33 life lessons learned that are best learned early

Life lessons learned for most of us are learned the hard way. Here are 33 of those lessons that are best learned as early as possible, ideally in your teens or early 20s.

LIFE LESSONS LEARNED
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Life lessons learned:

1. On experiencing life:

Wherever you are, be there. Be present and experience the moment. You’ll remember moments with friends and family all your life, whereas you’re unlikely to remember social media posts moments after you’ve read them. No experience beats having a good laugh with your friends and family.

2. On making choices:

As an adult, you’re free to make your own choices but you must accept any consequences that follow. A wise adult learns to make good choices because the choices you make will dictate the quality of the life you lead. Your choices matter. Make too many bad ones and your life experiences won’t be very good at all.

3. On the future (1):

Where you’re going is more important than where you’ve been. The past was a series of lessons to be learned. The future is where you’ll spend the rest of your life. You can’t change the past but your future has yet to be written, and you’ve got the pen.

4. On the future (2):

The future is an endless stream of opportunities that you can choose to seize, or not. However poor your past may have been, that doesn’t mean you can’t seize new opportunities and exploit them to your own advantage. You can, with determination and hard work. And, never let anyone discourage you from having a go. Better to try and fail than to spend your life wondering what might have been

5. On asking questions:

Intelligent people ask questions. So, never be afraid to ask questions when you don’t understand something, or when you need clarification. Better to appear a fool momentarily than remain a fool permanently.

6. On attitude:

The greatest disability in life is a bad attitude. If you’ve got one you’d better change it, if you want your life to improve. Attitude matters. An average person with a positive attitude makes a much better employee than a genius with a chip on his or her shoulder.

7. On fairness:

Life isn’t fair. It never has been and it never will be. We’re all dealt a set of cards in life, and all we can do is play that hand as best as we can. We could get angry about the unfairness of it all or we can just get on and make the best of what we have. The latter approach is much easier on our nerves, in my experience.

8. On bullying:

When you’re having fun at someone else’s expense, remember it may be fun to you, and you may not mean any harm, but for the other person the impact of such an experience can be humiliating, upsetting, and it can cause significant, lasting and often permanent psychological damage to that person. So remember, it isn’t fun at all if it isn’t fun for the other person. If it isn’t fun for them, it’s just bullying. And if you’re bullying, you’re not being cool, you’re being nasty.

9. On judging others (1):

You’re free to judge others if you’re sure that you’re perfect in every way. If you conclude that you’re not quite perfect then why would you expect others to be?

10. On judging others (2):

For everyone, life is a struggle. No one is without problems, despite any external signs to the contrary. We just have to keep going for it’s the only way. Life goes on and we must too. If you’ve not walked two miles in someone else’s shoes, you’re not in a position to judge them. So, don’t.

11. On authenticity:

Authenticity is simply being who you are and not trying to be who you think you should be or who you think you’re expected to be. People will respect you for being who you are. An original is always better than a fake.

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12. On trust:

Trust takes years to build and seconds to break. And once broken the way you’re seen by others will never be quite the same again. Trust is a valuable commodity. Protect it.

13. On reputation:

Never underestimate the importance of your reputation. And if you wouldn’t be happy to read something about yourself on the front pages, don’t do it.

14. On communication:

If you want to tell anyone anything, speak softly and you’ll find that they’re much more likely to listen to you.

15. On success:

No one can ever be a failure but everyone can be a success. Failure is not a person it’s just an outcome you didn’t want. It’s also an opportunity to try again with greater knowledge and experience. Everyone can achieve some degree of success if they believe in themselves, they’re determined and they’re willing to work hard.

16. On priorities:

We all have the same amount of time. 168 hours a week. It’s how we choose to use it that dictates whether we achieve anything significant or not. Time is a resource, pure and simple. So, decide on your priorities and allocate your time accordingly. And just because someone wants a piece of your time, doesn’t mean you’re obliged to give it to them. If it’s not a priority, nor an obligation, just say NO.

