I love razor-sharp quotes, don’t you? I refer to those quotes that are both sharp and very funny when you give them just a little thought.
Whenever I come across a sharp and witty quote, I always make a note of it in my journal. And today, as I’ve been going through my journal, I’ve picked out 11 razor-sharp quotes that I think are funny and I thought you might enjoy them too, dear reader.
They definitely made me smile, so I hope they brighten your day too. Enjoy them all.
Razor-sharp quotes:
- Speed has never killed anyone. Suddenly becoming stationary, that’s what gets you. ~Jeremy Clarkson
- Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same. ~Oscar Wilde
- I wouldn’t say I was the best manager in the business, but I was in the top one. ~Brian Clough
- The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue. ~Dorothy Parker
- I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally. ~WC Fields
- Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion. ~Spike Milligan
- He has all of the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire. ~Winston Churchill
- I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. ~Noel Coward
- You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred. ~Woody Allen
- A lifetime of happiness! No man alive could bear it; it would be hell on earth. ~George Bernard Shaw
- The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drink what you don’t like, and do what you’d rather not. ~Mark Twain
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