Here is some funny political satire with laughter guaranteed


Funny political satire In the times in which we now live, it seems that intelligent political debate is something from a bygone age.

Perhaps it never really existed at all.

However the politically correct modern media has created a debate so lacking in intelligent and informed analysis that it has become completely pointless I think.

If you live in the United Kingdom dear reader, then an excellent example for me is the BBC’s Question Time. It may have a new host in Fiona Bruce but it’s still just a lot of hot air I think.

Essentially it’s just a carefully selected bunch of people with rigid views coupled with an inability to understand why others may think the way they do. And an unwillingness even to try.

I suppose that’s just the way it is nowadays.

Nevertheless it’s not a complete loss to us all because it does offer fertile ground for comedy and funny political satire.

So if like me you think that the BBC’s Question Time has become a mess of evidence-free assertions, class warfare, soundbites and smugness then you might just enjoy this comedy sketch from Harry Enfield and Paul Whitehouse.

It’s very funny and for me they have truly nailed the nature of what passes for modern political debate.

It made me laugh and I hope it makes you smile too.

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5 of the funniest jokes you’ll read today or any day

Funniest Jokes1. Fred and Ginger dining out:

Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers were dining out in a very swanky, five star New York City hotel and they’d both made a point of dressing for the occasion.

Ginger looked absolutely stunning is her ball gown and diamond tiara while Fred arrived in his trademark top hat, white tie and tails. They both looked like the million dollar movie stars they were.

All was going well with dinner until they got to dessert. While serving dessert the clumsy waiter managed to trip and Fred was showered from head to toe in treacle pudding.

Oh, I’m most terribly sorry, Mr Astaire,” said the waiter.

Fred was not amused. “So you ought to be,” he said angrily.

Fred sat there fuming as the waiter tried his best to assist.

Look at the state of me now,” said Fred. “I’ve pudding on my top hat; pudding on my white tie; and pudding on my tails.

2. Church on Sunday:

Leaving church one Sunday Bernadette said to her husband Frank, “Do you think Mrs O’Shaughnessy is dying her hair?

To be honest Bernadette, I didn’t even notice Mrs O’Shaughnessy,” Frank responded.

They walked together quietly for a few moments and then Bernadette remarked, “Did you see that skirt Mrs Kilkenny was wearing? Now don’t tell me you thought that was appropriate for a 40 year old mother of six.

I’m afraid I didn’t really notice Mrs Kilkenny either,” said Frank.

Huh!” Bernadette responded dismissively. “A lot of good it does you going to church on Sundays.

3. The will reading:

A lawyer was reading out the will of a wealthy man to his family and everyone mentioned in the document.

To my loving wife Mary, my rock and without whom my life would have been very different, I leave the mansion in Bel-Air and $20 million,” the lawyer read out loud.

He paused momentarily for his audience to digest this information and then he continued reading.

To my darling daughter Louisa who supported me so much when my health began to fail and never once complained, I leave my business, my yacht and $1 million,” said the lawyer.

Again he paused momentarily to allow this information to sink in.

The lawyer then continued reading the final section of the will, “And to my brother Neville who argued with me constantly, hated my guts and thought I would never mention him in my will. Well, you were wrong. Hi Neville!

4. Engine trouble:

While cruising at 35,000 feet, the aircraft suddenly shuddered violently.

One passenger looked out of the window and then shouted, “Oh my God! One of the engines has just blown up.

The passengers were white with fear when moments later the aircraft was rocked by a second blast as an engine on the opposite side exploded.

Passengers started to panic and the cabin crew struggled to keep order.

However just then the Captain strode confidently from the cockpit and assured everyone that there was nothing about which they should be alarmed.

Reassured by the Captain’s calm manner, passengers returned to their seats and he coolly walked over to the aircraft’s door.

He then grabbed several packages from under the seats near the door and started handing them to the rest of the crew.

Crew members immediately fastened these packages to their backs.

One observant passengers said, “Hey, aren’t they parachutes?

Yes,” said the Captain.

But you said there was no need to be alarmed,” the passenger responded.

There isn’t,” replied the Captain as a third engine suddenly exploded. “We’re going to get help.

5. Cashflow problem at the zoo:

A zoo was experiencing serious cashflow problems due to visitor numbers falling.

The zoo’s management got together to discuss how they could reverse the trend by introducing a major attraction.

Following the meeting the manager persuaded a visitor, who was a very big, stocky man, to take a job dressing up in a gorilla costume and masquerading as a great ape.

This deception worked well as the man really threw himself into the role with enthusiasm; devouring buckets of bananas, swinging from branches, pacing his cage menacingly, beating his chest and roaring loudly.

However one day he went a bit too far and he accidently fell into the lion’s enclosure next door.

Panicking, the bogus gorilla started shouting, “Help! Help!

The lion let out a tremendous roar, then rushed at him. He put his paw on the bogus gorilla’s chest and growled, “Shut up buddy, or we’ll both lose our jobs!

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Short Story Jokes: Here are 5 more to brighten your day

1. Gimme a beer:

A man walks into a bar in Downtown Manhattan and says to the bartender, “Gimme a beer before the problems start!

The man then downs the beer in one before asking the bartender for another, once again saying, “Gimme a beer before the problems start!

Naturally the bartender is a little wary of this guy but he pours him another beer nevertheless.

This goes on for a while, each time with the guy saying, “Gimme a beer before the problems start!

After the fifth beer the bartender is really becoming bewildered by this guy’s approach, so he asks, “Hey buddy, when are you going to pay for all these beers?

To which the guy responds, “This is where the problems start!

2. Twin boys:

A young woman has twin boys but is forced sadly to give them up for adoption.

One boy is adopted by a family in Morocco and they name him Amal.

The other boy goes to a family in Spain and they name him Juan.

Many years later the woman receives a letter from Juan which includes a recent photograph of him.

As she’s looking at the photograph the woman says tearfully to her husband, “Oh, how I wish I had a photograph of Amal too.

To which her husband responds, ”They’re twins. If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Amal.”

3. There’s always one:

A bus completely full with passengers crashes on an icy road and bursts into flames. Sadly everyone on the bus is killed instantly in the crash.

