When you want to suggest a hint of menace then having a few dark sarcasm quotes up your sleeve is always useful.
After all, people need to know that they shouldn’t mess with you.
Sarcasm is a powerful way of getting that message across.
So today I offer you 30 great dark sarcasm quotes and I hope they all entertain you.
Take a few minutes to enjoy them all. I did and I’m confident you will too.
And please, feel free to pass them on.
Dark sarcasm quotes (1-15):
- Sarcastic? Me? Well, a little sardonic perhaps.
- Surely you must be on stupid pills?
- If I’m smiling that alone should scare you.
- I’ve had a wonderful evening but this wasn’t it.
- Zombies eat brains. So you’ll be quite safe.
- Well, aren’t you a little ray of pitch-black?
- Keep your head high and your middle finger higher.
- Am I joking or am I psychotic? You don’t want to find out.
- I really need the one thing you can provide, your absence.
- If it looks like I don’t care, that’s because I really don’t.
- Am I free this afternoon? No, I’m very expensive.
- I don’t treat people badly. I treat people accordingly.
- If I cut you off then in all probability you handed me the scissors.
- You’re allowed to use your brain you know. It’s not illegal just yet.
- I’m a leader, not a follower. Unless it’s dark, then you’re going first.
Dark sarcasm quotes (16-30):
- Oh, I’m sorry. Did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?
- I feel like a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat that isn’t there.
- If you can’t say something nice, at least make it clever and devastating.
- My level of sarcasm has reached the point where I don’t even know if I’m kidding or not.
- I don’t like making plans in case they lead to the word ‘premeditated’ being thrown around in a courtroom.
- Don’t be a complete prick all your life. Take a few minutes off and give the rest of us a break.
- I’m sorry. While you were talking I was struggling to figure out why you think I care.
- My life’s been full of disappointments and you’ve just been added to the list.
- No, I can’t help you but I can offer you a sarcastic remark.
- When I said how stupid can you be it wasn’t meant to be a challenge.
- No, I wouldn’t say I’m the best in the world but I’m confident I’m in the Top 1.
- You should be careful if you don’t want to be offended. I can speak fluent sarcasm.
- It’s one of life’s mysteries but those who whine loudest tend to be those who’ve contributed least. Why is that?
- You think you’re street smart but I’m guessing that’s Sesame Street.
- Oh, you were talking to me? I’m sorry I thought there was something wrong with you.
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