17. On watching television:

Few people seem to recognise this but there’s a significant cost to watching television. Not the cost of purchasing the television set or any cable or satellite subscriptions you may have. The real cost is the opportunity cost of your time. That is the time you spend watching television. Time is money and you could be doing something more profitable with your time. Learning something new perhaps or running your own little income-generating side hustle.

18. On qualifications (1):

Most of the work done by most people in life doesn’t require a college degree at all. If you have one that’s great but stay humble. A motivated individual with common sense and decent reading, writing and arithmetic skills can succeed in life without one.

19. On qualifications (2):

You may need a college degree to work for an employer but you don’t need one to work for yourself. If it’s your business, you make the rules.

20. On qualifications (3):

Plenty of people graduating from Harvard will end up working for people who didn’t. So, stay humble. Studying at a top university is no guarantee for career success, nor does it guarantee wealth. A Harvard, Oxford, or Cambridge degree may look good on your CV but five years after graduation the only thing that will matter is what you’ve achieved in the workplace since.

21. On experience:

Doing is by far the best way to learn. The classroom is useful, of course, but nothing beats doing and learning from your mistakes. Making mistakes will teach you lessons that you’ll never forget. And learning from your mistakes will give you that valuable commodity known as experience. Knowing the theory is useful, whereas having experience is essential.

22. On employability:

You don’t sell who you are. You sell what you can do and the value you can add. Every job is about doing stuff for other people and delivering results. What is it you can do and what can you confidently deliver? Before you go for any job interview, make sure you have answers to these questions and make sure you can give examples of stuff you’ve delivered on previous occasions.

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23. On work (1):

Employers can quickly replace you with someone just like you and you’ll be forgotten quickly. So be professional in carrying out your duties, of course, but not at the expense of your interests or those of your loved ones.

24. On work (2):

Make sure you take good care of yourself. Employers will take everything you give and a bit more besides but if you died tomorrow your job would be posted online before your obituary. You’ll be replaced within days and the memory of your presence won’t last long.

25. On making money:

To make money you have to be doing stuff for other people. To make a serious amount of money you have to be doing stuff for multiple people simultaneously, even when you’re asleep. Sounds impossible but it can be done. For instance, serving the many with your digital products, sold online, can lead to great wealth.

26. On sales:

Successful selling is not about tricking people into buying something they don’t need. The art of selling is in proactively finding customers who’ve got problems for which your products can provide the ideal solution. If you can offer solutions to problems, you’ll find customers in need of what you have to sell. Find the right customers and a good product will sell itself.

27. On change (1):

It’s easier to remain as you are than it is to change but unless you change your life will not improve. Embracing change is hard but it is well worth the effort.

28. On change (2):

For things to change, you have to change. For things to get better, you have to get better. You can become more than you are but it won’t happen by accident. It all starts with you saying, I can; I will; and I won’t stop until I get there. And you must make any changes necessary.

29. On finding a life partner:

You’ll find, as you go through life, that Mr or Miss Perfect doesn’t exist. If you’re looking for a life partner, find someone whose faults you can live with. Yes, you’ll need to enjoy each other’s company. And yes, you’ll need to have things in common. However, everyone you meet will have faults of their own, even if they’re not immediately apparent.

30. On children (1):

When you have young children they need your attention much more than your mobile phone does. Your children should be your priority, particularly in the early years. You’re their role model. Be a positive role model and give them all the attention they deserve. The years pass quickly and your children, good or bad, are your legacy to the world.  Social media can wait. Anything less is simply a disservice to your child.

31. On children (2):

Children need continuity and they need boundaries. They need to be brought up with a set of values too. Fail to give them those things and you fail as a parent. Materialism is no substitute for the things that matter most.

32. On your social life:

You’ll never fit into every social group, nor should you try. Just focus on finding a group of people that are right for you. In other words, find your tribe. People that are welcoming to you, with interests like yours and personalities that appeal to you. It’s better to be in the company of people that appreciate your company, rather than trying to fit into groups that don’t want you there at all.

