If you like funny puns then I’ve put together a batch of very corny ones in the hope it will raise a smile or two. They all made me smile but for me the cornier the pun the better.
I hope you enjoy them all dear reader.
Funny puns:
- Odourless chemicals just don’t make scents.
- I love how the Earth rotates. It really makes my day.
- I was working in a glue factory, but I couldn’t stick with it.
- Surely writing with a broken pencil is pointless.
- The cost of the space program is astronomical.
- I was inconsolable when my PlayStation was stolen.
- Our office defibrillator didn’t work. Nobody was shocked.
- I googled “how to start a fire” and got 869,000 matches.
- Did you hear about the fire at the circus? It was in tents!
- I used to be a history teacher, but there’s no future in it.
- How’s my long-distance relationship going? So far, so good.
- I cancelled my gym membership because it wasn’t working out.
- Waking up this morning was an eye-opening experience.
- I felt lonely, so I bought some shares. It’s nicer to have some company.
- If you’re thinking about singing karaoke with a friend, just duet.
- To whoever stole my antidepressants, I hope you’re happy now.
- I wanted to be an astronaut but my parents told me the sky was the limit.
- I sued the airport for mislaying my baggage, but I lost my case.
- There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator, and only a fraction of people will find that funny.
- I get really claustrophobic in elevators, so I’ve started taking steps to avoid it.
- Tennis players have a hard time in relationships because love means nothing to them.
- What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter!
- A rubber band slingshot was confiscated in an algebra class for being a weapon of math disruption.
- What’s the difference between a nicely dressed man on a tricycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? A tire.
- The thing about shopping centres is that once you’ve seen one, you’ve seen a mall.
- My housemate told me to take the spider out instead of killing it. We went out and had some drinks. Cool guy. Wants to be a web developer.
- A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, the nurse replied “No change yet.”
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If you fancy some more laughs then click on the links below. You’ll find plenty to make you smile.
Thank you.
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