When they all arrive at the Pearly Gates the passengers are met by God, which is an unusual precedent but these were tragic circumstances. The situation is well above St Peter’s pay grade.

As the passengers form an orderly queue, God says, “Since you all died in such a tragic way, I’m here to grant each of you one wish before you enter the Kingdom of Heaven.

The woman at the head of the line’s obviously concerned about her looks, and she says to God “I wish to be beautiful.

God smiles, grants the wish and instantly she is truly beautiful.

The next woman hesitates momentarily but then she decides to wish for the same thing.

Once again God smiles, grants the wish and instantly she is also truly very beautiful.

Whilst all this is going on, a guy at the back of the queue starts to laugh.

Two more women, on seeing how beautiful their two fellow passengers have become, also wish to become beautiful.

God smiles again, their wishes are granted and they too are now very beautiful.

By now the guy at the end of the line is laughing even louder.

Nevertheless one after another, the deceased passengers all request the same wish.

However with each wish granted the guy at the end of the line, seems to laugh even harder.

Finally it’s this guy’s turn to request his wish when God asks, “My son, what’s your wish?

To which the guy responds, “Make them all ugly again!

Moral of the Story: There’s always someone determined to ruin it for everyone else.

4. The problem with getting old:

An 85-year-old man was asked by his doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical examination.

The doctor gave the man a jar and said, “Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.

The next day the old man reappeared at the doctor’s office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as it had been on the previous day.

Naturally the doctor inquired as to what happened.

Well doctor,” the old man explained, “it was like this. First I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, still nothing. Then I asked my wife. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, and still nothing. She even tried with her mouth, still nothing. We even called up Maggie, the lady next door. She tried with both hands, followed by her armpit. She even tried squeezing it between her knees. However still nothing.

Looking shocked the doctor said, “You asked a neighbour?

To which the old man replied, “Yes but none of us could get the lid off the jar.

5. Swapping places:

One day, Einstein had to speak at an important science conference.

Now Einstein’s driver Tom looked remarkably like him, a fact of which Einstein was well aware.

In the car on the way to the conference Einstein said, “You know Tom, I’m sick of speaking at conferences. I just say the same things over and over!

Tom smiled and said, “You’re right. I’ve attended all of them with you and even though I’m not a scientist, I’m sure I could give the conference in your place.

Now that’s a great idea Tom!” said Einstein. “Let’s switch places.

So they immediately switch clothes, Einstein hands Tom his notes and when they arrive at the conference, Tom goes on stage and he starts giving the speech.

Meanwhile dressed in the driver’s uniform, Einstein sits at the side of the stage.

Unfortunately lurking in the audience is one scientist who is determined to impress everyone by asking a difficult question he hopes Einstein will not be able to answer.

When he gets his chance, this guy seizes the moment and interrupts the conference with his very difficult question.

It’s a real curved ball and the audience knows it. The whole room is silent, holding their breath, waiting for Einstein’s response. You could hear a pin drop.

However Tom has been around the block a few times and he wasn’t easily fazed.

He looked the guy dead in the eye, smiled at him and said, “Sir, to demonstrate how easy to answer your question is, I will let my driver reply to it for me.

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5 short story jokes guaranteed to make you laugh

1. The Dead Duck

A woman brings a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon.

As she lays her beloved pet duck on the table, the vet puts his stethoscope to the bird’s chest and listens carefully.

A moment later the vet shakes his head and says sadly, “I’m really sorry mam, but your duck, Cuddles, has passed away.

The woman becomes quite distressed and begins to cry.

Are you sure?” she says with tears flooding from her eyes.

Yes mam, I am sure” the vet responds. “Your duck is definitely dead.

But how can you be so sure?” the woman protests. “I mean, you haven’t done any testing on him or anything have you? Perhaps he’s just stunned or in a coma or something.”

The vet rolls his eyes, then turns around and leaves the room.

A few minutes later he returns with a black Labrador retriever.

As the duck’s owner looks on in amazement, the Labrador stands on his hind legs, puts his front paws on the examination table and sniffs around the duck from top to bottom. He then looks up at the vet with sad eyes and shakes his head.

The vet pats the dog on the head and takes it out of the room.

A few minutes later the vet returns with a cat. The cat jumps on the table and delicately sniffs at the bird from its head to its feet. After a moment the cat looks up, shakes its head, meows softly and strolls out of the room.

The vet looks at the woman and says, “Look mam I’m really sorry, but as I said before, this is most definitely a duck that is no longer of this world. Your duck is dead.

The vet then turns to his computer terminal, hits a few keys and produces a bill, which he hands to the woman.

The duck’s owner, still in shock, looks at the bill and sees it is $150.

$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!” she shrieks with incredulity

The vet shrugs his shoulders and says, “I’m sorry mam. If you’d taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20. However with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it’s now $150.

2. Never underestimate an old man

An elderly man had owned his large farm in Louisiana for many years.

Right at the back of the farm there was a large pond that was ideal for swimming. The old farmer had fixed it up real nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts and some apple and peach trees.

One evening the farmer decides to go down to the pond, to look it over, as he hadn’t been down there for a while.

Before setting off, he grabs a five-gallon bucket as he decides he’ll bring back some fruit.

As he nears the pond, he can hear voices shouting and laughing with glee. Clearly someone is having a good time.

As the farmer gets closer, he can see a bunch of young women who are clearly skinny-dipping in his pond.

He makes the women aware of his presence and immediately they all swim over to the far end.

One of the women then shouts, “We’re not coming out until you leave mister!

The farmer replies, “Ladies, I didn’t come down here to watch you swim naked or make you get out of the pond. You carry on.

The wily old timer then holds up his bucket and says, “I just came down here to feed the alligators!

Moral of the story: Never underestimate an old man.

3. The Hitman

Bill is at the funeral of an old High School friend in Manhattan.

They’re all standing in the graveyard gathering their thoughts after the coffin has been lowered, when Bill notices Jim, another old friend from his High School days.

Hello Jim” says Bill.

Hello buddy, it’s been a long time. How are you?” asks Jim.

Bill responds positively but he’s puzzled as to why Jim is carrying an attaché case at a funeral.

What’s in the case?” asks Bill.