33. On experts:

There are plenty of people referred to as experts whose ideas and recommendations can prove to be stupid beyond belief. Listen to experts by all means but then use your own judgement. Don’t be fooled by people, just because they’ve got an impressive job title. If your instinct says they’re wrong, have the courage of your convictions and act accordingly. Just because an ‘expert’ said it, doesn’t mean you have to accept it.

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How can I improve my self-discipline?

If you’ve been asking yourself, “How can I improve my self-discipline?” this article is for you.

Self-discipline is a key skill for reaching your goals and finding success in life. It helps you stay on track, avoid distractions, and progress even when you don’t feel motivated.

Many people struggle with self-discipline at times. That’s not unusual.

It’s normal to face challenges when trying to build new habits or break old ones.

However, the good news is that self-discipline can be strengthened like a muscle through consistent practice and the right strategies.

  • Setting specific, achievable goals helps build self-discipline and motivation
  • Creating a structured daily routine supports consistent progress toward objectives
  • Breaking tasks into smaller steps makes it easier to overcome procrastination and stay disciplined
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Self-discipline is a key skill for personal growth and success. It helps people reach their goals and overcome challenges. Learning about self-discipline can make it easier to put into practice.

Self-discipline involves using mental resources to control thoughts and actions. It requires self-awareness and the ability to delay gratification.

People with strong self-discipline can resist temptations and stay focused on long-term goals.

Brain scans show that self-discipline activates the prefrontal cortex. This area manages planning and decision-making. Regular practice can strengthen these neural pathways over time.

Willpower is like a muscle that can be trained and improved. But it can also get tired, leading to ego depletion. This happens when mental energy runs low after extended use.

Setting clear goals is vital for self-discipline. Goals give direction and motivation. They help people stay on track when faced with distractions or setbacks.

Effective goals are: • Specific • Measurable • Achievable • Relevant • Time-bound

Writing down goals makes them more concrete. Breaking big goals into smaller steps makes them less daunting. Regular progress checks help maintain momentum and allow for adjustments.

Common obstacles to self-discipline include:

  1. Lack of clear goals
  2. Poor time management
  3. Procrastination
  4. Negative self-talk
  5. Environmental distractions

Recognizing these barriers is the first step to overcoming them. Self-awareness helps identify personal weak spots. Some people struggle with social media distractions. Others find it hard to say no to social invitations.

Developing strategies to address specific obstacles can boost self-discipline. This might involve using website blockers or creating a dedicated workspace.

Self-discipline is a skill that can be improved through practice and effective techniques.

By setting clear goals, developing consistent routines, and managing time wisely, anyone can enhance self-control and achieve more.

Setting clear goals is crucial for building self-discipline. Start by defining specific, measurable objectives. Break larger goals into smaller, manageable tasks. This approach makes progress easier to track and boosts motivation.

Prioritize consistency over intensity when working towards goals. Small, daily actions often lead to better results than sporadic bursts of effort.

Write down goals and review them regularly. This helps maintain focus and commitment.

Use SMART criteria: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound.

For example, instead of “exercise more,” set a goal like “jog for 20 minutes three times a week for the next month.” This clarity makes it easier to stay disciplined and track progress.

Consistency is key to building self-discipline.

Create daily routines that support goals and promote good habits. Start small and gradually increase commitments as discipline improves.

Establish morning and evening routines. These bookend the day with structure and set a positive tone. Include activities like meditation, exercise, or reading to reinforce disciplined behavior.

Practice self-control regularly in small ways. This strengthens willpower for bigger challenges. For instance, make the bed every morning or always put dishes away immediately after meals.

Track progress using a habit tracker or journal. This visual record of consistency can be motivating and help identify areas for improvement.

Time-blocking is an effective strategy for improving self-discipline.

It involves scheduling specific tasks for set periods, reducing distractions, and increasing focus.

