25 quotes from Seinfeld show guaranteed to make you smile

Today I’m looking back at some memorable quotes from Seinfeld show.

One of the best sitcoms of all time for me was the Seinfeld show. It was a masterclass of petty sarcasm and social absurdity. I’ve seen every episode of every season multiple times, and they still make me smile.

So, take a few moments to enjoy these little zingers.

And, please, feel free to share them.

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  1. “No soup for you!”
    The Soup N*zi
  2. “I’m speechless. I am without speech.”
    George Costanza
  3. “You double-dipped the chip!”
    Timmy (George’s chip scandal)
  4. “Not that there’s anything wrong with that!”
    Jerry (recurring)
  5. “Serenity now!”
    Frank Costanza
  6. “I don’t trust men in capes.”
    Jerry Seinfeld
  7. “Yada yada yada…”
    Elaine Benes
  8. “Do you ever get down on your knees and thank God you know me and have access to my dementia?”
    George Costanza
  9. “Maybe the dingo ate your baby.”
    Elaine Benes
  10. “You had s*x with the cleaning lady on your desk?”
    Jerry Seinfeld
  11. “You’re so good looking!”
    Jerry (after sneezing joke)
  12. “These pretzels are making me thirsty!”
    Kramer (and everyone else)
  13. “I was in the pool!”
    George Costanza
  14. “She had man hands.”
    Jerry Seinfeld
  15. “I’m not the one going to hell.”
    David Puddy
  16. “You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister!”
    Kramer (via Elaine’s dad)
  17. “I’m out.”
    Jerry (from The Contest)
  18. “She’s a two-face!”
    Jerry, describing the lighting-dependent date
  19. “A Festivus for the rest of us!”
    Frank Costanza
  20. “The sea was angry that day, my friends.”
    George Costanza
  21. “He took it out.”
    Elaine (referring to a guy’s move mid-date)
  22. “You know how to take the reservation; you just don’t know how to hold the reservation.”
    Jerry Seinfeld
  23. “A George divided against itself cannot stand!”
    George (about worlds colliding)
  24. “Jerry, just remember: it’s not a lie if you believe it.”
    George Costanza
  25. I don’t wanna be a pirate!”
    Jerry Seinfeld

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If you fancy some more laughs, then click on the links below. You’ll find plenty to make you smile.

Thank you.

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