Oh, this is a tool of my trade.” says Jim.

What do you mean? What sort of tool is it?” asks Bill.

It’s a high velocity rifle.” says Jim.

Now why would you need a high velocity rifle?” asks Bill.

 “Because I’m a hitman.” says Jim.

Jog on! You’re yanking my chain, surely?” says Bill.

I’m serious” says Jim, “I make my living as a hitman. Take a look.

With that Jim opens the attaché case to show he does indeed have a high velocity rifle complete with telescopic sight and silencer.

Wow” says Bill, “Can I take a closer look at that?

Sure!” says Jim. With that he assembles the rifle, fits the telescopic sight and then passes it across to Bill.

Bill lifts the rifle to his shoulder and peers through the telescopic sight. “Wow! This is amazing. I can see everything so clearly.

Impressive, eh?” says Jim.

Yes sir. I can see right across Central Park. I can even see my own apartment on the Upper West Side” says Bill. “Wait a minute I can see right through my bedroom window and I can see my wife’s having sex with my neighbour.

Really?” says Jim.

Yeah, really!” says Bill. “How much do you charge for a hit?

Well I charge $10,000 dollars per shot but with this telescopic sight I only ever need one shot to hit the target.” says Jim.

Right!” says Bill. “I’ll have two. I want you to shoot her right through the head and I want you to shoot him in the genitals.

So Jim takes the rifle, puts it so his shoulder, peers down the lens of the telescopic sight and carefully starts taking aim. However he then seems to take an age, as he starts waving the rifle barrel around and keeps adjusting the line of sight.

As he waits, Bill starts getting increasingly agitated as he thinks about what’s going on in his apartment.

What’s going on now?” he asks, clearly freaking out. “What are they doing? Why are you taking so long? Why are you hesitating?

Have patience my friend”, says Jim. “I’m trying to save you ten grand.

4. Jack the cowboy

Jack is a cowboy working on a large ranch in a remote pasture in Wyoming.

One day as he’s overseeing the livestock on the ranch a brand-new BMW suddenly advances towards him creating an enormous cloud of dust in the process

The car stops and the driver is a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses and YSL tie. He steps out of the car and says to the cowboy, “If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?

Jack looks at the man, who’s obviously a yuppie, he then looks at his peacefully grazing animals and responds calmly, “Sure, why not?

The yuppie then whips out a very impressive iPhone X smartphone from his jacket pocket and begins to surf the NASA website. Simultaneously he uses the GPS satellite to get the exact coordinates of his location. He then feeds that back to Google Earth to capture a high-resolution image of this location.

The young man then opens the digital image in Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Langley, Virginia.

Within seconds, he receives an email to his iPhone X to confirm that the image has been processed and the data captured and stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally he uses an AirPrint printer located in his car to print out a full-color, 150-page report. He then turns to Jack, hands him the report and says, “Sir, you’ll see from the Executive Summary that you have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.

That’s right,” says Jack. “I guess you can take one of my calves.

Jack then watches with amusement as the young man struggles to get the animal into the trunk of his car.

After a minute or two, Jack says to the guy, “Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me my calf back?

The young man thinks for a second and then he says, “Sure, why not?

You’re a Congressman for the US Government“, says Jack.

Wow! That’s correct,” says the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?

No guessing required son,” Jack responded. “You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want paying for an answer I already know; to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars-worth of equipment trying to show me how smart you are; and you don’t know a thing about how ordinary, working people make a living, or about cows for that matter. If you did you’d know that this herd is actually a flock of sheep. Now give me back my dog.

5. The old Native American and a $500 loan 

An old Native American man has a need to borrow $500, so he goes to his local bank and asks to speak with the Loans officer.

The banker welcomes him and then says a loan application form must be completed. So he takes a loan application form from his desk drawer and begins to question the old man.

So, what are you going to do with the money?” he asks the man.

Buy silver, make jewelry, then sell it,” the man responded.

And what have you got for collateral?” asked the banker.

Don’t know collateral,” replied the old man

Well that’s something of value that you provide us with to cover the cost of the loan if you fail to repay,” said the banker. “For instance, have you got any vehicles?

Yes. 1979 Chevy pickup,” replied the old man

The banker shook his head, “No that won’t do, I’m afraid. How about livestock?

Yes, I have a horse,” replied the old man.

How old is it?” the banker enquired.

Don’t know, has no teeth,” replies the old man.

The conversation went on like this for a while but eventually the banker decides to grant the $500 loan to the old man.

Several weeks later the old man returns to the bank.

He pulls out a large roll of $100 bills from his pocket, “Here to pay,” he says.

He then hands the banker $500 in $100 bills to repay his loan.

Business has been good I can see,” says the banker. “What are you going to do with the rest of that money?

Keep it close to me,” the old man responded.

Why don’t you just deposit it in my bank,” the banker enquired.

Don’t know deposit,” replied the old man

Well, you just put the money in our bank and we take care of it for you. Whenever you want to use it, you can withdraw it,” the banker responded.

The old Native American man leans across the desk and looks the banker in the eye and asks, “What you got for collateral?

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© Roy J Sutton and Mann Island Media Limited 2019. All Rights Reserved.

15 Quotes by Phyllis Diller

Quotes by Phyllis DillerThe late Phyllis Ada Driver or Phyllis Diller as she was better known was another one of America’s greatest comic talents.

She was an actress and stand-up comedienne with an eccentric stage persona.

Self-deprecating humor was her stock in trade, together with wild hair, zany clothes and an exaggerated, cackling laugh.

Phyllis Diller was a very funny lady and one who is greatly missed by fans of good comedy everywhere.

Quotes by Phyllis Diller:

Here are 15 quotes by Phyllis Diller which should make you smile.