Start by listing daily tasks and estimating how long each will take. Assign each task to a specific time slot in the day. Be realistic about timing and include breaks.

Use a digital calendar or planner to create time blocks. Color-code different types of activities for easy visualization. Stick to the schedule as much as possible, but allow some flexibility for unexpected events.

Remove distractions during focused work periods.

Turn off notifications, close unnecessary browser tabs, and find a quiet workspace. This helps maintain discipline and improves productivity.

Review and adjust time blocks regularly. Learn from experience to create more accurate and effective schedules over time.

Self-control is a skill that can be strengthened through practice and specific techniques. It plays a key role in achieving goals and resisting temptations.

Start small to build your self-control muscle. Pick one habit to change at a time. This could be eating healthier or exercising more.

As previously stated, you must set clear, achievable goals.

Write them down and track your progress daily. This helps keep you accountable.

Create a routine and stick to it. Regular habits reduce the need for willpower by making good choices automatically.

Get enough sleep. Lack of rest can weaken self-control. Aim for 7-9 hours of sleep each night.

Practice mindfulness. Even 5 minutes of meditation daily can boost focus and self-regulation.

Use positive self-talk. Replace negative thoughts with encouraging ones. This builds confidence in your ability to resist temptations.

Visualize success. Picture yourself achieving your goals. This mental practice can strengthen resolve.

Practice cognitive restructuring. Challenge and reframe unhelpful thoughts that weaken willpower.

Plan for obstacles. Identify potential challenges and prepare strategies to overcome them.

Use “if-then” planning.

Create specific plans for how to act in tempting situations.

For example, “If I feel like skipping my workout, then I’ll go for a 10-minute walk instead.”

Building self-discipline often involves facing obstacles. Having strategies to deal with setbacks and create backup plans can help you stay on track.

To improve self-discipline, it’s important to identify common challenges. These may include procrastination, lack of motivation, or external distractions.

One effective strategy is to remove temptations. This could mean turning off phone notifications or clearing your workspace of distractions.

Setting small, achievable goals can help build momentum. Breaking larger tasks into smaller steps makes them feel less daunting.

It’s also helpful to track progress. Using a habit tracker or journal can provide motivation and highlight areas for improvement.

As suggested, practicing mindfulness can increase awareness of impulses and help resist them. Regular meditation or deep breathing exercises can strengthen this skill.

Having a backup plan is crucial for maintaining self-discipline when faced with unexpected challenges. It provides a safety net and keeps you moving forward.

Start by identifying potential roadblocks. Think about what might derail your efforts and plan how to handle these situations.

Create alternative routines. If your usual workout time is disrupted, have a quick home exercise routine ready.

Build a support network. Have friends or family members who can offer encouragement or help when needed.

Be flexible with your goals. If circumstances change, adjust your targets rather than giving up entirely.

Regularly review and update your backup plans. As you progress, new challenges may arise, requiring different strategies.

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Accountability partners and feedback play key roles in boosting self-discipline. These external supports can provide motivation and help track progress.

An accountability partner can greatly improve success rates for reaching goals. This person checks in regularly to ensure you’re staying on track. They offer encouragement and help you stick to your plans.

Choosing the right partner is crucial. Pick someone trustworthy and committed to your success. Set clear expectations together. Decide how often you’ll check in and what information you’ll share.

Use technology to stay connected. Apps and video calls make it easy to touch base, even from a distance. Share progress updates and discuss any challenges you face.

Implementation intentions can strengthen this partnership. Create specific “if-then” plans for potential obstacles. This prepares both you and your partner to handle setbacks.

Feedback is a powerful tool for improving self-discipline. It provides valuable insights into your progress and areas for growth.

Seek feedback from various sources. Ask friends, family, coworkers, or mentors for their honest opinions. Be open to both positive and negative comments.

Create a system for collecting feedback regularly. This could be through monthly check-ins or progress reports. Use surveys or questionnaires to gather specific information.

