’m not procrastinating, I’m prioritizing in reverse order.
I’m not always right, but when I am, it’s usually by accident.

I’m not messy, I just like to create my own obstacle courses.
I tried to start a hot air balloon business, but it never took off.

Short quotes that are funny (31-37):

I’m not arguing, I’m just passionately expressing why I’m right.

I’m not a procrastinator, I’m just very efficient at doing nothing.
I’m not forgetful, I’m just experiencing spontaneous memory loss.
I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right in a different way.

I’m not nosy, I’m just overly curious about everything and everyone.
I’m not a morning person. I’m a mourning person, mourning the loss of my sleep.
If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of debt payments.

Please share with your friends:

So, there you have it. My 37 short quotes that are funny. However were they as funny as you’d hoped? I hope so.

Perhaps you feel that you could still use a good laugh?

If so, then please click on the links below. You’ll find plenty of smiles to amuse you.

And if you’ve enjoyed what you’ve read here then please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

I appreciate your support. Thank you.

Articles you might enjoy:

You might like to try these free games too:

Chess online free

Copyright © Mann Island Media Limited 2023. All Rights Reserved.

(Visited 3,237 times, 242 visits today)

Filed Under: Witty One-Liners Tagged With: Amuse, Amusement, Brilliant one-liners, fun, funny, funny witty quotes, humor, humour, jokes, Laugh, LOL, one-liners, Short quotes that are funny, smile, witty one liners, witty one-liner quotes