UBilly Connolly waziwa zizigidi zabantu kwihlabathi liphela njengomhlekisi ongenantlonelo, onobukrelekrele obucacileyo kunye nombalisi webali obalaseleyo.
Edla ngokubizwa ngokuba yiBig Yin, igalelo lakhe kwezolonwabo oludumileyo, ingakumbi eBritane, libe likhulu kakhulu kwiminyaka engama-40 edlulileyo.
Waqala ukusebenza njengomthungi wentsimbi kwiindawo zokukhanda iinqanawa zaseGlasgow waza waqhubeka nomsebenzi wakhe njengomculi wesintu, ekuqaleni noGerry Rafferty waza emva koko waba ngumculi wedwa.
Ngaloo nto, ngokuthe ngcembe walufumana ubizo lwakhe lwendalo, olwalusenzela ukuba sonke sihleke kwaye sonwabe. Kwaye koku, uyagqwesa.
Ngomsebenzi wakhe njengomdlali ohlekisayo, uye wandisa isibongozo sakhe esithandwayo ngokudlala nokubonisa. Ekuthatheni ingqalelo impumelelo yakhe kunye nomsebenzi wakhe wesisa, ngoku ngokusesikweni unguMhlekazi uWilliam Connolly, weCBE.
UBilly Connolly ngumzekelo omhle womntu othe, ngokufumana into ayithandayo neyigqwesayo kuyo, waphumelela kakhulu.
Ngoko ke namhlanje, mfundi othandekayo, ndikunika ii-one-liners ezili-15 ezihlekisayo kakhulu zikaBilly Connolly ukuze ndikukhumbuze indlela akrelekrele ngayo. Yonwabele yonke.
Iilayini ezihlekisayo zikaBilly Connolly:
- Ungaze uthembele kwindoda ethi, xa ishiywe yodwa kwigumbi eline-tea epholileyo, ayizami. ~UBilly Connolly
- Umtshato yinto emangalisayo. Emva koko, kukwanjalo nekhithi yokulungisa ibhayisekile. ~UBilly Connolly
- Inkcazo yam yengqondi ngumntu onokumamela iWilliam Tell Overture ngaphandle kokucinga ngeLone Ranger. ~UBilly Connolly
- Ngubani owafumanisa ukuba singalufumana ubisi ezinkomeni, yaye wayecinga ukuba wayesenza ntoni ngelo xesha? ~UBilly Connolly
- Bendisoloko ndifuna ukuya eSwitzerland ukuze ndibone ukuba umkhosi wenza ntoni na ngezo mela zibomvu. ~UBilly Connolly
- Andazi ukuba kutheni kufuneka ndifunde ialjebra. Andinakuze ndiye apho. ~UBilly Connolly
- Ukuba uYesu wayengumYuda, kwenzeka njani ukuba abe negama lokuqala laseMexico? ~UBilly Connolly
- Abantu abaninzi bathi kukunqongophala kwesigama okukwenza uthuke. Inkunkuma. Ndiyawazi amawaka amagama, kodwa ndisakhetha uf***. ~UBilly Connolly
- Into esoloko indigxadazela kukuba xa abantu bevuthela impumlo, basoloko bejonge kwiihanki zabo ukuba kuphume ntoni na. Yintoni abalindele ukuyifumana? ~UBilly Connolly
- Xa abantu besithi, ‘Isoloko iyindawo yokugqibela ojongeka kuyo,”. Ewe kunjalo. Kutheni ungaqhubeka ukhangela ukuba uyifumene? ~UBilly Connolly
- Xa into 'intsha yaye iphuculwe!' yeyiphi? Ukuba intsha, akukaze kubekho nto ngaphambi kwayo. Ukuba luphuculo, ngoko kufuneka kubekho into phambi kwayo. ~UBilly Connolly
- Kutheni abantu besithi, 'Owu, ufuna ukufumana iqebengwana lakho uze ulitye nawe?' Ukufa kulungile! Inceda ntoni ikeyiki ukuba awukwazi ukuyitya? ~UBilly Connolly
- Intaka esesandleni ngokungaguquguqukiyo sh*** esihlahleni sakho. ~UBilly Connolly
- Xa ulinde ibhasi aze umntu akubuze, 'Ingaba ibhasi seyifikile?' Ukuba ifikile ibhasi, ngendime apha? ~UBilly Connolly
- Ingcebiso yam kuwe ukuba ufuna ukunciphisa umzimba: ungatyi nantoni na efika ngebhakethi. Amabhakethi zizixhobo zasekhitshini kwiyadi yasefama. ~UBilly Connolly
Nceda wabelane ngale post nabahlobo bakho:
Ngaba la mazwi ahlekisayo kaBilly Connolly akwenze wancuma?
Ndiyathemba njalo. Nangona kunjalo, uya kuba nokuhleka okuninzi ukuba ucofa amakhonkco angezantsi.
Kwaye ukuba uyonwabele into oyifundileyo, nceda wabelane ngayo yonke nabahlobo bakho kwimidiya yoluntu.
Xa usabelana, wonke umntu uyaphumelela.
Kuhlala kungumbono olungileyo ukudlulisa uncumo.
Ukuba ungabelana ngayo ngoku, ndingahlala ndinombulelo ongazenzisiyo. Uya kube unceda i-blogger ye-wannabe ifikelele kubaphulaphuli ababanzi.
Inkxaso yakho iyathakazelelwa, mfundi othandekayo. Enkosi.
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