Act on the feedback you receive. Identify patterns in the comments. Use this data to adjust your strategies and behaviors. Celebrate your successes and learn from your mistakes.

Remember that feedback is a form of positive reinforcement. It can motivate you to keep pushing forward, even when things get tough.

Creating new positive habits is key to improving self-discipline.

Setting clear goals and taking small steps can lead to lasting change. By making specific plans and starting with easy actions, you can build momentum toward better habits.

Implementation intentions are detailed plans that specify when, where, and how you will act on your goals. They take the form of “If X happens, then I will do Y.” This approach makes it easier to follow through on good habits.

To create implementation intentions:

  1. Choose a specific habit
  2. Decide on a trigger (time, place, or event)
  3. Plan your exact response

For example: “If it’s 7.00 am, then I will meditate for 10 minutes in my living room.”

These plans reduce decision-making in the moment. They help people act on their intentions automatically, even when tired or stressed.

Starting small is crucial when building new habits. Baby steps make change less daunting and more achievable. They allow for quick wins, which boost motivation and confidence.

To take baby steps:

  • Break big goals into tiny, manageable actions
  • Focus on consistency rather than perfection
  • Gradually increase difficulty over time

For instance, to start exercising, begin with a 5-minute walk each day. As this becomes routine, slowly extend the time or add new activities.

Small, consistent actions can lead to significant changes over time. They help build the mindset and skills needed for larger challenges. By starting small, people can avoid overwhelm and create lasting habits.

Mindfulness and positive reinforcement play key roles in building self-discipline. These practices help increase self-awareness and create lasting behavioral changes.

Mindfulness helps people notice their thoughts and feelings without judgment. This allows them to make better decisions that support their goals. To practice mindfulness:

  • Take a few deep breaths when facing a challenge
  • Pay attention to the present moment
  • Notice physical sensations and emotions

Regular mindfulness practice improves focus and reduces stress. This makes it easier to stick to goals and resist temptations.

People can start with short 5-minute sessions and gradually increase the time. Consistency is more important than length.

Positive reinforcement helps build new habits by rewarding good behavior. This creates a positive association with self-discipline.

Some ways to use positive reinforcement:

  • Celebrate small wins
  • Treat yourself after completing a difficult task
  • Track progress and acknowledge improvements

It’s important to choose rewards that don’t undermine goals. For example, someone trying to eat healthier shouldn’t use junk food as a reward.

Positive self-talk also reinforces good habits. People should praise their efforts and progress, not just the results.

self-discipline

Self-discipline is a skill that can be improved through various strategies and techniques. It offers numerous benefits and can be applied in many areas of life.

Setting clear goals is key to staying disciplined. Break big goals into smaller, manageable tasks. Use a planner or app to track progress and stay organized.

Practicing patience is crucial. Remember that building discipline takes time and effort.

Students can improve self-discipline by creating a structured study schedule. They should set specific times for homework and stick to them.

Using rewards for completing tasks can boost motivation. Students might treat themselves to a fun activity after finishing an assignment.

Self-discipline helps people achieve their goals more effectively. It leads to better time management and increased productivity.

Improved self-control can result in healthier habits and lifestyle choices. Self-disciplined individuals often experience less stress and greater self-confidence.

Waking up early consistently to exercise before work shows self-discipline. Sticking to a healthy diet and avoiding junk food is another example.

Saving money regularly instead of making impulsive purchases demonstrates financial self-discipline. Completing household chores on schedule also reflects good self-discipline.

Setting clear, realistic goals is an effective technique. People should align these goals with their personal values.

Removing distractions from the environment can help maintain focus. Creating routines and habits around desired behaviors reinforces discipline over time.

People with ADHD can benefit from using visual aids like calendars or task lists. Breaking tasks into smaller, more manageable steps can make them less overwhelming.

Establishing a consistent daily routine can provide structure. Using timers for tasks can help with focus and time management.

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