  1. You know what keeps me humble? Mirrors! ~Phyllis Diller
  2. The best contraceptive for old people is nudity. ~Phyllis Diller
  3. You know you’re old if they’ve discontinued your blood type. ~Phyllis Diller
  4. I never made `Who’s Who,’ but I’m featured in `What’s That?’ ~Phyllis Diller
  5. Remarrying a husband you’ve divorced is like having your appendix put back in. ~Phyllis Diller
  6. The only thing my husband and I have in common is that we were married on the same day. ~Phyllis Diller
  7. Nothing was happening in the bedroom. I nicknamed our waterbed the Dead Sea. ~Phyllis Diller
  8. Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going. ~Phyllis Diller
  9. I always wondered how I could tell when the right one came along but it was easy. He was the only one that came along. ~Phyllis Diller
  10. Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age. As your beauty fades, so will his eyesight. ~Phyllis Diller
  11. This woman goes into a gun shop and says, ‘I want to buy a gun for my husband.’ The clerk says, ‘Did he tell you what kind of gun?’ ‘No,’ she replied. ‘He doesn’t even know I’m going to shoot him. ~Phyllis Diller
  12. Life is a do-it-yourself kit; so do it yourself. Work. Practice. ~Phyllis Diller
  13. Let me tell you, a discussion that starts, ‘I’ll tell you something you do that irritates me, if you tell me something I do that bothers you,’ never ends in a hug and a kiss. ~Phyllis Diller
  14. This man I was going out with asked me for my finger measurements. I thought he was going to buy me a ring for Christmas but he gave me a bowling ball. ~Phyllis Diller
  15. To get a roaster clean, send something like baked apples in it to a neighbor. Neighbors always return pans spotless, and you won’t have to use a blow torch on it like you usually do. ~Phyllis Diller

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15 Quotes by Joan Rivers

Quotes by Joan RiversTo comedy lovers everywhere the late Joan Alexandra Molinsky is better known as the legendary Joan Rivers.

Razor sharp and very funny, Joan Rivers was arguably one the finest American stand-up comedians of all time in what was probably the golden age of light entertainment.

By the strength of her personality she managed to succeed in an age when it was even tougher for a woman to get a break in an industry dominated by powerful men. In that she remains a role model for women everywhere.

Joan Rivers pioneered her own brand of irreverent, unconventional comedy and her relentless work ethic allowed her comedy to evolve and her audiences continued to grow. A remarkable lady and one who always made me laugh.

Here are 15 quotes by Joan Rivers, which will make you smile I’m sure.

Quotes by Joan Rivers:

  1. I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking. ~Joan Rivers
  2. The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it. ~Joan Rivers
  3. My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on. ~Joan Rivers
  4. Forty for you, sixty for me. And equal partners we will be. ~Joan Rivers
  5. There is not one female comic who was beautiful as a little girl. ~Joan Rivers
  6. Never floss with a stranger. ~Joan Rivers
  7. I have flabby thighs but fortunately my stomach covers them. ~Joan Rivers
  8. I think anyone who’s perfectly happy isn’t particularly funny. ~Joan Rivers
  9. We don’t apologize for a joke. We are comics. We are here to make you laugh. If you don’t get it, then don’t watch us. ~Joan Rivers
  10. People say that money is not the key to happiness but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made. ~Joan Rivers
  11. I don’t exercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he’d have put diamonds on the floor. ~Joan Rivers
  12. I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again. ~Joan Rivers
  13. Part of my act is meant to shake you up. It looks like I’m being funny, but I’m reminding you of other things. Life is tough, darling. Life is hard. And we better laugh at everything; otherwise, we’re going down the tube. ~Joan Rivers
  14. I never dwell on what happened. You can’t change it. Move forward. Don’t waste your energy on being angry at something that somebody did six months ago or a year ago. It’s over. Done. Move forward. ~Joan Rivers
  15. I walk on a stage, and I know if it’s been a good show or not. You know when it’s been a good interview. No one has to tell you. You know it. You feel it. You can feel the air. You can feel everything about it when it’s a good show. And you know when you’ve messed up. ~Joan Rivers

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If that is the case then please share them with your friends because when you share everyone wins.

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8 hilariously funny jokes that’ll make you scream laughing

hilariously funny jokes1. National identity:

A Scotsman, a Welshman, an Irishman and an Englishman were captured while fighting in a foreign war.

Their situation is quite desperate when the leader of their captors suddenly announces, “As enemies of our people, you will all be shot by firing squad. You’ll each be shot in turn. However we’re civilised people, so first you’ll each be allowed a final request.

The Scotsman says quickly, “I’d like to hear ‘Flower of Scotland’ played by the Band of the Scots Guards, to remind me of happy days in bonny Scotland.” He then shouts, “Scotland forever!

The Welshman says, “Well I’d like to hear ‘Men of Harlech’ sung by the Treorchy Male Voice Choir to remind me of the green, green grass of home and those happy times when I lived in the Valleys.” He then shouts, “God bless the Land of my Fathers!

The Irishman, not to be outdone, says, “For me I want to hear ‘Danny Boy’ just one more time to remind me of the auld country. I want it sung in the style of Daniel O’Donnell.” Then, taking his lead from his Celtic cousins he shouts, “Éirinn go Brách.

The leader of their captors then looks at the Englishman who’s remained very quiet up to this point. “So Englishman, what’s your request?” he says.

The Englishman responds, “I’d like to be shot first.

2. Nun outside a Dublin bar:

A guy is walking into a Dublin bar and standing right outside the door is a nun.

Top of the morning to you sister!” says the guy with a smile.

The nun looks at him sternly and says, “Before you enter this den of iniquity please think about your mother and your father.

But sister, my poor mother and father have long since passed away sadly. They’re with the angels now” the guy responds.

Then think of the damage the alcohol will do to your brain” says the nun.

Sister, what are you talking about? Have you ever had a drink?” asks the guy.

No! Certainly not!” says the nun.

Then in the name of God sister, how can you say it damages the brain if you’ve never actually had a drink?” asks the guy.

The guy thinks for a minute and then he says, “Listen sister, I’ll tell you what. I’ll go in and get you a drink, you can try it and if you don’t like it then you can talk about it. But you can’t talk about something you’ve never even experienced.

The nun says, “Alright, I’ll try a drink.

The guy then says, “So, what’ll you have then?

I don’t know”, says the nun “What do ladies generally drink?

The guy says, “All the ones I know like a glass of gin.

The nun smiles and says, “Alright, I’ll have a gin but get it in a cup so no one will notice.”

So the guy goes into the bar and says to the barman, “I’ll have a pint of Guinness please bartender and a large gin. But can you put the gin in a cup.

