15 Witty Quotes


Posts which include something to make readers smile always get a good response. So here are 15 witty quotes which are razor sharp and at least a few of them should brighten your day.

This is the latest in a collection of witty quotes put together in response to requests from readers for a little levity to break up the otherwise gloomy news which seems to be part of our lives today.

So go on have a laugh right now and enjoy them all.

  1. I generally avoid temptation unless I can’t resist it. ~Mae West
  2. When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun’. ~Groucho Marx
  3. Never put off till tomorrow what may be done the day after tomorrow just as well. ~Mark Twain
  4. Women and cats will do as they please and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. ~Robert A. Heinlein
  5. I think God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability. ~Oscar Wilde
  6. I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally. ~W.C. Fields
  7. My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best. ~Winston S. Churchill
  8. Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city. ~George Burns
  9. Two wrongs don’t make a right but they do make a good excuse. ~Thomas Szasz
  10. People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day. ~A.A. Milne
  11. If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign? ~Laurence J. Peter
  12. If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it. ~W.C. Fields
  13. Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away. ~Paul Terry
  14. When you’re courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That’s relativity. ~Albert Einstein
  15. Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? ~George Carlin

Please share these witty quotes with your friends on social media. Give them a laugh too. When you share, everyone wins.

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© Roy J Sutton and Mann Island Media Limited 2017. All Rights Reserved.


Comments

  1. Roy Sutton says:

    Glad to help.

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