25 comedy movie quotes to make you smile

09/18/2025 by

Today I’m exploring comedy movie quotes. Those little gems we all enjoy from our favourite movies.

I’ve curated 25 such quotes, just for you, dear reader.

I hope you enjoy them all.

Feel free to share them with your friends.

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Comedy Movie Quotes

  1. “You’re so stupid you threw a rock at the ground and missed.”
    — Joe Dirt (David Spade), Joe Dirt
  2. “I have two moods: sleep and hungry.”
    — Fat Amy (Rebel Wilson), Pitch Perfect
  3. “I’m not great at farewells, so… that’ll do, pig.”
    — Deadpool (Ryan Reynolds), Deadpool
  4. “You’re not ugly, society is.”
    — Napoleon Dynamite (Jon Heder), Napoleon Dynamite
  5. “I feel like I’m taking crazy pills!”
    — Mugatu (Will Ferrell), Zoolander
  6. “It’s like I’m the only one who’s not on drugs here.”
    — Annie (Kristen Wiig), Bridesmaids
  7. “Well, I like you, but I’m not gonna cry if you get eaten by zombies.”
    — Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg), Zombieland
  8. “If you were anymore dense, we’d call you a black hole.”
    — Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.), Iron Man 2
  9. “I’m sorry I called you an idiot. I honestly thought you already knew.”
    — Peter Venkman (Bill Murray), Ghostbusters
  10. “Life is not the French Riviera, it’s the DMV with fluorescent lighting.”
    — Violet Weston (Meryl Streep), August: Osage County
  11. “You’re like a weird, sad puppy who can’t stop talking.”
    — Deadpool (Ryan Reynolds), Deadpool
  12. “Your incompetence is stupefying.”
    — Dr. Evil (Mike Myers), Austin Powers
  13. “No offense, but your face makes me sad.”
    — Red (Craig Robinson), This Is the End
  14. “You have the emotional depth of a teaspoon.”
    — Hermione Granger (Emma Watson), Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
    (Technically not American, but widely quoted in American media with sarcasm!)
  15. “I’m surrounded by idiots.”
    — Scar (Jeremy Irons), The Lion King
  16. “You couldn’t pour water out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel.”
    — O Brother, Where Art Thou? (George Clooney)
  17. “I’d rather be dead in a ditch than go to your party.”
    — Olive Penderghast (Emma Stone), Easy A
  18. “I’m just one stomach flu away from my goal weight.”
    — Emily (Emily Blunt), The Devil Wears Prada
  19. “You sit on a throne of lies.”
    — Buddy (Will Ferrell), Elf
  20. “I’m not rude. I’m honest. There’s a difference.”
    — Natasha Romanoff (Scarlett Johansson), Avengers: Endgame
  21. “The only thing you’re going to be catching is these hands.”
    — Shuri (Letitia Wright), Black Panther
  22. “So you agree? You think you’re really pretty.”
    — Gretchen Wieners (Lacey Chabert), Mean Girls
  23. “That’s not a burn book. That’s a diary with aggression issues.”
    — Regina George (Rachel McAdams), Mean Girls
  24. “You can’t sit with us!”
    — Karen Smith (Amanda Seyfried), Mean Girls
  25. “I didn’t come here to make friends.”
    — Elle Woods (Reese Witherspoon), Legally Blonde (used ironically)

Please share this post with your friends:

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So, please share it now. If you can do that for me, I’d be ever so grateful. You’ll be helping a keen blogger reach a wider audience. So that would be your good deed for the day.

If you fancy some laughs, click on the links below. You’ll find plenty to make you smile.

Thank you.

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Filed Under: Witty One-Liners Tagged With: , , , , , ,

25 Funny TV Show Quotes & Comedy Film Quotes too

08/18/2025 by

Today, I have curated some funny TV show quotes. There are 25 in total, and they all made me laugh.

Enjoy them all. I’m confident they will make you smile as well.

And, as a bonus, I’ve curated 25 comedy film quotes too.

All of these quotes have been chosen for their sharp wit, absurdity, or perfect comedic timing, and they’re guaranteed to tickle the funny bone.

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25 Funny TV Show Quotes:

  1. “I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious.”
    — Michael Scott (Steve Carell), The Office (US)
  2. “My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.”
    — Mitch Hedberg (as himself), Comedy Central Presents
  3. “When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.”
    — Barney Stinson (Neil Patrick Harris), How I Met Your Mother
  4. “I’m not great at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?”
    — Chandler Bing (Matthew Perry), Friends
  5. “Sometimes I start a sentence, and I don’t even know where it’s going.”
    — Michael Scott (Steve Carell), The Office (US)
  6. “Treat yo’ self!”
    — Donna Meagle (Retta), Parks and Recreation
  7. “You can’t just give up. Is that what a dinosaur would do?”
    — Joey Tribbiani (Matt LeBlanc), Friends
  8. “I have the charisma of a damp rag.”
    — Malcolm Tucker (Peter Capaldi), The Thick of It
  9. “There’s only one thing I hate more than lying: skim milk. Which is water that’s lying about being milk.”
    — Ron Swanson (Nick Offerman), Parks and Recreation
  10. “I am Beyoncé, always.”
    — Michael Scott (Steve Carell), The Office (US)
  11. “I don’t have dreams. I have goals.”
    — Harvey Specter (Gabriel Macht), Suits
  12. “I don’t need a therapist. I have a horse.”
    — BoJack Horseman (Will Arnett), BoJack Horseman
  13. “I’m allergic to mornings.”
    — Garfield (Lorenzo Music), Garfield and Friends
  14. “You had me at ‘we’ll get food’.”
    — Jess Day (Zooey Deschanel), New Girl
  15. “You can’t handle the tooth!”
    — Phil Dunphy (Ty Burrell), Modern Family
  16. “I ate a big red candle.”
    — Brick Tamland (Steve Carell), Anchorman (TV cameo reference)
  17. “Leslie, I typed your symptoms into the thing up here and it says you could have network connectivity problems.”
    — Andy Dwyer (Chris Pratt), Parks and Recreation
  18. “If I don’t talk, it’s because I’m holding in a scream.”
    — George Costanza (Jason Alexander), Seinfeld
  19. “I can’t go to jail! I don’t have the upper body strength for it!”
    — Gob Bluth (Will Arnett), Arrested Development
  20. “I want to cry so bad, but I don’t think I can spare the moisture.”
    — Phoebe Buffay (Lisa Kudrow), Friends
  21. “I’ve made a huge mistake.”
    — Gob Bluth (Will Arnett), Arrested Development
  22. “I’m not a hero. I put my bra on one b**b at a time like everyone else.”
    — Tina Belcher (Dan Mintz), Bob’s Burgers
  23. “I have no idea what I’m doing, but I know I’m doing it really, really well.”
    — Andy Dwyer (Chris Pratt), Parks and Recreation
  24. “We were on a break!”
    — Ross Geller (David Schwimmer), Friends
  25. “My body is a temple… ancient and crumbling.”
    — Dorothy Zbornak (Bea Arthur), The Golden Girls
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25 Comedy Film Quotes:

  1. “I’m not even supposed to be here today!”
    — Dante Hicks (Brian O’Halloran), Clerks
  2. “I’m just one stomach flu away from my goal weight.”
    — Emily Charlton (Emily Blunt), The Devil Wears Prada
  3. “Do I make you h*rny, baby?”
    — Austin Powers (Mike Myers), Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery
  4. “60% of the time, it works every time.”
    — Brian Fantana (Paul Rudd), Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
  5. “I’m in a glass case of emotion!”
    — Ron Burgundy (Will Ferrell), Anchorman
  6. “Fat guy in a little coat.”
    — Tommy Callahan (Chris Farley), Tommy Boy
  7. “We’re not worthy! We’re not worthy!”
    — Wayne Campbell (Mike Myers), Wayne’s World
  8. “It’s just a flesh wound.”
    — Black Knight (John Cleese), Monty Python and the Holy Grail
  9. “It’s so fluffy I’m gonna die!”
    — Agnes (Elsie Fisher), Despicable Me
  10. “Nobody makes me bleed my own blood. Nobody!”
    — White Goodman (Ben Stiller), Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
  11. “You’re killing me, Smalls!”
    — Hamilton “Ham” Porter (Patrick Renna), The Sandlot
  12. “I’m kind of a big deal.”
    — Ron Burgundy (Will Ferrell), Anchorman
  13. “I’m not a smart man, but I know what love is.”
    — Forrest Gump (Tom Hanks), Forrest Gump
  14. “What is this? A center for ants?”
    — Derek Zoolander (Ben Stiller), Zoolander
  15. “I am serious. And don’t call me Shirley.”
    — Dr. Rumack (Leslie Nielsen), Airplane!
  16. “You sit on a throne of lies.”
    — Buddy (Will Ferrell), Elf
  17. “Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing gl**.”
    — Steve McCroskey (Lloyd Bridges), Airplane!
  18. “Don’t mess with the bull, young man. You’ll get the horns.”
    — Richard Vernon (Paul Gleason), The Breakfast Club
  19. “We’re gonna need a bigger boat.”
    — Chief Brody (Roy Scheider), Jaws (Not a comedy per se, but often quoted humorously)
  20. “I’m not drunk, I’m just talking in cursive.”
    — The Dude (Jeff Bridges), The Big Lebowski
  21. “I invented Post-its.”
    — Christie Masters (Julia Campbell), Romy and Michele’s High School Reunion
  22. “Did we just become best friends?!”
    — Dale Doback (John C. Reilly), Step Brothers
  23. “I’m in love, I’m in love, and I don’t care who knows it!”
    — Buddy (Will Ferrell), Elf
  24. “I’m sorry I ruined your lives and crammed eleven cookies into the VCR.”
    — Buddy (Will Ferrell), Elf
  25. “That rug really tied the room together.”
    — Walter Sobchak (John Goodman), The Big Lebowski
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Please share this post with your friends:

If you enjoyed these funny TV show quotes, please share this post with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins.

So please share it now. If you can do that for me, I’d be ever so grateful. You’ll be helping a keen blogger reach a wider audience. So that would be your good deed for the day.

If you fancy some laughs, then click on the links below. You’ll find plenty to make you smile.

I appreciate your support, dear reader. Thank you.

Affiliate Disclosure: This site is an affiliate for Expedia and related companies. This means that if you click on the link and make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you. I only recommend products or services that I think will be valuable to you. Any commissions earned help support the content I create.

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© Mann Island Media Limited 2025. All rights reserved.

Filed Under: Witty One-Liners Tagged With: , , , , ,