The barman smiles at him and says, “Jeez, is that feckin’ nun hanging around outside again.

hilariously funny jokes3. Life in Hell:

John did his best to lead a good and honest life but sadly, on his passing, he’s allocated a place in Hell.

John arrives at the gates of Hell, a little disappointed and he’s looking fairly despondent when another man walks up to him and says, “Hello I’m Jim, you’re looking a little glum.

To which John replies, “Well, I thought I’d be enjoying a place in heaven right now but nothing ever works out like you think it will, does it?

Seeing John’s not very happy, Jim tries to cheer him up. “Listen buddy, Hell isn’t so bad really.

John says, “Really?

Yeah, really”, says Jim. “Hey, do like beer?

Yes I love beer”, John responds.

Then you’ll love Fridays here in Hell. Every Friday is beer day. We drink gallons and gallons of beer all day long. There’s no limit, you can drink as much as you like”, says Jim.

Doesn’t that make you sick and give you a terrible hangover?” asks John

No! We’re dead! It has no effect on us”, says Jim. “Hey, do you like drugs?

Well, I did smoke a little Mary Jane in my College days”, says John.

Then you’ll love Saturdays here in Hell”, says Jim. “Every Saturday we smoke marijuana all day long. We smoke doobies as big as submarines. It’s fantastic.

Doesn’t that make you sick?” asks John

No! We’re dead! It has no effect on us”, says Jim. “Do you like food?

Sure, who doesn’t like food? I love food,” says John.

Then you’re going to love Sundays here in Hell”, says Jim. “Every Sunday they roast Ox; a whole one for each of us. We stuff ourselves with roast Ox and all the trimmings all day long. In Hell we do everything to excess and doing everything to excess is mandatory here. We’re dead, so no worries.

Wow!” says John. “Hell actually sounds like a really fun place.

It does, doesn’t it?” Jim responds.

Hey, are you Gay?” Jim then asks.

No”, says John “I love sex with women.

Jim frowns and says, “Hmm, in that case you’ll hate Mondays.

4. Unrealistic expectations:

A recent engineering graduate is having an interview for his first job with a big technology company.

The young graduate is fresh out of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology and he’s clearly very impressed with himself.

As the interview is nearing an end the Human Resources officer asks him, “So John, what are your expectations in terms of a starting salary?

The young graduate replies, “Well I’d be looking for something in the region of $125,000 a year. However the exact figure I’d accept would depend on the benefits package.

His interviewer smiles and says, “Well John, what would you say to 5 weeks annual vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental cover, the company matching your retirement fund to 50% of your salary, plus a company car, say a Ford Mustang GT?

The young graduate engineer sits up straight and says, “Wow! Are you kidding?

The HR officer replies, “Yes of course I am John, but you started it.

hilariously funny jokes5. Bus full of ugly people:

A bus full of ugly people is involved in a head on collision with a truck and all the passengers are killed.

They all arrive in heaven and, feeling sorry for them, God decides they can each have one wish.

A woman is the first person and she says, “I want to be gorgeous.

So God snaps his fingers and suddenly she is stunningly attractive.

A man is next and he makes a similar request. “I want to be handsome” he says.

This goes on with each passenger in turn essentially making the same request. They all want to be irresistibly good looking.

With a number of passengers yet to express their wish, God notices that the last man in the line who has also yet to make a request is laughing hysterically.

By the time God gets to the last few people, the last man in the line is laughing uncontrollably and he’s rolling around on the ground.

When it comes to his turn the man laughs some more and then says, “I wish they’re all ugly again.

Moral of the story: In any group there’s always one person hell bent on making life difficult for everyone else.

6. The warrior and the old man:

A fleeing warrior is lost in the desert and he’s in desperate need of water.

Suddenly he sees what he thinks is a stall far off in the distance.

Hoping he might find water there, he hurries towards the stall only to find a little old man selling ties.

The warrior asks, “Do you have any water?

The old replies, “No I don’t have any water. Would you like to buy a tie? They’re only $5.

The warrior is irritated by his response and says, “No! I don’t need an over-priced tie right now. I need water! You realize I’m armed? I could kill you. However I must find water first.

Alright” says the old man, “It doesn’t matter to me that you don’t want to buy a tie and that you don’t like me. I will show you that I’m the bigger person. If you continue over that hill to the east for about two miles, you will find a lovely restaurant, owned by my brother. It will have all the ice cold water you need. God be with you“.

Muttering, the warrior staggers off over the hill.

Several hours later he staggers back, almost dead.

Your brother won’t let me in without a tie.

7. The magic trick:

Two broke and hungry friends, Bill and George walk into a pastry shop in Manhattan.

As the baker’s back is turned, Bill grabs three cookies quickly and stuffs them in his trouser pocket with lightning speed.

The baker’s back is still turned, so he doesn’t notice.

Bill smiles at George, winks his eye and says, “Did you see that? Did you see how clever I was there? You’ll never beat that will you?

Really? You think so? Watch this.” George replies.

He then says to the baker, “If you’ll give me a cookie, I’ll show you a magic trick. And I promise you, you’ll be impressed.

So the baker hands him a cookie which George then eats.

Then George says to the baker: “I’ll need another cookie from you for my magic trick to work.

The baker is a bit suspicious but he gives George another cookie. Once again he eats the cookie.

Then George says, “I’m really sorry but I’ll need one more cookie if this trick is to work.

The baker is really not amused by now and he says, “Is this some kind of joke?

George assures him the trick is genuine and all will be revealed after the next Cookie. So the baker gives him another cookie which George promptly eats, once again.

The baker is starting to get mad and he yells, “So where’s the magic?

George points at Bill and then says: “You’ll find three cookies in this guy’s pocket. That’s magic!

8. A woman golfing:

A woman is out golfing. Playing off the first tee, she’s not quite got her swing right and she slices the ball on her first attempt and watches it disappear deep into the woods.

Not a great start she thinks. So she trudges off looking for her ball.

As she’s scratching around in the woods she can’t find her ball but she does find a frog stuck in a trap.

The frog is relieved to have finally been discovered, having been stuck there for quite some time. So the frog says to the woman, “Lady, if you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes.

