30 Sarcastic quotes about life lessons to amuse you

05/15/2023 by Roy Sutton

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Today I return to the theme of sarcasm because this theme always results in some positive feedback from readers.

So here are some sarcastic quotes about life lessons many of which I’m sure will resonate with readers.

They made me smile and I hope they make you smile too.

Enjoy them all.

And please, feel free to pass them on.

Sarcastic quotes about life lessons (1-15):

Shhhh …… No one cares.
I may forgive but I never, ever forget.
Apology accepted but trust is denied.

I’ll try to be nicer if you’ll try to be smarter.
Some people are so poor all they have is money.
Don’t take yourself too seriously. No one else does.

There’s no need to repeat yourself, I’m ignoring you.
Let’s share. You take the grenade and I’ll take the pin.
I’m sorry, I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions.

Oh, I’m sorry. I forgot; I only exist when you need something.
I’m not heartless. I’ve just learned to use my heart less.
Everything I like is either expensive, illegal or won’t text me back.

I’m sorry for those mean, awful, accurate things I’ve just said.
You can laugh at anything, as long as it’s not happening to you.
An apple a day will keep anyone away if you throw it hard enough.

Sarcastic quotes about life lessons (16-30):

If I hurt your feelings by calling you stupid, I’m sorry but I thought you knew.
Of course, I can multitask. I can listen, ignore, and forget all at the same time.
Common sense is like deodorant. Those most in need of it are least likely to possess it.

Life’s just like an elevator. On the way up, sometimes you have to stop to let people off.
If you had to pay me a dollar for every smart thing you said, you wouldn’t owe me a cent.
You shouldn’t worry about what I’m doing. You should worry about why you’re worried about what I’m doing.

If someone throws a rock at you, just throw a flower back at them. But make sure it’s still in the pot.
If me living my life my way bothers you then you can always get yourself a life of your own.
No matter who tries to teach you lessons about life, you won’t truly understand them until you have to go through them on your own.

People are either on your side, by your side, or in your way. So choose them wisely.
Never waste your time with people who only want you around when it fits their needs.
I’ve reached the age where my brain’s gone from, “I probably shouldn’t say that” to “What the hell, let’s go for it and see what happens.”

Just when you think you know all the answers, life changes the questions.
It wasn’t an act of revenge. I was simply returning the favour.
There’s a difference between giving up and knowing when you’ve had enough.

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It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

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