12 of the funniest jokes

We all need a smile or two occasionally. Jokes cheer us up and laughter is the best medicine. So here are 12 of the funniest jokes in two lines; all found on the internet but unfortunately all by authors unknown.

Enjoy them all!

  • You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving
  • You need a parachute to go skydiving twice


  • Parallel lines have so much in common
  • It’s a shame they’ll never meet


  • Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make
  • Then they call me ugly and poor


  • Someone stole my Microsoft Office and they’re going to pay
  • You have my Word


  • I went to a really emotional wedding the other day
  • Even the cake was in tiers


  • Someone stole my mood ring
  • I don’t know how I feel about that


  • I tried to catch fog yesterday
  • Mist


  • Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
  • If it had four doors it would be a chicken sedan


  • I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrow too high
  • She looked surprised


  • I threw a boomerang a few years ago
  • I now live in constant fear


  • A guy shows up late for work. His boss yells, “You should’ve been here at 8.30!”
  • The guy replies, “Why? What happened at 8.30?


  • To people who say, “My dog is my best friend.”
  • I say, “Your dog may be your best friend but will it pick you up at the airport? I think not.”

If you enjoyed these jokes then please share them with your friends on social media. When you share, everyone wins.

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