Now who wouldn’t want three wishes? So the woman immediately frees the frog.

The frog is grateful but then says, “Lady, thank you. I appreciate your help. However I failed to mention that there will be a condition to your wishes.

A little puzzled, the woman asks, “And what’s that?

Well” says the frog, “Whatever you wish for, your husband will also receive but multiplied by a factor of ten!

The woman thinks for a minute and then says, “That’s fine.

Then for her first wish she says, “I want to be the most beautiful woman in the world.

The frog smiles but warns her, “You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world? He will be an Adonis and no woman will be able to resist his charms.

The woman thinks for a minute and then says, “That’s alright, because I will be the most beautiful woman in the world, so he will only have eyes for me.

With that there is a ‘Poof’ sound and the woman is immediately transformed into the most beautiful woman in the world.

The frog then says, “And for your second wish? What would you like?

For her second wish the woman says, “I want to be the richest woman in the world.

Once again the frog feels compelled to issue a warning. “Lady, this will make your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than you.

The woman says, “That’s fine. We’re married, so what’s mine is his and what’s his is mine.

Once again there is a ‘Poof’ sound and the woman is suddenly the richest woman in the world.

The frog then says, “Right, it’s now time for your final wish. What will it be?

The woman replies, “I’d like a mild heart attack.

Moral of the story: Women are clever. So don’t mess with them.

Attention Female Readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue to feel good.

 

Male Readers: Please scroll down.

 

 

 

The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife.

Moral of the story: Women think they’re really smart. Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show.

Note: And ladies if you’re still reading this, it only goes to show that women never listen to men.

Please share the fun:

I hope you found these hilariously funny jokes amusing dear reader.

However perhaps you feel that you could still use a good laugh? If so click on the links below. You’ll find plenty of smiles to amuse you.

And if you’ve enjoyed what you’ve read here today then please share these witty quotes with all  your friends on social media. When you share, everyone wins.

It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Other articles guaranteed to amuse you:

© Roy J Sutton and Mann Island Media Limited 2018. All Rights Reserved.

3 Side-splitting Jokes about Heaven and Hell

Side-splitting Jokes1. The transport you get in Heaven:

New Yorkers Frank, George and Vinny are killed in a tragic car crash in Manhattan.

The three friends arrive at the entrance to the Pearly Gates and there is St Peter waiting for them.

After the initial pleasantries, St Peter says to them, “Gentlemen, Heaven is an enormous place, so you will need transport to get around. And I have to tell you now that the type of transport you will be allocated will depend on how faithful you were to your wives.

He then turns to Frank and says, “Francis, how faithful were you to your wife?

I never strayed once”, says Frank. “From the day we met until my dying day, she was the only woman with whom I slept and I loved her very much.

Most impressive Francis”, says St Peter. “Such fidelity is worthy of a new $13 million Rolls-Royce Sweptail and here are the keys. You’ll find your car in the parking lot just inside the Pearly Gates.

Turning to George, St Peter said, “And how faithful have you been George?

George hesitated momentarily and then said, “I must be honest and tell you that I did have a brief affair with my secretary about 20 years ago. It was the only time I cheated and I did regret it. I love my wife and after that brief lapse I was faithful to her until my dying day.

Very well”, said St Peter. “You made one mistake but otherwise you were of good character. Your reward now is a Chevrolet Bolt. Here are your keys and you’ll find the car in the parking lot inside the Gates.

St Peter then turned to Vinny and said, “So Vincent, were you as well behaved as your friends?

Vinny looked a little embarrassed as he responded. “St Peter, if I’m honest I was an inveterate womanizer and I’ve had more sexual encounters than I can remember. However I did love my wife and I would never have left her.”

St Peter frowned as he spoke in response, “Vincent your behaviour was less than exemplary but you did at least say you loved your wife and you never left her, so that counts for something. Therefore I will give you a top-of-the-range mountain bike to enable you to get around. You’ll find it in the cycle rack inside the Gates.

The three friends then spent the next few weeks travelling around in Heaven getting to know the place.

One day as Vinny was cycling along Heaven’s highway he saw a Rolls Royce Sweptail parked by the side of the road. As he got close, he could see Frank sitting in the driver’s seat sobbing.

Hey buddy, what’s the matter?” said Vinny. “You’ve driving a beautiful Rolls Royce, what could possibly be wrong?

I know”, said Frank, “but I’ve just seen my wife go past on a skateboard.

Side-splitting Jokes2. The reward for a life of sin:

Three drinking buddies, Bill, Jim and Cyril died in a plane crash on the way to Las Vegas and they all found themselves in Hell.

No sooner had they walked through the Gates of Hell than they found themselves staring at a series of doors.

Bill opened the first door and out stepped a really ugly woman, her face covered in hideous warts.

The voice of the Devil then boomed out, “William, you have been a sinner and so you are condemned to spend eternity in bed with this poor woman.

The woman then took Bill by the hand and led him through the door he’d opened to suffer his punishment.

Jim and Cyril naturally were feeling very apprehensive at this point.

However Jim plucked up the courage to open the second door which revealed a woman who was even uglier than the first one. She was a grinning, toothless hag with a hunched back and a bad case of body odour.

Again the voice of the Devil then boomed out, “James, you too have sinned and so you are condemned to spend eternity in bed with this wretched woman.

The woman then took Jim by the hand and led him through the door to suffer his punishment.

Naturally, at this point Cyril was a nervous wreck as he was about to open the third door.

He feared the worst, although he knew he hadn’t been much of a sinner so he hoped it wouldn’t be another hag.

Cyril was pleasantly surprised when out stepped a beautiful blond in a very brief bikini.

Wow!” thought Cyril.

Then the Devil’s voice boomed out, “Maria, you have been a sinner so you are condemned to spend eternity with this hideous wretch.

Side-splitting Jokes3. Hoping for a miracle:

Bernard was a deeply religious man and one day he found himself trapped on the roof of his house following a terrible flood after the worst storms in living memory.

After an hour or so a man came by in a boat and shouted to Bernard, “Get in!

No”, said Bernard, “I have faith in God. He will ensure my safety.

Soon the water had completely submerged Bernard’s house and it was lapping around his waist.

Suddenly another man came by in a boat and shouted, “Get in!

No”, said Bernard, “I have faith in God. He will ensure my safety.

Another hour went by and the water was now lapping around Bernard’s chest.

Yet another boat came along and a man shouted to Bernard, “Get in!

No”, said Bernard, “I have faith in God. He will ensure my safety.

Well, the water kept on rising and it was now up around his neck when a helicopter appeared and down came a ladder. The crewman on the ladder shouted to Bernard, “Hey buddy, climb up!

No”, said Bernard, “I have faith in God. He will ensure my safety.

Another hour went by and the next thing Bernard knew he was standing at the Pearly Gates in front of St Peter.

At this point Bernard felt very disheartened as he said to St Peter, “I feel completely let down. I truly believed God would save me.

Be fair”, said St Peter, “We did send you three boats and a helicopter.

Please share the fun:

I hope you found these jokes truly side-splitting dear reader.

However perhaps you feel that you could still use a good laugh? If so click on the links below. You’ll find plenty of smiles to amuse you.

And if you’ve enjoyed what you’ve read here today then please share these jokes with all  your friends on social media. When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Other articles guaranteed to amuse you:

© Roy J Sutton and Mann Island Media Limited 2018. All Rights Reserved.

13 corny jokes that will really make you smile

Corny JokesLife shouldn’t be serious all the time. Occasionally we all need to smile.

So my question to you today is; do you like corny jokes?

No?

Well that’s a pity because I’ve found 13 of them that made me smile. And I hope they will make you smile too.

The source of these corny jokes is a website called Tickld which is new to me.

However I had a very pleasant time enjoying all the funnies it had on offer.

A link to Tickld is included so take a look but not before you’ve enjoyed what I thought was some of their best corny jokes.

And here are those 13 corny jokes for you:-

Corny Jokes:

I bought my friend an elephant for his room.

He said: Thank you.

And I said: Don’t mention it!

 

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

 

My friend said to me: What rhymes with orange?

And I said: No it doesn’t!

 

What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?

Phillipe Phillope.

 

What do you call a dog that does magic tricks?

A labracadabrador.

 

Corny JokesSo what if I don’t know what Armageddon means? It’s not the end of the world.

 

How do you get two whales in a car? Start in England and drive west.

 

I’ve found a job helping a one armed typist do capital letters. It’s shift work.

 

What did the pirate say when he turned 80 years old?

Aye matey.

 

I couldn’t figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me.

 

People in Dubai don’t like the Flintstones. But people in Abu Dhabi do!

 

How did the hipster burn his mouth?

He ate the pizza before it was cool.

 

It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.

Please share these jokes with your friends on social media:

So did these corny jokes really make you smile? Were they all you hoped they’d be dear reader?

Perhaps you feel that you could still use a good laugh?

If so. then click on the links below. You’ll find plenty of smiles to amuse you.

And if you’ve enjoyed what you’ve read then please share it all with your friends on social media.

Share the fun and everyone wins. Put a smile on someone else’s face and you’ve done your good deed for the day

And if you’d like to see what else Tickld has to offer then just CLICK HERE.

Other articles guaranteed to amuse you:

© Roy J Sutton and Mann Island Media Limited 2018. All Rights Reserved.

10 hilarious jokes sure to make you laugh out loud

Hilarious jokes sure to make you laughIf you’re in need of a good laugh and let’s face it, we all need a good laugh, then once again and I’ve been collecting jokes just for you dear reader.

I’ve done the hard work so you don’t have to and I’m confident that you will find today’s joke collection very funny.

So here is another batch of hilarious jokes sure to make you laugh.

And remember; if they have you falling over laughing your socks off then please, please share them with your friends on social media but not before you’ve actually enjoyed today’s jokes.

1. One man and his talking dog:

Jim walks into a New York bar with his dog Fido.

Jim walks right up to the bar, turns to face the seated customers and says, “This is my dog Fido and believe it or not, he’s a talking dog. If I can demonstrate to you that Fido can answer any of my questions who will buy me a drink?

Listen buddy, if you can demonstrate that Fido can talk, you can have a drink on the house,” says the bartender.

So Jim turns to Fido and asks, “What goes on the top of a house?

Roof!” Fido responds.

What does tree bark feel like?” asks Jim.

Rough!” says Fido.

Who was the greatest baseball player ever?” asks Jim.

Ruth!” says Fido.

The bartender is really unimpressed with what he’s hearing and he snaps at Jim. “You’re a phoney buddy. We’re not fooled by any of that. You and your dog can get out of here right now. Go on, on your way!

As Jim and his dog are thrown out on to the street, Fido looks sadly at Jim and says. “What did I do wrong? Should I have said Joe DiMaggio or Mickey Mantle?

2. The thief and the Parrot:

A thief breaks into a house when he thinks no one will be at home.

He’s creeping carefully through the property and as he steps into the lounge he’s stopped dead in his tracks when he suddenly hears someone say very clearly, “Jesus is watching you!

He stands very still for a moment until everything in the house falls silent again. At this point he moves forward very slowly.

Once again he hears that voice, “Jesus is watching you!

The thief is now frightened out of his wits and he stops once again to focus on locating the voice.

He’s looking around peering into the darkness when he spots a birdcage and in the birdcage is a parrot.

The thief looks the parrot in the eyes and asks, “Was that you who said, ‘Jesus is watching me’?

Yes”, said the parrot.

The thief relaxes and breathes a sigh of relief. “Thank goodness for that”, he says to the parrot. “What’s your name?

The family here call me Ronald”, said the parrot.

Ronald? You cannot be serious!” laughs the thief. “What sort of family calls their pet parrot Ronald?

The sort of family who call their ferocious, Rottweiler guard dog Jesus” the parrot responds.

3. Hospital banter:

Five surgeons are taking their lunch break and enjoying a little banter to relax. The conversation moves on quickly to the people they regard as the best patients.

The first surgeon says, “For me, it’s got to be accountants. They are the best people to operate on because when you open them up, everything on the inside is numbered.

The second surgeon responds, “No, I don’t agree. Librarians have to be the best people on which to operate because everything inside them is in alphabetical order.

The third surgeon thinks for a minute, smiles and then he says, “Sounds like you’ve never operated on an electrician. When you open them up you’ll find everything inside them is color coded!

The fourth surgeon laughs and says,” Well personally I prefer lawyers. They’re heartless, spineless, gut-less and their heads and butts are interchangeable.

The fifth surgeon has been quietly listening to the conversation so far when he’s asked by the others what he thinks.

Well I like to operate on engineers because they’re always very understanding if I find myself with a few parts left over when the job’s done” he says.

4. Talking dog for sale:

A couple are out for a walk when they notice a large sign outside a house which reads, “Talking Dog for Sale.

They are both intrigued by the idea of a talking dog, so they knock on the door and ask if they can take a look at this dog

Sure!” says the owner, “Come on in.

The owner escorts them into the lounge where the dog is lying on the sofa watching television.

Hello,” they say to the dog.

Hello,” the dog responds.

What have you done with your life so far then?” the couple ask the dog.

Well actually I’ve led a very full life,” says the dog.

Really?” says the couple.

Yes really,” says the dog. “I’ve lived in the Alps rescuing avalanche victims. Then I served my country in Iraq. And now I work part-time reading to the residents in a retirement home.

The couple are amazed by this. They can’t believe any dog could have done quite so much.

One of them then asks the dog’s owner, “Why on earth would you want to get rid of this amazing dog?

“Oh, we’re getting rid of him because he’s a liar. He’s not done any of those things” says the owner.

5. Miscommunication:

Jed goes into a public restroom and he’s barely sat down in the cubicle when he hears a voice say, “Hi, how are you?

Feeling a little embarrassed Jed says politely, “Well I guess I’m doing fine thank you!

The voice then responds, “So what are you up to?

Jed is even more embarrassed but once again he responds politely, “Well just like you, I’m sitting here trying to get a load off my mind.

He then hears the voice say, “Hey, can I come over?

Jed is now extremely embarrassed and starting to get slightly irritated too, so he snaps back, “Look, surely you understand I’m a bit busy right now!

At this point he hears the voice say, “Jane listen, I’ll have to call you back. There’s an idiot in the next cubicle who keeps responding to all my questions!

6. Two hunters:

Two hunters are out in the woods hunting bears when one of them suddenly collapses.

The other guy checks him over and realises that he’s not breathing and his eyes are a bit glazed. So he grabs his cell phone and immediately calls 911.

I think my friend’s dead!” he yells down the phone with panic in his voice. “What should I do?

Sir, if you can just calm down I’ll help you” says the operator calmly. “Let’s just make sure he’s dead first.

There’s then a moment of silence, followed by what is clearly a gunshot.

Back on the phone, the guy then says to the operator, “Right, now what?

7. Cosmetic surgery:

Jill, a middle-aged woman, is having surgery in hospital following a severe heart attack when she has a vision of God by her bedside.

Will I die God?” she asks.

To which God responds, “No my dear, you still have 30 more years to live yet.

Well if she’s got 30 more years to look forward to and since she’s in hospital anyway, Jill decides she might as well make the most of her operation.

So she gets breast implants, liposuction, a tummy tuck, a hair transplant, and collagen injections in her lips. When it’s all finished and the bruises have healed she looks absolutely stunning and 10 years younger.

The day she’s discharged from the hospital, she leaves the hospital with a real spring in her step. Feeling very good about her makeover, Jill steps into the street and is immediately knocked down by an ambulance and killed.

As she steps through the Pearly Gates, Jill sees God and decides to complain. “You said I had 30 more years to live,” she says to God.

Well that’s true,” says God.

So what happened?” Jill asks.

To which God shrugs and says, “I’m sorry but I didn’t recognize you.

8. Kids are smarter than you think:

A young boy walks into a barber’s shop and the barber whispers to the customer to whom he’s currently attending, “This kid has got to be the dumbest kid in the world. Watch and I’ll prove it to you.

The barber then puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then he says to the boy, ‘Hey kid, which do you want the dollar bill or the quarters?’

The boy decides to take the quarters and then he leaves the shop.

What did I tell you?” said the barber. “That dumb kid never learns!

Later, when the customer is leaving the barber’s shop he sees the same kid coming out of the ice cream store.

“Hey, kid! May I ask you a question?” asks the customer. “Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?

The boy licks his ice cream for a moment before saying, “Because the day I take the dollar bill the game is over!

9. Classmates:

While waiting for her first appointment with her new dentist, Jane notices his degree certificate on the wall, which includes his full name.

Suddenly, Jane remembers a tall, handsome boy from her High School class some 45 years ago who had exactly the same name. Naturally she wonders whether this can be the same guy.

However upon seeing him, she quickly dismisses any such thought. Surely this ageing, balding, grey-haired old man with a deeply lined face could not possibly be one of her old High School classmates?

After he had finished examining her teeth, Jane decides to ask him whether they he attended the local high school.

Yes,” he replied.

That’s amazing. What year did you graduate then?” Jane asks.

In 1973” he responds.

Amazing, you were in my class!” Jane exclaims.

He looks at her closely and then asks, “What subject did you teach?

10. The Monastery:

Every ten years in the Monastery, the monks were allowed to break their vow of silence to speak just two words.

With ten years gone by, Brother Michael gets his first chance to speak.

He thinks for a second and then says, “Food bad.

Another ten years go by and again Brother Michael has an opportunity to speak briefly and on this occasion he says, “Bed hard.

A further decade later, it’s the big day once more. However this time Brother Michael gives the head monk a long stare before saying, “I quit.

To which the head monk responds, “I’m not surprised. You’ve been complaining ever since you got here.

Please share with your friends on social media:

So did these hilarious jokes make you laugh out loud? Were they all you hoped they’d be dear reader?

Perhaps you feel that you could still use a good laugh?

If so. then click on the links below. You’ll find plenty of smiles to amuse you.

And if you’ve enjoyed what you’ve read then please share it all with your friends on social media.

When you share, everyone wins. It’s always a good idea to pass on the smiles.

Other articles guaranteed to amuse you:

© Roy J Sutton and Mann Island Media Limited 2018. All Rights Reserved.

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